Need help

LegacyUser

Hi
I need help with this. I know ultimately it's up to me but o just dunno what to do any more.. and I just feel so alone. I have been trying to lose weight for years. I've been up and down. I've tried everything. But it always creeps back on. I know that the better thing to do is just create new lifestyle habits, not restrict, eat mindfully etc etc.. but I just don't do it. I eat a lot of junk, nd while I exercise a lot.. obviously the junk counteracts the calories burnt through exercise. I just feel like I CAN'T give it up.. I honestly feel addicted to it sometimes.. it's consuming my thoughts every day.. whether or not to have that bar..or to have that muffin or whatever.. I'm sick of it. So sick of it. I just want to be healthy.. I want to eat normally and not binge. But I don't even know what normal is any more. I am in therapy for it.. but I just dunno what to do any more.. Like I go to bed each day thinking ok tomorrow I'll eat better and make better choices but by midday they are out the window.. help!!

Forget dieting. Let go of the value of thinness. Imagine accepting yourself at any size. Start the journey of learning to really genuinely love and appreciate your body. The eating habits will only right themselves when you can separate them from the desperate need you feel to be thin.

Don't self criticise anymore. Don't beat yourself up. Aim to eat three meals a day and three snacks and don't restrict. If you want to binge ask yourself what feelings are bringing it on. If you binge, forgive yourself and accept yourself.

The food behaviours are only a symptom of other issues. Let go of the sense of desperation. You are good and acceptable as you are, no matter what your weight. Don't diet, don't restrict, don't over do it on exercise. Rest when you're tired. Learn treats that aren't about food - take up hobbies that give you joy and surround yourself with comforts that have nothing to do with food, like scented candles and warm blankets. Learn to soothe yourself in new ways.

It will take a long time but you can do it.

Remember this: you cannot solve an eating disorder with a diet so ignore any toxic advice that is around a new way to eat.

Instead focus on the mental and emotional needs you have and feed those.

Good luck.

LegacyUser

I have found the LoseIt subreddit over on reddit.com to be an immense help for me in losing weight and fostering better eating habits and my relationship with food.

Lots of similar people going through the same stuff. I don't post, just lurk, and have found it a great resource.

Maybe check it out. There is a page for first time posters with FAQs which is helpful, and then you can just read through the threads. There are so many people going through exactly what you are right now. It's great to know you are not alone, and there is lots of good advice.

It is Reddit after all though, so do take some of what's said with a pinch of salt, but the support there is great.

https://www.reddit.com/r/loseit/

zoobizoo

What exercise are you doing?

Koala Sunshine

Needhelp9647o wrote: »

Hi
I need help with this. I know ultimately it's up to me but o just dunno what to do any more.. and I just feel so alone. I have been trying to lose weight for years. I've been up and down. I've tried everything. But it always creeps back on. I know that the better thing to do is just create new lifestyle habits, not restrict, eat mindfully etc etc.. but I just don't do it. I eat a lot of junk, nd while I exercise a lot.. obviously the junk counteracts the calories burnt through exercise. I just feel like I CAN'T give it up.. I honestly feel addicted to it sometimes.. it's consuming my thoughts every day.. whether or not to have that bar..or to have that muffin or whatever.. I'm sick of it. So sick of it. I just want to be healthy.. I want to eat normally and not binge. But I don't even know what normal is any more. I am in therapy for it.. but I just dunno what to do any more.. Like I go to bed each day thinking ok tomorrow I'll eat better and make better choices but by midday they are out the window.. help!!

Try meditation. I think people often over stimulate themselves as a distraction from themselves. Do you accept yourself, the thoughts that enter your head, the emotions you feel, your desires, do you accept yourself without guilt or shame?

Ajsoprano

What makes you binge.

tara73

Did you ever try joining a group? I only know weight watchers and never had any connections with them but why not try it? Or probably there are other groups these days which are much better?

I think it's always a good idea not being on your own with such a problem, managing it with the support of others who have the same problems.

Believe in yourself, you will make it!!

LegacyUser

Hi OP,

Do you drink fizzy drinks or diet fizzy drinks/flavoured water/tea or coffee with sugar? This would be the first thing I would look at. If you start drinking water instead of any of these, this is a simple way of cutting added calories on a daily basis. Also, keeping hydrated can keep hunger at bay after eating.

I really sympathise with your situation because there are so many people offering false information on weight loss tips and secret ways of losing weight that are complete rubbish that you need to be really careful i.e. juicing, eating certain kinds of berries, drinking shakes etc. These are all waffle and looking for you to buy their product that will not help you lose any weight leaving you more disillusioned. I would highly recommend reading the nutrition 101 thread on boards to properly educate yourself on what's involved in a healthy diet.

sassyj

1 on 1 sessions with a qualified dietician, accountability and qualified nutritional advice all in one. Proper life changing stuff. Slimming groups work for some, but recidivism rates reportedly run at 97%, and the fact they sell such crap food says it all. Cost of dietician in long run cheaper also

Chances are the OP knows how to lose weight. Advice on weight loss will genuinely not help.

Learning to accept and love yourself, meditation as suggested, taking the focus off diet and onto mental and emotional well-being will give you enormous relief.

Gentle exercise and permission to be yourself and permission to eat will help.

PS Slimming groups are a terrible idea for people with disordered eating, they only make things worse

LolaJJ

Yea, this is really within your control. You just need to go one day at a time.

Just say "I'm going to eat healthy today only" and don't get hung up on waiting for progress. Just eat healthy because it's the right thing to do to respect your body.

Also, have a look at Over-Eaters Anon and Eating Disorders anon. They are both really good resources x