Opinions please and thanks

remembering

Ok I'd like a few opinions on this please!

I was out yesterday in the pub with my boyfriend and we had finished our dinner and a few people came and sat near us. One of the girls wanted some ketchup so she called the waitress over so I obviously heard because we were sitting very near them so I just had a quick look in our bowl to see if we had any and then my boyfriend goes 'why do you always do this - it's none of your business - let the waitress get it for her and they will think we were listening into their conversation etc which I wasn't but as I said we were beside them. Did he over react or was i interfering? I feel stupid even posting this but we are still not talking!!! Ps - the waitress never did come back with the ketchup!!!

listermint

He obviously feels embarrassed because you nose in on other people's conversations. It appears to be a trend going on yours posts.

Do you do this often?

remembering

listermint wrote: »

He obviously feels embarrassed because you nose in on other people's conversations. It appears to be a trend going on yours posts.

Do you do this often?

I don't but I just didn't think I was in the wrong but I obviously am!

lazybones32

Nothing wrong with being helpful but something seems off when a person is too keen to help, even when they haven't been asked.
Boundaries are a good thing as is setting limits to your generous and giving nature; esp in interactions with strangers.

remembering

lazybones32 wrote: »

Nothing wrong with being helpful but something seems off when a person is too keen to help, even when they haven't been asked.
Boundaries are a good thing as is setting limits to your generous and giving nature; esp in interactions with strangers.

How do you mean something seems off?

Thanks for reply

messy tessy

I mean it was a conversation about ketchup...hardly eavesdropping on really private stuff here! Is there anything else going on with you two? Seems a bit mad to be getting annoyed with someone over looking for ketchup!

retro:electro

If it was a once off- fine. But the fact he said "you always do this" makes me think you have a habit of eavesdropping into the utterings of those beside you and it's annoying your partner.

Ursus Horribilis

OP, are you still with the guy who you posted about at the start of the year? https://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2057688782

Ursus Horribilis

I'm going to assume your silence means it is the same guy from that thread. In light of what you told us back then, I don't know what else you could expect here. This guy has told you - through his many acts and words - that he is an unpleasant, controlling, abusive partner. The ketchup incident is a ridiculous reason for a big falling out. But in the grand scale of things it's yet another symptom of a bigger problem.

I have a horrible feeling that you never called Women's Aid. That you went ahead and bought a house with him. That you ignored every single word of advice that you were given here on Boards. I bet this weekend's incident isn't an isolated one either. And it will be just one in a long line of future misdemeanours. Because you have no intention of ending this relationship, do you?

Airyfairy12

I dont think you did anything wrong. You were only trying to help. If I was the stranger though I think id feel uncomfortable taking someone elses used bowl of ketchup and then the awkwardness of feeling like the next table is listening to everything im saying. I suppose I can see it from both sides but it's not worth fighting over... I know couples fight over silly things sometimes but this seems a bit over the top. Do you usually argue over such petty things? thats not a good sign for a relationship.

Ursus Horribilis

You really should read her original thread.

qwerty13

I’d find it quite odd if someone a table next to me offered me ketchup after I’d asked the waitress. It comes across like you were listening in to their conversation, which is rude - no matter how near the tables were, there’s no need for you to make them uncomfortable by highlighting the fact that you have been listening in.

It also comes across as rude to whoever you’re with, that you’re not paying attention to them, and are listening in to others around you instead. Tbh I’d find it quite annoying if it was a habit of yours.

amtc

I would've thought it was annoying too, and odd. But then I read the original thread.