Wedding of Muslim man and Catholic woman

Msweeney123

I have just recently got engaged and have a few questions surrounding the actual marriage.
I am an Irish catholic marrying a tunisian Muslim and we will get married in Tunisia in the Summer. First of all we will be married under Islamic law where the Imam will carry out his duties. Am I still recognised as Catholic eventhough I'm married under this law.
Secondly the following day we want a sand ceremony with vows and I want my friend to conduct this. It will be non religious or lawful.
Thirdly when I return to Ireland with my husband to be I would like a Catholic blessing by a priest.
Can anyone help me and advise if all of this is possible?

Faith

Mod note: Moved from sponsored forum.

However, you have very very specific questions but I’m not sure there’s a more appropriate forum, given the cross-religious element.

tedpan

Msweeney123 wrote:

I have just recently got engaged and have a few questions surrounding the actual marriage. I am an Irish catholic marrying a tunisian Muslim and we will get married in Tunisia in the Summer. First of all we will be married under Islamic law where the Imam will carry out his duties. Am I still recognised as Catholic eventhough I'm married under this law. Secondly the following day we want a sand ceremony with vows and I want my friend to conduct this. It will be non religious or lawful. Thirdly when I return to Ireland with my husband to be I would like a Catholic blessing by a priest. Can anyone help me and advise if all of this is possible?

You want quite a lot... Talk to your priest, he'll be able to confirm your Catholic concerns.

I am Catholic, wife is Muslim. We got married in a registry office in Dublin and forgot about all the religious jive..

uck51js9zml2yt

What about your kids. He will probably want them to be Muslim.
If they are girls , they will probably have to wear a veil of some sort once old enough.

I've friends, she's RC, he's Muslim and the kids are brought up Muslim.

January

I doubt a priest will do a Catholic blessing unless both participants are actually Catholic.

judeboy101

Have a very quick very quiet civil ceremony here first, consider it an insurance policy.

Mrs OBumble

January wrote: »

I doubt a priest will do a Catholic blessing unless both participants are actually Catholic.

Most will.

qwerty13

So will you be legally married under Irish law?

Channel 4 had a programme a while back about Muslim weddings in the UK - I can’t remember all of it, but I think the gist was that the Muslim wedding ceremony is purely a religious one, and that the wedding would have to registered separately in order to be legally recognised in the UK. The reason they covered it was that was common enough for people who had a Muslim wedding ceremony to think that they were considered legally married under UK law, but this wasn’t automatically the case - and led to a lot of problems if they split up, as they didn’t have the protection of divorce legislation.

I’m not sure if/how that translates to an Irish situation, but worth considering I think.

ETA: I didn’t mean to be a downer re possible divorce or anything, but whether your marriage is legally recognised also has very serious impacts re inheritance tax, and next of kin rights.

http://www.channel4.com/programmes/the-truth-about-muslim-marriage

splinter65

OP it doesn’t seem to me that you will be legally married at all despite going through 2 ceremonies, and you will definitley not be married in the eyes of the Catholic Church, if that is important to you.
There is nothing legally binding about any of the arrangements you have described so you need to be aware of that.
Others have said you should have a quick legal ceremony here before you leave.
Have you discussed that?
It’s not expensive.

Peregrinus

Msweeney123 wrote: »

I have just recently got engaged and have a few questions surrounding the actual marriage.
I am an Irish catholic marrying a tunisian Muslim and we will get married in Tunisia in the Summer. First of all we will be married under Islamic law where the Imam will carry out his duties. Am I still recognised as Catholic eventhough I'm married under this law.

As a Catholic, the Catholic church requires you either to marry in a Catholic ceremony, or to get a dispensation from this obligation. If you marry in a non-Catholic ceremony without a dispensation, the Catholic church will take the view that this is not a valid marriage.

You should approach your parish priest about getting a dispensation. You can get one routinely if you are marrying in another Christian denomination, but I don't know what the policy or practice is with regard to getting married in a non-Christian religion.

