Can someone take a gift back?

Babyspice13

My friend was getting rid of a TV 2 years ago. She text me and asked if I'd like it and she was giving me first refusal. I was delighted and took it. I even bought her a gift as thanks.

Roll on 2 years. We've had a falling out and she text to say she wants the tv back and she'll be over at the weekend to pick it up.

Can she take it back? There was no condition to the gift

Any advice would be appreciated

seamus

No. Unless there's a reason why either of you would genuinely believe it was a loan rather than a gift, then the TV is your property.

endacl

Feck.

Mr. Incognito

I'd give her the TV. Its at least two years old now. Dont give her an excuse and its no easy feat to lug a TV around. Let her at it I say.

Claw Hammer

seamus wrote: »

No. Unless there's a reason why either of you would genuinely believe it was a loan rather than a gift, then the TV is your property.

Not correct. Unless it was sold to the o/p, or the doctrine of advancement applies, then the o/p holds the TV on a resulting trust and the original person still owns it.
He could claim that he gave consideration for the TV thus creating a sale. I would tell her to piss off.

draiochtanois

This post has been deleted.

D3V!L

Put a nail through the center of the screen and tell her you were using it to hang photos.

Wildsurfer

Babyspice13 wrote: »

My friend was getting rid of a TV 2 years ago. She text me and asked if I'd like it and she was giving me first refusal. I was delighted and took it. I even bought her a gift as thanks.

Roll on 2 years. We've had a falling out and she text to say she wants the tv back and she'll be over at the weekend to pick it up.

Can she take it back? There was no condition to the gift

Any advice would be appreciated

Just tell her it broke in the intervening two years and you don't have it any more.

jimmycrackcorm

Don't bother giving it back. In reality what is she going to do, take you to the high court?

Peregrinus

Claw Hammer wrote: »

Not correct. Unless it was sold to the o/p, or the doctrine of advancement applies, then the o/p holds the TV on a resulting trust and the original person still owns it.

I think the circumstances outlined in the OP would easily displace any presumption of a resulting trust. The donor was "getting rid of a TV" . . . "asked if I'd like it" . . . "giving me first refusal" . . . "bought her a gift as thanks".

I don't think a court would have any difficulty concluding that this was a gift, intended and understood as such on both sides.

But this will never come to court. A second-hand TV does not have a value high enough to justify the time, effort and court fees involved.

OP, do not waste your emotional energy on this. Tell her she can have the TV; you'll leave it out for her to collect on a morning that she nominates. Do not mention your own reciprocal gift to her. Keep this exchange as short as possible. Shake the dust from your feet and go and buy a new TV; they are ludicrously cheap these days anyway.

the_syco

Babyspice13 wrote: »

Roll on 2 years. We've had a falling out and she text to say she wants the tv back and she'll be over at the weekend to pick it up.

Tell her you sold it.

Second Yellow

Tell her to have the gift or the price of it ready when she comes for the tv

K.Flyer

Peregrinus wrote: »

....
OP, do not waste your emotional energy on this. Tell her she can have the TV; you'll leave it out for her to collect on a morning that she nominates. Do not mention your own reciprocal gift to her. Keep this exchange as short as possible. Shake the dust from your feet and go and buy a new TV; they are ludicrously cheap these days anyway.

Only out of curiosity...
Given that the ex-friend is being so petty aboyrut things and wanting the tv back, if the O.P. was to follow this, would it be an acknowledgement that the TV was not a gift, but merely loaned to her, and by returning it could it then leave her open to her ex-friend trying to make claim against her for any possible damage / wear and tear that may have occurred over the two years.

Tell me how

Peregrinus wrote:

OP, do not waste your emotional energy on this. Tell her she can have the TV; you'll leave it out for her to collect on a morning that she nominates. Do not mention your own reciprocal gift to her. Keep this exchange as short as possible. Shake the dust from your feet and go and buy a new TV; they are ludicrously cheap these days anyway.

Why would the OP do this? Aside from just not wanting to cause trouble? That in itself is fine and so on, but, why should they?

