Matchsticks.ie

LegacyUser

Hi everyone,

Has anyone used the services matchsticks.ie or similar companies, are they very expensive and are they worth the money?

I'm a 33 year old single man who's from the country but working in Dublin. Never been in an relationship before. Professionally everything is great thankfully, but life outside of work has just got a bit flat and I think it's time to find someone to try and get to know. I am involved in a couple of sports but never really connected with anyone - or wasn't brave enough to try asking - don't take rejection that well. Not a drinker or pub goer and that seems to reduce your chances in this country though.

Have come across people both online and at events that I would love to meet, but how you would make that happen without being thought of as some sort of weirdo I don't know.

Any advice appreciated, thanks!

Emme

Dublinsingle wrote: »

<Snip> No need to repost full post.

You're a 33 year old single man, any dating service would grab you! You should have no problem meeting women. Women are more likely to ask men out now so you might be coming across as standoffish or you're not picking up the signals. Join any meetup group and you will have your pick of single women.

woodchuck

Emme wrote: »

<Snip> No need to repost full post.

I'm sorry, but this post is a bit naïve...

I've never done matchsticks.ie, but I have used other free dating sites/apps in the past (tinder, okcupid, plenty of fish). One thing I'll say is that you need a VERY thick skin! This isn't just coming from me btw, I've heard it from a lot of people. If you have a fear of rejection, online dating may not be for you. A lot of people have a "kid in a candy shop" mentality, never willing to settle for what is in front of them, always looking for the next best thing etc. Never mind the timewasters just looking for an ego boost. Then of course there are people you click with online, but have no chemistry with in person. (I could go on all day about the pitfalls!)

Having said that, I did meet my current partner that way :P So it can and does work. Before you consider going down that route though, you need to be sure you're able to handle any rejection that comes your way. You do need take risks though if you're going to find someone!

Ciaran_B

Dublinsingle wrote: »

<Snip> No need to repost entire post.

I've not used matchsticks but I did use (and am currently using) Intro.ie and found them to be excellent.

I'm a little older than you but I'm also not a drinker or into pubs. I met loads of really nice women through Intro and had some great nights out. They're not cheap but I found a great service.

Emme

Ciaran_B wrote: »

<Snip> No need to repost full post.

Each one of the "loads of really nice women" has more than likely invested in Intro to find a serious relationship, not to meet men using it as a service providing an endless supply of women on a conveyor belt.

To be fair to you Intro probably have a very high ratio of women to men in your age bracket so it's in their interest to keep you signed up and sending you on dates with them. However please bear in mind that many of these women are looking for a serious relationship and when they meet you for a date they are hoping you might be the one.

Ciaran_B

Emme wrote: »

Each one of the "loads of really nice women" .............

Without wanting to derail the thread here but I totally understand that. And my investment of time and money with Intro was with the same goal - to meet someone serious. It's just not clicked with anyone yet.

LegacyUser

I've looked into matchsticks.ie and it seems it's €50 to have a talk with them which I suppose can't cause no harm, I think I've pretty much failed with online dating, never really got anything out of it.

Thanks for the help everyone :-)

Icepick

Your problem is lack of confidence (fear of rejection), no flirting and dating skills and no relationship experience. Think about what kind of women they can successfully match you with at the moment, if at all possible.

So that's what you need to work on and the rest will come with it. There are some good online resources, even on youtube (along with a lot of of pick-up "artist" crap).

littlevillage

As a veteran of the online dating scene, I have two pieces of advice.

1). Any service you are paying for, be very wary of it. Its in the interest of the service to keep you paying your subscription and it has been known for online dating services to use phantom profiles, professional daters and employees etc. to fulfil dates and keep subscribers from leaving.

2). Online dating is an absolute jungle and as some other poster has eluded to, you need the skin of a Rhinoserus to deal with the B.S. you will come up against. Examples from a mans perspective: complete and utter time wasters are the worst, but even when you get past them, be prepared be to be stood up by the faint of heart brigade who talk the talk but just can't go through with the dates (giggle, giggle) and then theres the delusional women who assume that just because they have a gash, that they automatically deserve a date with Tom Cruise and will look down their noses at anybody less.

Best thing to do is join a few clubs, especially over the winter, stuff that will have a mixed representation, I found Badminton and Drama to be best. Also just because you don't drink doesn't mean you can't go clubs or night clubs or gigs. Lots of people drive to country music gigs soo don't drink.

LegacyUser

Funny you should mention clubs, I'm actually checking out one this evening so hopefully I'll meet some people at that.

I also spoke to Matchsticks, she said I can have an informal chat with her and there would be no commitment so let's see where that goes.

zoobizoo

Clubs.... particularly those that travel at weekends - kayaking, surfing, Supping etc.

