Stepsons family threatening court

Phlavin92

Well lads, I'm new to this and this is the reason I opened an account but spent time on here before.
What's on my mind is I'm with a girl from when her son was 6 months old, he's 2 and a half now and calling me daddy and I do everything a daddy does. The biological father saw him twice when he was a year old and then vanished with the wind, at first when his mam was pregnant she got in contact with him and it took the year before he replied to her. He wants nothing to do with this little boy (which is his loss) as his name is not on the birthcert. His family now, mainly his mother is threatening us with court and legal action because we can't meet them as therye in cork and we both work and have a little girl of 7 months as well as the boy. The baby boys biological grandmother is getting nasty to my girlfriend now and she worried about every little thing now, what I'm wondering is if they really have anything to go on as regards of going to court and getting guardianship or anything to do with the boy even tho her son wants nothing to do with him, he made it clear to his mother and my girlfriend. Thanks in advance for replys

Edit: I don't want people to think I'm trying stop this any way at all, I just don't want a big commotion about it. The child is in my best interests and that's all, whichever way it goes, it goes. It's in god's hands and I hope it all works out for the better.

freshpopcorn

I think this would be more suited in the Legal advice section my advice to you is to contact a solicitor to see where ye stand.

Phlavin92

freshpopcorn wrote: »

I think this would be more suited in the Legal advice section my advice to you is to contact a solicitor to see where ye stand.

Can I change section? I'm not sure how to do it

whoopsadoodles

Grandparents can get access through court, yes.

freshpopcorn

Phlavin92 wrote: »

Can I change section? I'm not sure how to do it

You can PM a mod to do it or start a new thread!

James Bond Junior

Is your username your name or part of? I advise you change it as you may be very easy to identify.

uck51js9zml2yt

No legal advice can be given in the legal forum.
You really need to contact a solicitor.

The father's family have no legal standing as far as I know but a solicitor can advise better.

the_syco

Phlavin92 wrote: »

The baby boys biological grandmother is getting nasty to my girlfriend now

The dead-beats mother has no rights, and she should stay the fcuk away.
Goto a solicitor and get a restraining order, tbh.

Have asked for the thread to be moved for ye.

boardsuser1

Yes this belongs in legal discussion.

OP, I am someone with 10 years experience in the family law court.

What I am going to say is not legal advice as that’s against the charter.

The child’s biological father can make an access application to the family law court and a judge will adjudicate according to the evidence before them plus the respective solicitors putting forward their cases for their clients.

Also grandparents can do it, I’ve been subjected to it this year myself.

I myself had virtually no relationship with my own child until she was 6 years old.

I could count on 2 hands how many times I had seen her.

Now I have unsupervised access twice a week.

Everything and the kitchen sink was fired at me to stop my applications.

In the end the child has both parents in her life.

Phlavin92

whoopsadoodles wrote: »

Grandparents can get access through court, yes.

Thanks for your reply, even if his name is not on the birthcert? They were never stopped seeing the child they just had to travel to us, once that happened her time changed.

boardsuser1

Phlavin92 wrote: »

Thanks for your reply, even if his name is not on the birthcert? They were never stopped seeing the child they just had to travel to us, once that happened her time changed.

It doesn’t matter if he is on the birth certificate or not.

A court ordered DNA test will resolve any questions on paternity.

Phlavin92

Cork Truck Driver wrote: »

Yes this belongs in legal discussion.

OP, I am someone with 10 years experience in the family law court.

What I am going to say is not legal advice as that’s against the charter.

The child’s biological father can make an access application to the family law court and a judge will adjudicate according to the evidence before them plus the respective solicitors putting forward their cases for their clients.

Also grandparents can do it, I’ve been subjected to it this year myself.

I myself had virtually no relationship with my own child until she was 6 years old.

I could count on 2 hands how many times I had seen her.

Now I have unsupervised access twice a week.

Everything and the kitchen sink was fired at me to stop my applications.

In the end the child has both parents in her life.

