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Driving lessons are starting to stress me out don't know what to do?

  • 28-04-2018 1:12am
    #1
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,012 ✭✭✭✭


    So I'm on a provisional license been learning about 2-3 years.
    First year I did quite a lot with my instructor as I didn't have a car or no one who had a car to take me out . I was in college also so I do blocks then have some time apart . Got to a fairly good stage but it got to point where instructor would only do some general driving and three point turns stuck on that for ages and I'd be told a lot how I wasn't ready to drive alone etc.
    And last year I reduced lessons just got one here and there maybe about 5 was getting bored.
    I tried new instructor recommended hadn't driven in a while the car was different took me time to get use that car at the start like 30mins as felt different. He'd give to me alot even when I tried explaining it's a different car but anyway he had me do more things throughout the lessons it's when I make mistake he shouts. Today had another one reverse around corner not done much I made few errors he shouted at me in like personal way like whats wrong with you etc whats going on in your head. That got me quite stressed anxious then almost cried as I felt so bad I tried explain I'm learning not used to that didn't accept. We also had to turn into car park near shops busy I'd never driven car near entrance so was tight gap turning into the place I was too slow or tight. Again gave out to me in the same being to slow etc.
    I not sure if its the lack of practise outside lessons holding me back. But I have driven well I know I can. I feel like I've lost confidence shouting almost making it worse like I'm so terrible nervous to go out driving with that instructor again. Do I need to get car drive in empty car park get someone to come out with me.


Comments

  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 22,656 ✭✭✭✭Tokyo


    Find a new driving instructor. If your current instructor is shouting at every learner driver who is making a mistake, then he's obviously nowhere near equipped for doing such a job. An inevitable part of learning something new is that you'll not be perfect at it from the get-go - find an instructor that is actually understanding of that.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,766 ✭✭✭GingerLily


    Of course you shouldn't be learning to drive with someone shouting at you for making mistakes, your meant to be making mistakes at this stage - your learning.
    I personally cannot learn anything when I'm being shouted at!
    I've just started lessons back myself, I'm starting from scratch to build up my confidence because that's what I struggle most with.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,514 ✭✭✭bee06


    Shouting at you is completely unprofessional. There is no point in you being a nervous wreak getting into the car with him. Get a new driving instructor who can actually teach.


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 440 ✭✭GritBiscuit


    Just to add to the above, which I'm in complete agreement with - stress will actually hinder your ability to think and process properly. The brain floods with chemicals pushing you into fight and flight mode and the nuances of delicate motor function go out the window. So, not only is this a terrible instructor who has terrible teaching methods - it's also the cause of you making mistakes and misjudging.

    Get a new instructor pronto - phone around a tell them do they specialise in anxious drivers through their test. Driving is a bit like swimming, it's a little bit technique and a lot about confidence. Don't beat yourself up that you don't have the ability. A little bit of confidence and you'll be doing great.

    Best of luck!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 258 ✭✭HairMare


    Defo get new instructor, my last nearly put me off doing the test completely, kept reminding me about a crash id had and grabbing my steering wheel... im driving years and have since passed at the weekend.

    So dont let it put u off. Best of luck with the lessons, you will get there !!!


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  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 109 ✭✭Jasper_


    I dont know if youre in a position to purchase your own car or not, but that would be my suggestion. I couldnt even get out of first gear and I bought myself a starter car. My mam actually had to test drive it and bring it home, lol.

    Once your own car is sitting in front of your house you will be a pro in no time. People are generally willing to spare a half hour here or there if its your car (and petrol).

    I know you shouldnt but after I got confident enough I would go out most nights at 1am for a 20 min drive around my local estate. Its all about repetition and confidence, and nothing allows for this more than having your own car and going for a sneaky drive alone around empty roads.

    Also second what others say about your current instructor, git rid, he is grossly unprofessional!


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 15,411 ✭✭✭✭woodchuck


    The first thing you need to do is find a new driving instructor!!

    Following that, getting your own banger would be a good idea. That's what I did; the fact that I had spent money buying and insuring it meant I was determined to use it! However, do you have a licenced driver to go out with to practice?


  • Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 11,624 ✭✭✭✭meeeeh


    Mindful111 wrote: »
    I not sure if its the lack of practise outside lessons holding me back. But I have driven well I know I can. I feel like I've lost confidence shouting almost making it worse like I'm so terrible nervous to go out driving with that instructor again. Do I need to get car drive in empty car park get someone to come out with me.
    You don't drive well. I suspect your first instructor was right and you need more practice. You also need different instructor. Ask around and find out who is maybe good with older or not that confident drivers.

    I'm not being mean, I was you and I needed more practice than some of my friends. I am now competent, confident driver but I needed patient and calm instructor to learn to drive. Don't compare yourself to others, if it takes longer it takes longer and get lessons fairly close together. 5 lessons in one year is pointless, you won't learn to drive if you practice that sporadically.


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