Undermined and Overlooked

PeterParker957

Hi all

Could I get your thoughts?

I've been with my job for almost ten years and in the industry for 17 (employed for near 30).

I'm not a manager or anything but was given responsibilities and was a source of information.

A year ago a new team was created and since then things have deteriorated. The boss seems to have zero confidence in me. Despite my experience when a question is asked even on the occasions it's to do with my previous role he'll ask someone else- usually someone new which is really demoralizing

He asks me to do things then changes them in front of me and if he is copied into an email even about something minor he will dictate what I should say

He is very patronising (giving me a minor task an idiot could do and making a big deal with the praise). He is really getting me down.

Am I overreacting ? Should I be glad I have a job???

callaway92

Why are you bothering to stay there? You clearly don’t enjoy working there and probably go in every day with resentment.

Fresh start warranted here somewhere else I think.

the_syco

PeterParker957 wrote: »

I've been with my job for almost ten years

PeterParker957 wrote: »

He is very patronising (giving me a minor task an idiot could do and making a big deal with the praise). He is really getting me down.

The two could be related; you're still there as you don't think you'll get a better job.

Teyla Emmagan

PeterParker957 wrote:

He asks me to do things then changes them in front of me and if he is copied into an email even about something minor he will dictate what I should say

This is some people's style. It's amazingly annoying but I would ignore it.

I would be more worried that he is going to other people with questions though.

It might be time to look around.

B.A._Baracus

PeterParker957 wrote: »

Am I overreacting ? Should I be glad I have a job???

Overall it's not an easy answer (in my opinion)
On one hand if a person is really unhappy in their job they should leave and find another. Most people don't love their job but there is a difference in finding your job alright (as in you dont mind it etc) and then being unhappy. So if you are REALLY unhappy then yeah start looking for another.

That said you state you are in the job for 17 years and in the industry for 30 years. So you are probably in your 50s right? Not to long to go for retirement so with all this giving you easy tasks does that mean your job is cushy? is the pay well? You know where I am getting here because we all have to be smart. We work to live, not live to work and many a person would gladly take condescending remarks from a boss in this world knowing the pay is great and the work is light.

So weigh up your options. Best to start sending out your CV to jobs tho as you can get a better grasp on things. You should see what other companies are willing to offer.

gozunda

PeterParker957 wrote: »

Hi all

Could I get your thoughts?

I've been with my job for almost ten years and in the industry for 17 (employed for near 30).

I'm not a manager or anything but was given responsibilities and was a source of information.

A year ago a new team was created and since then things have deteriorated. The boss seems to have zero confidence in me. Despite my experience when a question is asked even on the occasions it's to do with my previous role he'll ask someone else- usually someone new which is really demoralizing

He asks me to do things then changes them in front of me and if he is copied into an email even about something minor he will dictate what I should say

He is very patronising (giving me a minor task an idiot could do and making a big deal with the praise). He is really getting me down.

Am I overreacting ? Should I be glad I have a job???

Look up the legal definition of bullying in the workplace

Bullying is repeated inappropriate behaviour that undermines your right to dignity at work. It can be done by one or more persons and it is aimed at an individual or a group to make them feel inferior to other people. Bullying can be verbal bullying, physical bullying or cyber bullying which is carried out on the internet or mobile phones, through social networking sites, email and texts. It can take many different forms such as:

Social exclusion and isolation
Damaging someone’s reputation by gossip or rumours
Intimidation
Aggressive or obscene language
Repeated requests with impossible tasks or targets

http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/employment/equality_in_work/bullying_in_the_workplace.html

Please don't underestimate the effects of such behaviour on your health.

The question is what you should do.

Number one is to keep a log book of every incident and include a note on how it impacted you as an employee etc

Second thing is to consult your employment contract / employees handbook which employers are obliged to give you outlying their anti bullying policies

If and that's a big if you think your HR may be helpful - communicate your concerns in writing

Otherwise seek independent professional advice first

Best of luck OP - I have been through similar ...

Sam Quentin

gozunda wrote: »

Look up the legal definition of bullying in the workplace



http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/employment/equality_in_work/bullying_in_the_workplace.html

Please don't underestimate the effects of such behaviour on your health.

The question is what you should do.