Thanks, I do agree that he needs his parents but when his real dad wants nothing to do with him and I done all the work for 6 months I think it's pretty clear. I appreciate your reply as I feel this is the situation we could end up in

Phlavin92

the_syco wrote: »

The dead-beats mother has no rights, and she should stay the fcuk away.
Goto a solicitor and get a restraining order, tbh.

Have asked for the thread to be moved for ye.

Everyone knows that bar her unfortunately! I didn't get it moved but I feel from the replys that I have a fair idea where we stand in regards of it. Thanks

Phlavin92

James Bond Junior wrote: »

Is your username your name or part of? I advise you change it as you may be very easy to identify.

I have nothing to hide, thanks for your concern but I'm the boys dad and I'm not ever gonna denied that. I just wanna know where we stand I just want what's best for him and save all the hassle involved

Checkmate19

One thing no name on birthcert means nothing in the courts. Nothing.

boardsuser1

Phlavin92 wrote: »

Thanks, I do agree that he needs his parents but when his real dad wants nothing to do with him and I done all the work for 6 months I think it's pretty clear. I appreciate your reply as I feel this is the situation we could end up in

You're welcome

Even if he wants nothing to do with his child that's his loss.

The child's biological grandparents are entitled to go to court and seek access.

How the court will decide no one can tell you as each case is unique in its own right.

I can only imagine the toll it must be taking on you, these events are always stressful.

Checkmate19

Also i'd say the more you fight this the worse it will get. Once you go the courts way thats when things will get messy. If you can you probably need to sort it without the courts i'd say. Because in the end the grandparents have rights and the father as well if he ever came back in the picture.

boardsuser1

Phlavin92 wrote: »

Well lads, I'm new to this and this is the reason I opened an account but spent time on here before.
What's on my mind is I'm with a girl from when her son was 6 months old, he's 2 and a half now and calling me daddy and I do everything a daddy does. The biological father saw him twice when he was a year old and then vanished with the wind, at first when his mam was pregnant she got in contact with him and it took the year before he replied to her. He wants nothing to do with this little boy (which is his loss) as his name is not on the birthcert. His family now, mainly his mother is threatening us with court and legal action because we can't meet them as therye in cork and we both work and have a little girl of 7 months as well as the boy. The baby boys biological grandmother is getting nasty to my girlfriend now and she worried about every little thing now, what I'm wondering is if they really have anything to go on as regards of going to court and getting guardianship or anything to do with the boy even tho her son wants nothing to do with him, he made it clear to his mother and my girlfriend. Thanks in advance for replys

Checkmate19 wrote: »

Also i'd say the more you fight this the worse it will get. Once you go the courts way thats when things will get messy. If you can you probably need to sort it without the courts i'd say. Because in the end the grandparents have rights and the father as well if he ever came back in the picture.

Based on how old the child is presently that is still a possibility if he so chose to do so.

Dravokivich

the_syco wrote: »

The dead-beats mother has no rights, and she should stay the fcuk away.
Goto a solicitor and get a restraining order, tbh.

Have asked for the thread to be moved for ye.

Grandparents can request access. And to be fair, even if the father doesn't want to be involved, it's not right by the child to restrict their opportunity of a relationship with their family.

Op, when it comes to it, you'll need to present that ye are unable to make the journey's.

I'm a single parent. My responsibility is to make sure the child is available for the access schedule. Not to deliver and collect.

Big Bag of Chips

Yes, as mentioned, the child's grandparents can go to court and apply for leave to apply for access to their grandchild. If that happens it is out of your gf's hands whether or not they are allowed access to him. If it is court ordered, then she has to make the child available for access. Depending on circumstances or how good a solicitor they have your gf may even be ordered to bring the child to them, or even part of the way. Once you go before a judge nothing is guaranteed. If they are granted access it is likely to be a couple of hours at first, but if it continues they may in time get overnights.

I'm not sure what these people are like but you and your gf might be better to try find a solution with them where your gf still has a bit of control over the situation, because if it goes to court she loses all control over it.

