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Is it okay to date more than one girl?

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  • 02-07-2018 12:47am
    #1
    0byme75341jo28
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,571 ✭✭✭


    Like, in the early stages.

    I'm recently single and only now getting back in "the game" so am pretty inexperienced. Is it okay to meet a girl for a few dates while seeing another one or two girls before "going exclusive" or is it a better idea to just date one at a time? I'm just talking to a few at the moment and don't really know what to do.

    I'm in my early 20s if that makes any difference.

    Cheers


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    #2
    Eircom_Sucks
    Registered Users Posts: 3,193 ✭✭✭Eircom_Sucks


    Single lad do what you like , fill ur boots , until you say “ we are exclusive you can do what you like “ but ...... if 1 finds out about the other don’t expect compasion


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    #3
    0byme75341jo28
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,571 ✭✭✭0byme75341jo28


    Eircom_Sucks wrote: »
    Single lad do what you like , fill ur boots , until you say “ we are exclusive you can do what you like “ but ...... if 1 finds out about the other don’t expect compasion

    Would it really be a big deal if they found out, generally speaking? I presume they've multiple fellas on the go like, no problem with it...


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    #4
    Eircom_Sucks
    Registered Users Posts: 3,193 ✭✭✭Eircom_Sucks


    Samir Tasteless Show wrote: »
    Would it really be a big deal if they found out, generally speaking? I presume they've multiple fellas on the go like, no problem with it...

    They will tell you that you are the only one but <SNIP>

    Do what you like and keep it quiet ;)

    If and when you ready to settle with one , then let the others down

    Women don’t think like men , 1 set of rules for them and us


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    #5
    PLL
    Registered Users Posts: 893 ✭✭✭PLL


    From a woman in late 20s point of view: nothing wrong with it in theory. But if the girls find out it will probably put them off you.

    You should know after a couple of dates with each, which you like more, and can drop one and persue the other.

    Use condoms if you're intimate. Have fun!


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    #6
    Rachiee
    Registered Users Posts: 880 ✭✭✭Rachiee


    It seems to be generally acceptable. The girl Im dating at the moment though asked if we were going to date could we do it exclusively, i was like yeah sure. i dont really like dating more than one person at a time anyway as I like to put my energy into things give it my best shot.

    But if you are doing online dating theres nothing wrong with setting up a few face to face meetings with different women, you might only get one or two dates off someone you meet online anyway so why not.


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    #7
    Irish_rat
    Registered Users Posts: 2,555 ✭✭✭Irish_rat


    I generally don't like it myself but you're free to do what you like.


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    #8
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I’d find it really unattractive and I’d probably leave it if knew that was case


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    #9
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Samir Tasteless Show wrote: »

    I'm recently single and only now getting back in "the game" so am pretty inexperienced. Is it okay to meet a girl for a few dates while seeing another one or two girls before "going exclusive" or is it a better idea to just date one at a time? I'm just talking to a few at the moment and don't really know what to do.

    I'm in my early 20s if that makes any difference.

    Cheers

    without wanting to sound too cliched OP, it really is all about context and it depends on -

    what you want.
    what the person/persons you are dating want and how they interpret the situations.
    and what exactly those situation of each "relationship" actually are ->there is a difference between dating/meeting somebody for 1st or 2nd time, having a f*ck buddy or Friends with benefits etc etc.

    I was in your shoes a few years ago and i was shall we say, "in contact" with four girls at the same time after i became single.

    Girl 1 was a housemate of a friend and we had a F Buddy (her words) thing going so that suited us both until she actually wanted a relationship.

    around the same time, the Girl 2 was an old college friend who found out I was single and text me to come over one night at 2am and we had a FWB thing going after that.

    Girl 3rd was a girl id dated before that like girl 2, found out i was single and became interested for a few weeks but nothing became official before it fizzled out. that one started about 3 days after id met with girl 2 for the first time.

    Girl 4 was a complete random stranger that was i thought at first, just a one night stand (i met her a few days after i started seeing girl 3 :) ) - however, i felt a good connection with this one, she was lovely and keen and we started dating and then got into an exclusive relationship. i had completely cut all contact with the other 3 girls by the time this started becoming official. that lasted about 6 months before it ended as i had a huge amount of work travel to do and i ended up not really seeing her that much so it fizzled out. i also decided that i liked the single life of previous months too much so i went back to that again for a while.

    it all worked out well though girl 1 did meet girl 4 a couple of months later as my friend brought her out on a night out (the dope :)) when my new missus was out with us - that was a bit awkward and i got a few nasty messages off her over it but apart from that, the entire experience was very good and id recommend everybody to try it at least once in their life.


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    #10
    Lux23
    Registered Users Posts: 7,134 ✭✭✭Lux23


    I used to do this, but I just found it exhausting and confusing. Having said that if you're not interested in a relationship then work away. But tell the girls in no uncertain terms because it might get messy down the line.


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    #11
    Emme
    Registered Users Posts: 4,055 ✭✭✭Emme


    Samir Tasteless Show wrote: »
    Like, in the early stages.

    I'm recently single and only now getting back in "the game" so am pretty inexperienced. Is it okay to meet a girl for a few dates while seeing another one or two girls before "going exclusive" or is it a better idea to just date one at a time? I'm just talking to a few at the moment and don't really know what to do.

    I'm in my early 20s if that makes any difference.

    Cheers

    It's nearly the norm these days for guys of all ages to multi-date. In your 20s you have no responsibilities so as long as you are honest with the girls, use protection and remember to call them by the right names :D there's no problem with it. Get out there and enjoy yourself!


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    #12
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    What people on here think is irrelevant. If the girls you're dating are happy to be on a list of options, that's up to them, not us, best of luck to everyone involved. If you need to sneak around and keep them secret from each other, then that answers your question, if it was ok, you'd be able to tell them.


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