Next step

Fizzy Duck

My wife and I seem to be at an impasse in our marriage. We both love each other but we do not know what the next step for either of us should be. We are both approaching our 30s.

I am Irish and she is mexican and we met years ago online. She is a qualified Doctor (not specialised but to GP standard), whilst I am a games developer. She cannot get work here (Irish medical council are very strict) as a Doctor though we are working our way through an exam with the General Medical council of the UK, so she can work in Ireland as a locom in the future.

While we have work at the minute. I know deep down she wants to be a Doctor or to a lesser extent work in a lab. Is it unreasonable to expect her to retrain for 1-2 years in an Irish university? It's the only way we can see her getting a job that doesn't waste her talent.

It is frustrating to read of Doctor shortages and people moaning of foreign Doctors when not all the facts are known. They have preference for Irish doctors then English speaking or EU. Anyone from outside these areas are given hoops to jump through until they get tired and give up. These changes only came in recently as far back as 2013.

Obviously, an easy solution is to go to Mexico but then she says we cannot raise children there as it is very dangerous. So I feel like I am caught in this awful position and it's constantly bringing me down. I have suffered from depression before. In this situation it seems all every party can do is lose.

Sorry for ranting. I guess so even if some people could offer a different perspective maybe this would not look so gloomy.

lazybones32

Live in a border county or NI so she can practice there? Or accept the reality that she'll have to go to college for 2 years to practice in the Rep.

Citygirl1

To be honest this doesn't sound as serious as an "impasse" in your marriage, more a practical issue to be resolved. As staying in Ireland sounds like the better option long term, it seems best that she just gets down to it, and does the 1-2 years additional training required. Ye may have to look into financing this, particularly as she's an non-EU national, but surely you can assist in that regard?

Really 1-2 years is not a very long time, in the bigger picture. I'd be surprised if this has come as a complete surprise to you/your wife. Is it not fairly well known that medical qualifications are not accepted globally? eg. I understand that in the US doctors from other countries would be required to undergo significant retraining in order to practice.

To be honest, I'm very glad to hear that that Irish medical council are as strict as you say. While we need more doctors, it would seem extremely risky to simply employ medical professionals from diverse locations globally, without ensuring that everyone is working broadly to the same set of standards. After all, they are dealing with life and death situations.

QueenRizla

Has she applied for Lab work?

Fizzy Duck

QueenRizla wrote: »

Has she applied for Lab work?

We have but she seems to not get many responses.

Citygirl1 wrote: »

To be honest this doesn't sound as serious as an "impasse" in your marriage, more a practical issue to be resolved. As staying in Ireland sounds like the better option long term, it seems best that she just gets down to it, and does the 1-2 years additional training required. Ye may have to look into financing this, particularly as she's an non-EU national, but surely you can assist in that regard?

Really 1-2 years is not a very long time, in the bigger picture. I'd be surprised if this has come as a complete surprise to you/your wife. Is it not fairly well known that medical qualifications are not accepted globally? eg. I understand that in the US doctors from other countries would be required to undergo significant retraining in order to practice.

To be honest, I'm very glad to hear that that Irish medical council are as strict as you say. While we need more doctors, it would seem extremely risky to simply employ medical professionals from diverse locations globally, without ensuring that everyone is working broadly to the same set of standards. After all, they are dealing with life and death situations.

I understand completely, as we have had this conversation with the Medical Council. When we first moved here in 2013 as I had said the rules changed up until then they were quite willing to hire foreign nationals. They outlined to us to do 2 exams, she did these exams with the IELTS and received 8.5 for fluency of English and then the Medical Exam with the Medical council of UK. She then had to prove competency for Medical Council of Ireland and again she passed this. Then while waiting on the license, the rules changed and they required her to sit two more. And now within the last 12 months again this has happened, so it is frustrating to a point.

There is no problem with her doing the 1-2 years or financing it. Trying to motivate her again to do this and the same stuff could happen again. No, now please do this exam...

It's just frustrating to see her talents go to waste. Or as I say we go back over there and give up on having a family. This is where the issue is.

Citygirl1

That certainly sounds frustrating, if the requirement is a moving feast.

I can see that she would want a definite commitment from the Medical Council before undertaking significant further retraining. Have they been difficult to pin down in this regard?

If there is still some uncertainty as to their position, you might find it better to wait another year before starting the retraining, and take employment in a related field until then.

It still doesn't sound like a very good idea to relocate entirely to Mexico, if it stops you as a couple from achieving other major life objectives, such as having children. Interesting that your wife even says this. Does she like life in Ireland otherwise?