Neighbour rang guards

OkeyDoke12

Aware I was in the wrong

gooseygander

No. For all your neighbour knew you may have been beating the crap out of your partner or even child. Domestic violence is rife. Garda were called, checked it out and were satisfied when you explained the situation. No harm done, maybe have a chat with neighbor about them calling and move on.

realdanbreen

OkeyDoke12 wrote: »

Moved into an semi detached house last week with my partner and our 2 year old daughter. Last night she woke up hysterical and would not go back to sleep. (1st time it's happened in a long term certainly hasn't happened since we moved in to this house) anyway myself and my partner shouted at our daughter and warned her she would be going on the naughty step. After 10 mins she calmed down and we all went back to sleep. Hour or so later the door rapped and it was 2 guards saying that people were passing and heard shouting and a commotion. As I said the house is semi detached in a quiet area and a good distance away from footpath so realistally it was my neighbor who rang the guards.

Am I entitiled to be a bit annoyed by this? As I said my daughters tantrum coupled with a bit of shouting only lasted 10 mins

You and your partner think shouting at a 2 year old is the way to do things?

lawred2

Shouting at a two year old loud enough for the neighbours to get concerned?

jesus christ

the only tantrums I see in that story were those of you two parents

degsie

Be thankful you have concerned neighbours. As mentioned, maybe have a word and move on.

CeilingFly

lawred2 wrote: »

Shouting at a two year old loud enough for the neighbours to get concerned?

jesus christ

the only tantrums I see in that story was that of you two parents

paper thin walls in semi-detached house. At nightime when noise travels easier due to atmospheric conditions even a regular argument can sound far louder than it is.

For the OP - if you own the house, get the party wall sound proofed.

With the neighbour - maybe mention that the kid is having difficulty sleeping and is prone to tantrums now and again (called the terrible twos) and if it disturbs them, you apologise in advance and that the doctor assures you it is a temporary condition and prevalent in many two year olds.

Also beware giving a generalistation of public forums - you say you shouted, some people will exaggerate that and think you were roaring the house down. Those people don't have children and think having children is the stuff of fairytales and bliss.

ArthurG

OkeyDoke12 wrote: »

Am I entitiled to be a bit annoyed by this?

Why on earth do you need to ask?. If you're annoyed, then you're annoyed. You don't need to validate it by asking a load of randomers on the internet.

For every response you get telling you 'yes, it was out of order....', you'll have another suggesting you should be happy that your neighbours care enough to take action in the event something might have been wrong.

SteM

CeilingFly wrote: »

paper thin walls in semi-detached house. At nightime when noise travels easier due to atmospheric conditions even a regular argument can sound far louder than it is.

For the OP - if you own the house, get the party wall sound proofed.

With the neighbour - maybe mention that the kid is having difficulty sleeping and is prone to tantrums now and again (called the terrible twos) and if it disturbs them, you apologise in advance and that the doctor assures you it is a temporary condition and prevalent in many two year olds.

The guards were probably called because the adults in the house were shouting, not because the kid was having a tantrum.

lawred2

CeilingFly wrote: »

paper thin walls in semi-detached house. At nightime when noise travels easier due to atmospheric conditions even a regular argument can sound far louder than it is.

For the OP - if you own the house, get the party wall sound proofed.

With the neighbour - maybe mention that the kid is having difficulty sleeping and is prone to tantrums now and again (called the terrible twos) and if it disturbs them, you apologise in advance and that the doctor assures you it is a temporary condition and prevalent in many two year olds.

Also beware giving a generalistation of public forums - you say you shouted, some people will exaggerate that and think you were roaring the house down. Those people don't have children and think having children is the stuff of fairytales and bliss.

I have two boys under 4... and a third on the way. All in a semi-d.

lol at warning of generalizations.

CeilingFly

SteM wrote: »

The guards were probably called because the adults in the house were shouting, not because the kid was having a tantrum.

yes - and as I said paper thin walls in many semis and night time atmospheric conditions. A regular raised voice can sound a lot louder than it is.

Lets just say I'd never live in a semi detached house unless the party walls were properly sound insulated.

CeilingFly

lawred2 wrote: »

I have two boys under 4... and a third on the way. All in a semi-d.

lol at warning of generalizations.

and its bliss and you have never raised your voice - ever?

Maybe very lucky your kids didn't go through the terrible twos like many do.

Or maybe you are just the absolute perfect parent and life is utterly blissful.

Most people live in the REAL world.

Ann22

My son used to wake screaming in the night. His eyes would be open but blank. Think it was night terrors. What it like that? Or she have a nightmare?
I certainly wouldn't shout at her anyway ..my God!

lawred2

CeilingFly wrote: »

and its bliss and you have never raised your voice - ever?

Maybe very lucky your kids didn't go through the terrible twos like many do.

Or maybe you are just the absolute perfect parent and life is utterly blissful.

Most people live in the REAL world.

Yes. All those things.

ThisRegard

CeilingFly wrote: »

and its bliss and you have never raised your voice - ever?

Maybe very lucky your kids didn't go through the terrible twos like many do.

Or maybe you are just the absolute perfect parent and life is utterly blissful.

Most people live in the REAL world.

Without knowing the detailed situation, but based on the OP, two parents shouting at a 2 year old who wakes up hysterical is hardly the best way to calm a stressed child.

