I don't know what to do.

Glenpatrick2

In a long distance relationship for a good year and a half. Over this period we first started seeing each other at the nearest city and then started staying over at each others for a weekend.
when i was out with my friends I'd be messaging him as well. he'd be complaining that he has no friends and that he wanted to go out. i stopped hanging out with them and just so i could keep him happy. I've lost my best friend because i was distancing myself and we hardly talked anymore. when i go out with family he does the same thing complain that he cant go out with his, but he goes to town with them everyday. i was gone on a bonding trip with my class and he kept insisting we video chat when I'm there trying to enjoy my night with the people around me. I made us go on a break because of that. i was very hard to do when he kept texting me. After that we went back to normal but recently when he's in a bad mood he takes it out on me over snapchat or messanger.
I'm too good. i can't break up with i'm because I love him and he kept going on about how he has nothing without me and that I'm the only person he talks to.. and that he's sorry. Theres only so much i can take and i feel trapped .. it's like a never ending cycle... we had planned and did so much.. i need help i don't know what to do.

Zagato

Sounds like a relationship you need to get out of. Worry about your own happiness and fulfilment first.

runningbuddy

This sounds awful OP. I think you know what to do. Get out, it's not worth it.

Big Bag of Chips

Christ! A long distance relationship where he is managing to control who you see and where you go... Imagine how controlling he'd be if you actually lived in the same house as him.

Why has he no friends? And how is that your problem, from a distance? Why does him not being able to go out mean you can't to out? If he wants to make friends that's up to him. You're not his mother. You don't have to ring up someone else's mammy and ask will they come over to play.

Honestly, OP, he is an adult (I assume) man. You mention he goes to town with his family, so is he living in his home place? Its up to him to seek out places to go and people to see. If you are changing yourself into something you are not happy with for someone else then its time to look at what's going on.

Make contact with your friends. Go out with them. If he sulks, so what? He'll get over it. If he doesn't get over it he'll dump you and you'll know that you escaped a life of misery, with him dragging you down.

Kidchameleon

Dump his ass and ignore his texts. Do you really love him? I doubt it...

zoobizoo

What do you love about him exactly?

LDRs are tough but when you're made feel guilty about enjoying yourself, it's time to call it quits.

His lack of ability to make friends and socialise shouldn't impact on you negatively.

Demanding that you stay in touch while you;re out is beyond normal.

beefburrito

He'll end up gaslighting you next, run Lola run....keep on running...

If you have to block his number, because he'll probably try doing that make you feel guilty and it's all your fault...

Over the hills and far away, I've been there....

runningbuddy

His lack of ability to make friends is quite telling to be honest OP.

justfillmein

you said you were out with your class so i'm presuming you are a bit younger. therefore so is this boy.

if you want to break up with him, maybe explain to him clearly why you want this, before you walk away.
he needs to know why it went wrong so that he can learn from it.

it might be his first relationship and he might not realize how his acting like this is ruining his relationship.
you have every right to walk away, but try clear the air first and help him understand whats not acceptable in a relationship.

good luck with it

Anne1982h

You are in an emotionally abusive relationship. You will find someone else more deserving of your love. Break up with him then immediately remove and block him from all social media and your phone. Cold turkey is the only way with emotionally manipulative people. Ask to meet up with your friends and apologize for distancing yourself from them. Spend time with good family and friends and look after yourself. It will be hard at first but it needs to be done.

Sephiroth_dude

Glenpatrick2 wrote: »

nothing without me and that I'm the only person he talks to.. and that he's sorry.

That's manipulation, this is not a healthy relationship, you sound extremely miserable, break up with him, I wouldn't even bother doing it face to face, send him a text saying you're not happy and you need to end the relationship and block him everywhere.

Airyfairy12

Ive been in your situation. Leave him, youre not responsible for anybody but yourself. The sooner you get out the better.

orthsquel

It sounds like a very unhealthy, codependent relationship with emotional abusive undertones.

Is he in college, working? Him not having friends is not your problem. He needs to build a life of his own, find friends, not waiting for your next text or arranging video chats when it suits. He should be encouraged to make practical changes to his life in getting out and meeting people, rather than relying on you for communication and someone to spend time with. There needs to be more in and to his life than it revolving around a relationship.

You need to have your own life, friends and enjoy bonding with your classmates. You can't be available 24/7 on a phone to someone at the drop of the hat by any medium - you need your space as a person to enjoy living your own life.

It also sounds like he may not be in a very positive place in his life, but it is his responsibility to do something to change that, not yours, but you can encourage him to make positive changes.

I'd agree that if you want to break up with him, give him the reason why so he can learn from it.

What you should do for you is give your best friend a call, arrange to meet over the weekend, go for a coffee and have a long chat, catch up with them and explain what's been going on and catch up with what's been going on in their lives, and apologise for keeping your distance.