OP, I'd tell them you are not going to return any tv. You don't need to explain why not.

Peregrinus

K.Flyer wrote: »

Only out of curiosity...
Given that the ex-friend is being so petty aboyrut things and wanting the tv back, if the O.P. was to follow this, would it be an acknowledgement that the TV was not a gift, but merely loaned to her, and by returning it could it then leave her open to her ex-friend trying to make claim against her for any possible damage / wear and tear that may have occurred over the two years.

As already pointed out, the value of the television does not justify court proceedings. Therefore, unless the ex-friend is psychotically insane, she would never pursue such a claim. (And, if she is psychotically insane, it hardly matters what the OP does; she will still be pursued.)

If really concerned about the possibility of a follow-up claim for damage to the television, I'd reply to the text asking for it back along these lines: "I understood the TV set was a gift. However if you want it I'm happy to gift it back to you. You can pick it up on Saturday morning. I'll probably be out, but I'll leave the set round the back, next to the bins." This negates any admission that the set was received on loan, or that giving it back amounts to the return of borrowed goods.

Peregrinus

Tell me how wrote: »

Why would the OP do this? Aside from just not wanting to cause trouble? That in itself is fine and so on, but, why should they?

Because it's the quickest and fullest way to bring an end to this, and saves time, frustration and emotional energy. Unless the OP cannot live without a television and cannot afford to replace this one, it's in the OP's best interests not to prolong this or leave it unresolved.

Give her back the television. Then she cannot nag you about it; she cannot nourish a sense of grievance and victimhood; she cannot bad-mouth you to others, etc. The sooner and more unconditionally you give her back the television, the sooner and more assuredly you get to this point, and the less the emotional cost to you of getting there.

shaunr68

Peregrinus wrote: »

Give her back the television

I would definitely be tempted to open up the telly case and leave a rancid poo inside. Then give it her back.

Tell me how

Peregrinus wrote:

Because it's the quickest and fullest way to bring an end to this, and saves time, frustration and emotional energy. Unless the OP cannot live without a television and cannot afford to replace this one, it's in the OP's best interests not to prolong this or leave it unresolved.

Give her back the television. Then she cannot nag you about it; she cannot nourish a sense of grievance and victimhood; she cannot bad-mouth you to others, etc. The sooner and more unconditionally you give her back the television, the sooner and more assuredly you get to this point, and the less the emotional cost to you of getting there.

No need. Just block and walk away.

I know we're only hearing one side here, but based on what I've heard, the original tv owner has no claim to it in my view.

Peregrinus

Tell me how wrote: »

No need. Just block and walk away.

I know we're only hearing one side here, but based on what I've heard, the original tv owner has no claim to it in my view.

Oh, I agree. But it would be worth junking a dozen televisions simply to have the pleasure of never having to deal with, speak to, respond to or think of the original owner again, and of giving her no conceivable, colourable, spurious cause for complaint. grievance or resentment.

The key thing to remember her is that this isn't about a television set; it's about a friendship that's gone toxic. The primary objective here is not to keep the television set, but to escape from the toxicity.

Give her what she thinks she wants and move on. You'll be the winner.

Sue Pa Key Pa

Give back the TV and delete her number from your phone.

flatty

Tell me how wrote: »

Peregrinus wrote:

OP, do not waste your emotional energy on this. Tell her she can have the TV; you'll leave it out for her to collect on a morning that she nominates. Do not mention your own reciprocal gift to her. Keep this exchange as short as possible. Shake the dust from your feet and go and buy a new TV; they are ludicrously cheap these days anyway.

Why would the OP do this? Aside from just not wanting to cause trouble? That in itself is fine and so on, but, why should they?

OP, I'd tell them you are not going to return any tv. You don't need to explain why not.

Because it's the sensible thing to do.

rock22

Peregrinus wrote: »

Oh, I agree. But it would be worth junking a dozen televisions simply to have the pleasure of never having to deal with, speak to, respond to or think of the original owner again, and of giving her no conceivable, colourable, spurious cause for complaint. grievance or resentment.