Number one is to keep a log book of every incident and include a note on how it impacted you as an employee etc

Second thing is to consult your employment contract / employees handbook which employers are obliged to give you outlying their anti bullying policies

If and that's a big if you think your HR may be helpful - communicate your concerns in writing

Otherwise seek independent professiobal advice first

Best of luck OP - I have been through similar ...

Great advice there have to say

davo10

gozunda wrote: »

Look up the legal definition of bullying in the workplace



http://www.citizensinformation.ie/en/employment/equality_in_work/bullying_in_the_workplace.html

Please don't underestimate the effects of such behaviour on your health.

The question is what you should do.

Number one is to keep a log book of every incident and include a note on how it impacted you as an employee etc

Second thing is to consult your employment contract / employees handbook which employers are obliged to give you outlying their anti bullying policies

If and that's a big if you think your HR may be helpful - communicate your concerns in writing

Otherwise seek independent professional advice first

Best of luck OP - I have been through similar ...

What the op describes is not bullying.

gozunda

davo10 wrote: »

What the op describes is not bullying.

Bullying is repeated inappropriate behaviour that undermines your right to dignity at work.

I would respectfully disagree. Have you compared his description of what he has experienced with the legal definition given or is that just your opinion. ? Perhaps you should let the OP make that final call ...

I'm interested in what do you think workplace bullying is?

davo10

gozunda wrote: »

I would respectfully disagree. Have you compared his description of what he has experienced with the legal definition given or is that just your opinion. ? Perhaps you should let the OP make that final call ...

I'm interested in what do you think workplace bullying is?

It is necessary for supervisors to criticise employees in the workplace on occasion and it does not constitute Bullying.

PeterParker957

I appreciate all your comments and since posting I talk to a couple of colleagues. Turns out they feel the same and we're going to talk to him.

Appreciate the help all

jackboy

PeterParker957 wrote: »

I appreciate all your comments and since posting I talk to a couple of colleagues. Turns out they feel the same and we're going to talk to him.

Appreciate the help all

Be careful how you do it. Be respectful and don't verbally attack him.

gozunda

davo10 wrote: »

It is necessary for supervisors to criticise employees in the workplace on occasion and it does not constitute Bullying.

From what the OP wrote - constructive criticism is not evident. What the poster describes in detail goes way beyond that and Imo sounds like workplace bullying according to the definition.

gozunda

PeterParker957 wrote: »

I appreciate all your comments and since posting I talk to a couple of colleagues. Turns out they feel the same and we're going to talk to him.

Appreciate the help all

At least two people should take a record of what is said - this will ensure what is said cannot be misrepresented. Best of luck.

bobbysands81

davo10 wrote: »

It is necessary for supervisors to criticise employees in the workplace on occasion and it does not constitute Bullying.

Criticize the behaviors... not the employee.

Always tackle specific behaviors (with a view to changing them). By tackling the person you’re leaving yourself wide open to accusations as you’re ignoring the specific actions that have caused the problem in the first place.

davo10

bobbysands81 wrote: »

Criticize the behaviors... not the employee.

Always tackle specific behaviors (with a view to changing them). By tackling the person you’re leaving yourself wide open to accusations as you’re ignoring the specific actions that have caused the problem in the first place.

Critisizing the employee is not considered bullying just because the employees feelings are hurt.

Sometimes correction and instruction are necessary in the functioning of any workplace to ensure that productive work is engaged in. It may be necessary to point to faults, that can be unpleasant for the op but it's not bullying.

Lux23

davo10 wrote: »

Critisizing the employee is not considered bullying just because the employees feelings are hurt.

Sometimes correction and instruction are necessary in the functioning of any workplace to ensure that productive work is engaged in. It may be necessary to point to faults, that can be unpleasant for the op but it's not bullying.

Constant criticism shouldn't be necessary for someone who has worked in the position for ten years though. I would suspect that kind of micro-managing would be related to a lack of confidence in the manager and therefore could well be bullying.

davo10

Lux23 wrote: »

Constant criticism shouldn't be necessary for someone who has worked in the position for ten years though. I would suspect that kind of micro-managing would be related to a lack of confidence in the manager and therefore could well be bullying.

The new manager may be changing systems and work practices, the op said newer younger colleagues are being asked to do tasks. It's not bullying.

The threshold for what is considered bullying is set very high and what the op describes goes no where near meeting it.

Gorgeousgeorge

Sounds like he is afraid of your knowledge and experience