SteM

CeilingFly wrote: »

and its bliss and you have never raised your voice - ever?

Maybe very lucky your kids didn't go through the terrible twos like many do.

Or maybe you are just the absolute perfect parent and life is utterly blissful.

Most people live in the REAL world.

You keep mentioning the kid's terrible twos - it's the adults shouting at the kid while they were tantruming that caused the problem imo. The terrible twos might pass, the adults will still think it's okay to shout at a distressed kid in the middle of the night. I have a 5 years old and I can tell you it's not a way to parent, no matter how tired you feel.

brookers

That old naughty step thing is crazy, pick her up and tell her you love her and try your best to calm her down in a loving way, shouting, your neighbours were right, poor little girl....

mloc123

lawred2 wrote: »

Yes. All those things.

Hah.. spoken like a classic online 'mummy', your kids are always angels and you have never lost your cool. Sure.

Hooks Golf Handicap

lawred2 wrote: »

Shouting at a two year old loud enough for the neighbours to get concerned?

jesus christ

the only tantrums I see in that story were those of you two parents

Spoken like someone who was never a parent, or was lucky enough never to have a kid who knew where the line was & enjoyed stepping on it.

I've been in the same predicament as the OP many times & I'll make no excuse for shouting at 4 in the morning.

I know this may annoy you & your thanks sewing circle but I'm delighted your little princesses always have a full night sleep after 4 hours of art & crafts mindfulness & baking vegan cookies.

Unless you've walked in the OP's shoes your opinion is worth nothing.

lawred2

mloc123 wrote: »

Hah.. spoken like a classic online 'mummy', your kids are always angels and you have never lost your cool. Sure.

Or just a plain and simple fail to comprehend sarcasm.

lawred2

Hooks Golf Handicap wrote: »

Spoken like someone who was never a parent, or was lucky enough never to have a kid who knew where the line was & enjoyed stepping on it.

I've been in the same predicament as the OP many times & I'll make no excuse for shouting at 4 in the morning.

I know this may annoy you & your thanks sewing circle but I'm delighted your little princesses always have a full night sleep after 4 hours of art & crafts mindfulness & baking vegan cookies.

Unless you've walked in the OP's shoes your opinion is worth nothing.

I'm beginning to despair a little with these presumptions.

I've two boys that break our hearts on a daily basis.

This is about shouting at a two year old in distress in the dead of night. As if that's going to settle the child. Shouting so much that the neighbours feared for the safety of the child. If you think that that's within the realms of a normal parenting experience then maybe I am one of the lucky ones.

I doubt it though so... yeah - carry on waffling about walking in the OP's shoes.

Good grief. Such utter toss.

daheff

lawred2 wrote: »

This is about shouting at a two year old in distress in the dead of night.


As if that's going to settle the child.

OP never said the child was in distress. Said child was hysterical. there is a difference.

OP could provide a little more info on this point. Was the child having a tantrum because they were awake and bored, or did they wake up from a bad dream/night terrors??

Some kids need to be shown they are being bold (naughty step etc) to get them to stop acting up. Some are meek/very willing to please and do as told and dont need to be shown they are being bold.

lawred2 wrote: »

Shouting so much that the neighbours feared for the safety of the child. If you think that that's within the realms of a normal parenting experience then maybe I am one of the lucky ones.

How do you know the neighbours feared for the safety of the child? Maybe they were annoyed at the noise and wanted to have it stopped? You weren't a party to the conversation that was had with the guards so you are making a rather large assumption. Maybe they did tell the guards they were fearful for the child...to get them out...or maybe they said the neighbours were shouting around at 2 in the morning making a lot of noise and disturbing them.

I'd hope the guards would come a lot quicker than an hour or so later if they thought there was a child protection issue.

Hooks Golf Handicap

lawred2 wrote: »

This is about shouting at a two year old in distress in the dead of night. As if that's going to settle the child.

I didn't know the child was in distress, no no, that's a different situation.

I was referring to a kid that is messing at 4 in the morning just out of badness & is trying to wake it's siblings.
I enjoy shouting at those little feckers, might raise my hand too, but distress is an emotional thing & needs to be handled differently, agreed.

lawred2

daheff wrote: »

How do you know the neighbours feared for the safety of the child? Maybe they were annoyed at the noise and wanted to have it stopped? You weren't a party to the conversation that was had with the guards so you are making a rather large assumption. Maybe they did tell the guards they were fearful for the child...to get them out...or maybe they said the neighbours were shouting around at 2 in the morning making a lot of noise and disturbing them.

Fair point. I don't know that. That was a presumption on my part.

AnneFrank

Hooks Golf Handicap wrote: »

Spoken like someone who was never a parent, or was lucky enough never to have a kid who knew where the line was & enjoyed stepping on it.

I've been in the same predicament as the OP many times & I'll make no excuse for shouting at 4 in the morning.

I know this may annoy you & your thanks sewing circle but I'm delighted your little princesses always have a full night sleep after 4 hours of art & crafts mindfulness & baking vegan cookies.

Unless you've walked in the OP's shoes your opinion is worth nothing.

Monkey see monkey do, shout at a two year old and they will follow suit.
You can't reason with a two year old by shouting. I find your post bizarre, it's weak parenting.Simple as that.

Paulw

Mod Note: I think the OP has the information they required. If you want to talk about parenting, then go to the parenting forum.

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