Msweeney123 wrote: »

Thirdly when I return to Ireland with my husband to be I would like a Catholic blessing by a priest.

You can discuss this at the same time as talking to them about a dispensation.

SFAIK, a purely religious marriage ceremony is not legally valid under Tunisian law - just like in France, Tunisians need to get married in the town hall and then have a religious ceremony afterwards, if they want one. So, as splinter65 says, a Muslim ceremony in Tunisia followed by a sand ceremony followed by a Catholic blessing in Ireland won't result in a legally-recognised wedding.

Assuming you want to be legally married, there are two ways around this:

1. Add a civil marriage ceremony, either in Tunisia or in Ireland, into the mix.

2. Instead of seeking a Catholic church dispensation to be married in a Muslim ceremony, followed by a church blessing, consider seeking a full church wedding in Ireland (which will be legally recognised) on the basis that the Muslim ceremony is unrecognised.

love_love

Msweeney123 wrote: »

I have just recently got engaged and have a few questions surrounding the actual marriage.
I am an Irish catholic marrying a tunisian Muslim and we will get married in Tunisia in the Summer. First of all we will be married under Islamic law where the Imam will carry out his duties. Am I still recognised as Catholic eventhough I'm married under this law.
Secondly the following day we want a sand ceremony with vows and I want my friend to conduct this. It will be non religious or lawful.
Thirdly when I return to Ireland with my husband to be I would like a Catholic blessing by a priest.
Can anyone help me and advise if all of this is possible?

My first point would be - why not ask your fiance these questions? He'd probably be best able to advise you, given his knowledge of his own religion and culture (which can be two very separate things). I have some knowledge over how things would work in Ireland, but if you're getting married in Tunisia, that's a whole separate question. You probably won't be "recognised as Catholic" (whatever that actually means), but the real question should probably be if it is essential for you to convert to Islam in order for them to agree to marry you. In Islam, it is my understanding that a non-Muslim partner does not have to convert as long as they are a member of a monotheistic religion. However, in certain cultures and countries (hence why it would be important to get specific info on how things work in Tunisia), you cannot legally marry a non-Muslim.

With regard to a blessing by a Catholic priest, my understanding is that it completely depends on the priest. I have heard, in the context of legal marriage rather than a simple "blessing", that some priests will refuse unless the couple are regular mass goers, others who want something signed to confirm that any children from the marriage will be brought up Catholic (same as Islam actually), and other priests who are happy to go ahead without any of those commitments. I imagine a blessing might be slightly easier, because you're not making the commitment under the church (maybe? idk), but as others have pointed out, since you won't actually be legally married by this third act, you might be better off looking to have the priest actually marry you rather than just a blessing.

Peregrinus

love_love wrote: »

My first point would be - why not ask your fiance these questions? He'd probably be best able to advise you, given his knowledge of his own religion and culture (which can be two very separate things). I have some knowledge over how things would work in Ireland, but if you're getting married in Tunisia, that's a whole separate question. You probably won't be "recognised as Catholic" (whatever that actually means), but the real question should probably be if it is essential for you to convert to Islam in order for them to agree to marry you. In Islam, it is my understanding that a non-Muslim partner does not have to convert as long as they are a member of a monotheistic religion. However, in certain cultures and countries (hence why it would be important to get specific info on how things work in Tunisia), you cannot legally marry a non-Muslim . . .

SFAIK this is not a problem in Tunisia. There used to be a ban on a Tunisian Muslim woman marrying a non-Muslim man, but that was abolished. The position now is that people of any religion are legally free to marry people of any religion.

You do, however, have to have a civil marriage ceremony; otherwise the marriage is not legally valid.

Neyite

January wrote: »

I doubt a priest will do a Catholic blessing unless both participants are actually Catholic.

They might, but it really depends on the priest. I know a few who would be fine with it. I also know a few that would not be!