Let’s invent a new form of transport

Ajsoprano

Buses and trains and stuff are poop. Surely in this day and age all main routes into town should have a ladder instead of a bus stop and you could just climb it and slide into town. It’d be way cheaper to run than buses.

What would you build for your commute if you were the greatest minister for transport ever?

Beasty

A bike path between my house and work with all other traffic required to give way...

frag420

A laser guided human canon!

Jim Bob Scratcher

jaxxx

Teleporters!

Yes this would put all the bus/train/air/sea companies out of business but... think of the savings the average person would make as well as the massive environmental benefits!

riffmongous

jaxxx wrote: »

Teleporters!

Yes this would put all the bus/train/air/sea companies out of business but... think of the savings the average person would make as well as the massive environmental benefits!

But you won't be able to enjoy the benefits as the teleporter essentially kills the original you. There is no transfer of consciousness, only a recreation

Archeron

Fart powered personal blimps. The amount of wind I expel, I could run a bus service for the neighborhood.

Harry Palmr

Solar powered levitating Segways!

D Trent

Ajsoprano wrote: »

Buses and trains and stuff are poop. Surely in this day and age all main routes into town should have a ladder instead of a bus stop and you could just climb it and slide into town. It’d be way cheaper to run than buses.

What would you build for your commute if you were the greatest minister for transport ever?

Minister Ross I won't say it again, piss off scabbing off our ideas and do what's in your remit, either that or hand it over to someone who is competent. Thanx hun

Edit: opening garda stations is not within your remit

Donald Trump

jaxxx wrote: »

Teleporters!

I'll sell you a teleporter

buried

Rocket Thruster's underneath my shoe soles please.

Nuke Air Jordans. Just Flew It.

Donald Trump

buried wrote: »

Rocket Thruster's underneath my shoe soles please.

Nuke Air Jordans. Just Flew It.

I wouldn't trust ya with a pair of Heelies

ytpe2r5bxkn0c1

Network of conveyor belt.

mojesius

Jetpacks. I'm thinking Hybrid/EV jetpacks for the environment and to prevent the government taxing the bejaysus out of jetpack users.

Part of the jetpack driving test would identify and eliminate skangers and those with convictions and/or driving offences from using or owning them. After all, we don't want flying nakers or Mr BMW with 9 penalty points flying around with his road rage.

While these measures will somewhat reduce the number of jetpack incidents, inevitably many jetpack users will crash into each other and die in congested areas and during rush hour, but we should think of this as 'natural selection/trimming the herd' in an era of overpopulation.

Also, we could use rivers and canals for the aquajetpacker and create organised 'flyways' in the sky for those commuting from the suburbs. And some jetpack users could use the roads (jetpacks on wheels) as we won't have thousands of single commuters in 4people cars clogging the roads anymore.

RiderOnTheStorm

Adalyn Powerful Meteoroid wrote:

Network of conveyor belt.

Exactly what I was thinking. They could have little seats like horizontal ski lifts.

Ajsoprano

RiderOnTheStorm wrote: »

Exactly what I was thinking. They could have little seats like horizontal ski lifts.

You could have Conan the Barbarian powering it by pushing a massive wheel in a circle like in that film Conan the barbarian.

Your Face

Clem Fandango

Punctual busses amirite?

magentis

Beasty wrote: »

A bike path between my house and work with all other traffic required to give way...

In fairness cyclists act like that is the case anyway.

jacksie66

This post has been deleted.

Middle Man

Video by basiling Mr:

An automated rail transit system like this would be great for Dublin!

fergus1001

We need a monorail Simpsons style

LadyMacBeth_

Magic carpet ftw.

jaxxx

LadyMacBeth_ wrote: »

Magic carpet ftw.

LadyMacbeth wants to show people the world

#Nostalgia

#... Just remembered they're going ruining it all by making a live action just like they're doing with the rest of the classics! Grrr :mad:

Mountainsandh

Dragons ! Ecofriendly, fast, flexible, stylish. I'm taking toothless.

jaxxx

Mountainsandh wrote: »

Dragons ! Ecofriendly, fast, flexible, stylish. I'm taking toothless.