Phlavin92

Dravokivich wrote: »

Grandparents can request access. And to be fair, even if the father doesn't want to be involved, it's not right by the child to restrict their opportunity of a relationship with their family.

Op, when it comes to it, you'll need to present that ye are unable to make the journey's.

I'm a single parent. My responsibility is to make sure the child is available for the access schedule. Not to deliver and collect.

We are not restricting anything in any way, they were told numerous times they could see the child but they'd have to travel to us, that's when the fighting started (by them not us) if it goes to court we have our evidence and I'm sure they do too and a judge can decide then but for now we just want what's best for our boy.

Phlavin92

Cork Truck Driver wrote: »

You're welcome

Even if he wants nothing to do with his child that's his loss.

The child's biological grandparents are entitled to go to court and seek access.

How the court will decide no one can tell you as each case is unique in its own right.

I can only imagine the toll it must be taking on you, these events are always stressful.

I agree it is his loss, we never stopped them and even when the fighting was going on we supplied a contact for them so they could set up a time to meet to avoid conflict between us and they never done anything only harassed my gf mainly because they know she's a worrier.
It's stressful alright but I'll get through it, the kids keep me smile on and keep me strong 😊

boardsuser1

Phlavin92 wrote: »

We are not restricting anything in any way, they were told numerous times they could see the child but they'd have to travel to us, that's when the fighting started (by them not us) if it goes to court we have our evidence and I'm sure they do too and a judge can decide then but for now we just want what's best for our boy.

Without going into too much detail, how far apart of ye from the grandparents in Cork? This is something a court may take into consideration when making an order.

daheff

If you do end up going to court make sure to put in for maintenance from the father.

Snugglebunnies

Offer them access for them to travel to you in some form of writing, either a solicitors letter or registered post. If they decline, you'll have proof of offering access when you go to court and it will look bad on them for refusing. They also can't say that you have been denying access.

Also just so you know, if it goes to court only your girlfriend will be allowed into the courtroom. You'll have to wait outside as you're legally not the child's parent or guardian.

KERSPLAT!

Snugglebunnies wrote: »

Offer them access for them to travel to you in some form of writing, either a solicitors letter or registered post. If they decline, you'll have proof of offering access when you go to court and it will look bad on them for refusing. They also can't say that you have been denying access.

Also just so you know, if it goes to court only your girlfriend will be allowed into the courtroom. You'll have to wait outside as you're legally not the child's parent or guardian.

Eh that last part isn't true. It can be agreed between the applicant and respondent if someone wishes to have someone else attend a court sitting, the opposite party has the right to refuse though.

Snugglebunnies

KERSPLAT! wrote:

Eh that last part isn't true. It can be agreed between the applicant and respondent if someone wishes to have someone else attend a court sitting, the opposite party has the right to refuse though.

I've never heard of that and I've been in the family court many times, I've always had to go in alone. I must check it out!

boardsuser1

KERSPLAT! wrote: »

Eh that last part isn't true. It can be agreed between the applicant and respondent if someone wishes to have someone else attend a court sitting, the opposite party has the right to refuse though.

In my time in the family law court, the only people attending outside the parties at the centre of the case were solicitors,and those issued with a subpoena.

The ex tried to bring her friend in one day and she was stopped by the clerk.

Even those who were issued with a subpoena left after giving their own evidence.

Snugglebunnies

Cork Truck Driver wrote:

In my time in the family law court, the only people attending outside the parties at the centre of the case were solicitors,and those issued with a subpoena.

Yes, that's been my experience too...

Dravokivich

Phlavin92 wrote: »

We are not restricting anything in any way, they were told numerous times they could see the child but they'd have to travel to us, that's when the fighting started (by them not us) if it goes to court we have our evidence and I'm sure they do too and a judge can decide then but for now we just want what's best for our boy.

Nor did I suggest you were. i was responding to The_Syco there, who may have been unaware of that.