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Can't find a gf

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  • 19-05-2018 9:21pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    So my last serious relationship was in secondary school for 3 years and ended just after doing the leaving cert. I didn't go to college as I loved the job I was. Now I am still in said job but it has become extremely demanding but I absolutely love it and it pays quite well so quitting is definitely not an option. I'm working somewhere different everyday so lots of overnight stays, some 7 day work weeks and often I have work to finish when I get home from work in the evenings. I have a good group of friends, which I unfortunately don't see as often as I like due to being away most weekends and being tired from work etc.

    Whenever I do get a chance to go out to pubs/clubs I have no problem talking to women but it's taking things further I'm having issues with. I don't know what it is, I'm think it might be that I'm being too nice if that makes sense? Now I am in no rush to find a gf, better wait for the right one than rush into something with the wrong one. I take care of myself and dress well so that isn't an issue. Not the best looking guy around the place, would say I'm average tbh. Anyone have any tips? Thanks in advance.


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    #2
    Arrival
    Closed Accounts Posts: 779 ✭✭✭Arrival


    Stop looking for a girlfriend. The best thing to do is look at it like this; interact with girls with the intention of becoming friends with them and actually be a friend. If something from that develops romantically then great, if not then at least you have a friend who will hopefully be able to invite you to social things where you'll meet their other friends and acquaintances. Girls naturally have a defensive wall up when random guys hit on them and it's less so when they know you're a friend of a friend. It will all happen naturally from there. You don't want to be in a relationship with someone who you couldn't be friends with anyway. Just concentrate on developing yourself to be the best possible person you can be mentally, emotionally and physically. Be someone that people wish to spend more time around and they will. You may alos be looking in the wrong places, there are plenty of good girls looking for genuine relationships that you'll never meet in some pub or bar so take up some interesting hobbies and, again, just make friends through them.


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    #3
    begbysback
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,910 ✭✭✭begbysback


    Stay out of the friend zone


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    #4
    Mokuba
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,690 ✭✭✭Mokuba


    Definitely do not try to be friends with someone that you have a romantic interest in. It's awful advice.

    You'll be considered a friend, you won't considered for a romantic relationship if that is how you present yourself - and she also won't appreciate you not being honest with your intentions.

    You can try online dating, or you can go out more. You have to be visible to women to meet one - if you are working or at home the whole time then you will clearly never meet someone.


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    #5
    heretothere
    Registered Users Posts: 622 ✭✭✭heretothere


    Do you ask girls on dates? When you're talking to women when your out, ask for their number! Then follow up the next day, 'It was lovely chatting to you last night. Fancy meeting up some time?' simple as that! Will you get rejected some times, not than likely but will you get dates some times, yes.


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