Dragons have it. All the nays can kindly go away, you're ideas are not wanted

kneemos

Space Hopper.

Imagine the good mood everyone would be in.

CM24

If they replaced all the regular footpaths with those moving travelator things they have in airports...

jaxxx

CM24 wrote: »

If they replaced all the regular footpaths with those moving travelator things they have in airports...

I foresee problems with that.

Badly Drunk Boy

Your Face wrote: »

Clem Fandango

I can't hear you.

AllForIt

I've been drawing up some plans...

Capt'n Midnight

Mountainsandh wrote: »

Dragons ! Ecofriendly, fast, flexible, stylish. I'm taking toothless.

Biodegradable but have a huge carbon footprint.

Mountainsandh

Capt'n Midnight wrote: »

Biodegradable but have a huge carbon footprint.

Only if you get on their nerves !

Mr.Crinklewood

Massive homing pigeons.

maudgonner

Let's go back to the olden days when we all used horses to get around. Except there probably aren't enough horses in the country to carry everyone. We've got plenty of cows though, so use them instead. And have an app that lets you order a cow to come and pick you up whenever you need it...

..we'll call it Moo-ber.

Greentopia

I'd settle for lots more bike paths everywhere like the Netherlands. Failing that I'll go with dragons too if I can get a fire breathing one and nuke anyone parking their car on a bike lane with the command "Dracarys!"

LadyMacBeth_

maudgonner wrote: »

Let's go back to the olden days when we all used horses to get around. Except there probably aren't enough horses in the country to carry everyone. We've got plenty of cows though, so use them instead. And have an app that lets you order a cow to come and pick you up whenever you need it...

..we'll call it Moo-ber.

This made me laugh out loud, moo-ber

magick

Bring back Airships!

KyussB

We'll use all the poor people to give us piggybacks, with spurs and whips - solve unemployment and the transport problem in one go - with a nice dash of morally righteous bashing upon the poor, for being poor, since people won't be able to bash dole scroungers anymore.

dr.fuzzenstein

It has been invented in the 70's in Germany

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERdF0FK-2io

maudgonner

LadyMacBeth_ wrote: »

This made me laugh out loud, moo-ber

Wait till you hear about my idea for a spin-off: Boob-er. I haven't figured out all the details but I think it will involve motorboats.

Ubbquittious

greencap

Spirewire.



A very high spire type building located in each suburb.

There's a couple of elevators inside. You go up the spire, then take a pod and zipline down to a station. At about a 45° angle.


Ski-lift network. Dual function lamp posts support a network of ski lift wires. The wire is kept rotating at a power station at both/either ends.

You just get yourself to an open air pod post, a bit like the public bike stations, rent a pod - essentially a ski lift seat with a windscreen, and hook it up, and off you go, looking down on the motorway from the height of present day roadside lights.

It goes around 30kmph, there's a timer system so your pod smoothly joins the wire without interruption. Also there is a vending machine on site where you can buy raisin and biscuit yorkies, and not the boring blue ones.

Individual train pod - like the ski-lift network but making use of the already present rail line network, trains as we know them are gone, instead you go to the ex-train station where a mechanical lifting arm lowers individual pods onto the train line. The pods use only one section/half of the train track line as we know them. The pods can be single, two, or maybe even three capacity, in line seating rather than side by side. They're a bit like having a motorbike perfectly balanced on a single rail. But with a windshield.
They're onboard electrically powered. A computer system calculates when a pod may join the rail. Single speed. Monitored from a control center. There are small cancellation/emergency stops along the way. These are semi circular, adjoining the rail, a vending machine with raisin and biscuit yorkies, and starbars, among other snacks is located at each emergency stop. There are no blue yorkies in these vending machines.

Capt'n Midnight

maudgonner wrote: »

Let's go back to the olden days when we all used horses to get around.

Slight problem with the amount of fertilizer they leave behind though.

burnsey1987

Driving around in heavy machinery, on roads built entirely out of brand shiny new self-driving cars.

*rubs hands together and starts licking lips at the thought of a Soviet ICBM launcher vs a Google autonomous car