Share lifts, share houses and enjoy good times together.

Worked for me..

Emme

Dublinsingle wrote: »

Funny you should mention clubs, I'm actually checking out one this evening so hopefully I'll meet some people at that.

I also spoke to Matchsticks, she said I can have an informal chat with her and there would be no commitment so let's see where that goes.

I hope the club went well. Also follow zoobidoo's advice, it's excellent. The best way to meet people is through clubs, friends and activities. Focus on making friends first and the rest should happen naturally for someone in your demographic.

zoobizoo

Before you sign up and pay money over to Matchsticks, I'd ask a few questions.

They say thy've been doing this for 15 year - well, I've worked in that industry and I have never heard of them til now. The problem here is that they could have very limited numbers on their books. So if they're new, they won't have too many people for you to go on dates with, or suitable dates.

There is also no face to the company - other matchmaking agencies are keen to show who they are (Intro, Sharon, Twos Company) which would leave me a bit unsure about them. Maybe that's their business model.

Other agencies don't charge €50 initial chat... would you pay €50 for a chat about buyig a new laptop or a car?

LegacyUser

Thanks Emme, the club was good and they was plenty of people so hopefully I can make friends at least.

Thanks for the advice zoobizoo, I have the name of the lady who runs the company- she was on Miriam O'Callaghan's talk show during the summer I remember seeing it. Also have her LinkedIn profile. Won't be handing over any money though until I'm sure they can do something for me.

Icepick

^^^ you are not addressing the actual problem
Meeting new women is easy. Half the population
Making them interested in you is the hard part.

LegacyUser

Icepick wrote: »

Making them interested in you is the hard part.

A fair point which I accept, if I had an answer to that I could probably set up a decent business myself :-)

Feets

There is a face to the company and she was on the miriam o callaghan tv show this summer. Its not online dating and it seems to have a good success rate. They were looking for more men from what I have heard so the scales is tipped in ur favour. She owns a table for six and a farmer wants a wife nights out too.

LegacyUser

Yeah it was sounding promising but haven't heard from them in ten days - was hoping to at least have the initial chat but only message minder on their phone.

Cupcake_Crisis

Op, I’d try rejiggering your online dating profile/s and giving that another go before parting with your hard earned money.

A 33 year old, employed, seemingly sound guy looking for a relationship is a rare find when it comes to online dating so perhaps there’s something in your profile that’s a bit off putting. Do you have info about yourself? Pictures? Are you messaging people just saying “Hi”? I use online dating and would never reply to a message like that, or to a profile without info or pics.

LegacyUser

Thanks for the kind words, I'll have a look at the profiles again and see if anything can be done with them. I'm starting to think though maybe I'm meant to be single though.

LegacyUser

Apologies for bringing up an old thread but I'd just said l would post an update.

I've haven't been able to make much progress with Matchsticks as I've been waiting for her to set up a consultation since mid-November which is disappointing and I haven't chased it up since.

I have gone back on the online dating and I actually got talking to a girl and got to an hour before meeting her when she called it citing overtime at work. I wouldn't mind only she mentioned meeting first and then I ran with it as a result of her request. I tried to reschedule but couldn't get her. We still messaged though until she stopped replying. Then she deleted her profile in last few days, I'm not even sure she was real now.

Have three profiles on the go, one getting lots of views the others not so much, but no messages.

Am in a new sports club too, did try talking to a girl there but made a mess of it and she literally ran from me, now she doesn't even return a hello just walks by. Makes it hard to go over there now, but it has been good for my health I've lost a stone from it so that's a positive at least.

But still a square one in regards to actually getting to know anyone, maybe this year :-)

Funny Feeling

Sorry to here that you haven't had much luck. I feel your over thinking talking to people the girl that won't say hi who cares it's her loss. Not everyone can get on or click its not easy but you seem sound so you shouldn't have a problem. Also a lot of people are so self absorbed that they forget if you approach them. It's always nice to be nice just keep your head up and be confident, just look at what Donald Trump has achieved through confidence and little else.

I think a lot of girls won't make the first move online, i could be wrong but i wouldn't but i would in real life. Play the odds and message who ever you like. Don't know what your profile pics are like but a smile is always good.

I have always found when you don't expect it someone pop's into your life. Best of luck

zoobizoo

What kind of sports club / what approach did you take?

LegacyUser

It's one of the Martial Arts clubs, don't want to be to specific but because I have a business background I started giving advice to her that I really shouldn't have. She was starting up something and I was using that as a way to talk to her, but as I said she literally ran from me after a minute or two.