The key thing to remember her is that this isn't about a television set; it's about a friendship that's gone toxic. The primary objective here is not to keep the television set, but to escape from the toxicity.

Give her what she thinks she wants and move on. You'll be the winner.

I would strongly urge the OP to follow this, and the other, advice from Peregrinus.

Also ask yourself, would you really enjoy having the TV no that you know the "friend" no longer wants you to have.

Strongly agree that by giving the TV back you will be the winner.

sbsquarepants

Babyspice13 wrote: »

My friend was getting rid of a TV 2 years ago. She text me and asked if I'd like it and she was giving me first refusal. I was delighted and took it. I even bought her a gift as thanks.

Roll on 2 years. We've had a falling out and she text to say she wants the tv back and she'll be over at the weekend to pick it up.

Can she take it back? There was no condition to the gift

Any advice would be appreciated

Jaysus, this doesn't bode well for the reunion tour next year:)

exaisle

Leave the tv outside your door at the appointed time for her to collect. With a jar of vaseline on top.

D.J.

As somebody already mentioned, we heard only one side of this story. And from that, it doesn't sound fair that you should return that TV. However, it is probably the most reasonable thing to do. That way you'll cut clean the relationship with your ex-friend and continue with your normal life - look forward, not backwards.

I would also follow advices in regards to sending a suggested text message to protect yourself from any potential problems in regards to wear and tear of that telly during the last two years. It most likely won't be the needed, but one can never be sure, I guess, so it's best to protect yourself.

Thoie

Peregrinus wrote: »

Oh, I agree. But it would be worth junking a dozen televisions simply to have the pleasure of never having to deal with, speak to, respond to or think of the original owner again, and of giving her no conceivable, colourable, spurious cause for complaint. grievance or resentment.

The key thing to remember her is that this isn't about a television set; it's about a friendship that's gone toxic. The primary objective here is not to keep the television set, but to escape from the toxicity.

Give her what she thinks she wants and move on. You'll be the winner.

Peregrinus is on the ball. Dust it down well, carefully coil the cables, wrap it in a bin liner, even offer to help carry it to the car. Then close the door and block her number. She's toxic, and you're better off without her. If that means being without the telly too, it will be worth it in the long run. Don't engage in any other conversation other than "do you need a hand to carry it to the car?" (which puts you on the moral high ground).

She sounds like the kind of person who'll try to get a rise out of you, so be prepared for that and don't respond.

NUTLEY BOY

Give it back in your presence. Don't leave it for collection as third party interference might occur thus frustrating it's return.

Better if you have a mate to witness the return to put that aspect of matters beyond dispute.

Get same said mate to observe that the TV was in working order just before return.

Finally, take the batteries out of the remote control and replace them with two flat ones thus having the last word in dignified silence....;)

delboythedub

Babyspice13 wrote:

Roll on 2 years. We've had a falling out and she text to say she wants the tv back and she'll be over at the weekend to pick it up.

"Indian giver"

Claw Hammer

Peregrinus wrote: »

I think the circumstances outlined in the OP would easily displace any presumption of a resulting trust. The donor was "getting rid of a TV" . . . "asked if I'd like it" . . . "giving me first refusal" . . . "bought her a gift as thanks".

I don't think a court would have any difficulty concluding that this was a gift, intended and understood as such on both sides.

.

A gift causes a resulting trust Proving it was a gift would be against the o/p,s interests. The o/p should claim that he gave consideration for the TV by way of removing rubbish. He effectively bought the TV from the previous owner. Obviously it is not going to go to court. The o/p can say he will give back the TV when the storage charges are paid.

Peregrinus

Claw Hammer wrote: »

A gift causes a resulting trust . . .

No. A gift is an outright and absolute transfer; the transferor retains no beneficial interest in the property given. If the transferor does retain a beneficial interest, whether expliciltly, implicitly or by construction, that's not a gift but a settlement upon trust.