Proper form of address

Permabear

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Toots

I'd imagine so. Or you could just put X&Y Secondname. Is it for the actual invitation or just the envelope?

moceri

Permabear wrote: »

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https://www.proz.com/kudoz/English/general_conversation_greetings_letters/5170897-the_female_form_of_messrs.html

Mmes., although this could seem formal in use.

Permabear

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looksee

Have they both adopted one surname? I think that. starting from people living together without getting married, and women not adopting their spouse's surname, all the rules have been thrown out of the window. I would be inclined to address it to Jane and Joan Murphy, or Jane Smith and Joan Murphy. I agree that Mrs and Mrs looks odd, though maybe lesbian couples would prefer it, in that case go with it. Increasingly Mr and Mrs or Ms are being dropped when addressing letters (letter, what's a letter? ) so there is a precedent for it.

Permabear

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Permabear

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looksee

Good point, but the pedant in me would prefer 'the misses Smith'. But then you can't really say 'the missises Smith. Mesdames possibly? I don't think it matters too much really, but you know what...you could always pick up the phone and ask them

looksee

There ye go: http://www.formsofaddress.info/Same_Sex_Couple.html

Permabear

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Permabear

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Permabear

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Creol1

My own rule is that I would only use "Mrs" if the married woman has taken her husband's surname. If a woman has married but retains her maiden name, it's a bit of a grey area; "Ms" offers the easy way out, but if we're being old-school and choosing between "Miss/Mrs", I would say "Miss" would probably be preferable as it signifies a woman is using her maiden name.

My suggestion would be to throw formality out the window and just address the lesbian couple by their first names. That might be inconsistent if you're addressing other couples more formally but they're hardly going to go around comparing their invitations for consistency.

By the way, the standard (insofar as there is one) on this side of the Atlantic is to omit the full stop and say Mr, Miss, Ms, Mrs whereas in the US they would use Mr., Miss, Ms. and Mrs.; practice varies, but if you read a UK or Irish newspaper, omitting the full stop tends to be the practice, and I prefer it because it looks neater.

Permabear

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