Unemployment and Mental Illness

Stonedpilot

Recent housemate and good mate always had my back, of mine was made unemployed from hospital job and I've noticed he has become quite depressed and cynical. Hard working guy but sleeps til 1pm, sometimes cries, isolates himself alot etc. I had a terrible nightmare lastnight he commit suicide and I was the one who found him covered in blood, it scared the bejeesus out of me as it was so vivid. Seen him later and it was eerie. I involve him in things and spins off in the car to beach, woods, soccer matches etc and such as I have been unemployed several times and it can get depressing and tiring. Sending numerous CV's out , telephone calls and not a peep back. He's educated guy too and always worked on courses like myself when not working.

I think the way some people go on is disgusting regarding unemployment frankly. Dole scrounger this and dole scounger that, get everything for free, 10 holdays a year too lazy to do this and that etc etc.

I have met many unemployed people in my time and never ever once met one who wanted to be!. Everyone wanted to contribute and work and have purpose to their day (you can unemployed just it's hard to afford your hobbies and passions).
Of course you have the lunatics on this who think you can afford Merc's and holidays to the Bahama's on €193 a week, (love to know what planet they are living on!) but people need to be realistic. No people don't need kid gloves but compassion and a bit of support.

Anyway I think their really should be a push to encourage those who aren't working to open up and seek help. I did when I wasn't working as I thought and drank myself into a very dark place of which I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy (not that I have any, lifes too bloody short!).
Depression can creep up and kill easily if people aren't aware of it and I know my mate is very sensitive about not working, I know I was too back in the day.
I try help him as best I can. I remember someone helped me before when my head was wrecked and spent time with me when I got very depressed in the past and was drinking like a fish, I asked him why you helping me?.

Because someone helped me was his response. I always remember that. Gotta give it back, the time, the compassion, the whatever.

I just think attitudes especially on this forums toward unemployment stink, and it certainly doesn't help those not in employment. I don't say working as everyone works to some degree regardless of job or not. Works on themselves, with their kids, in the community, on their education etc etc.

Seeing my mate like that really makes me realize We're all on this pale blue dot for a short while, might as well be nice to each other.

Peace

Tenigate

There is a lot of truth in what you are saying.
The stigma comes from government programmes that trap people in unemployment while giving them a virtuous victim mentality and a huge sense of entitlement. There are many happy, unemployed people who plod along and are happy to scrounge. It's shameful.
On the other hand, you have a friend who doesn't want to be unemployed and is feeling the stigma.
I've been depressed at times (both while working, and while unemployed) and know that both having a job and being unemployed can be stressful and depressing for different reasons.
Many times it's a sense of not meeting expectations that causes depression. I'd advise your friend to join up to one of those courses that keeps him busy and gives him a sense of community or achievement. In addition, he needs to seek professional help. His GP is a good first contact as his state of mind is affecting his day-to-day life (he may need medication). He should also take counselling to address the mindset that is making him unhappy.

Stonedpilot

Tenigate wrote: »

There is a lot of truth in what you are saying.
The stigma comes from government programmes that trap people in unemployment while giving them a virtuous victim mentality and a huge sense of entitlement. There are many happy, unemployed people who plod along and are happy to scrounge. It's shameful.
On the other hand, you have a friend who doesn't want to be unemployed and is feeling the stigma.
I've been depressed at times (both while working, and while unemployed) and know that both having a job and being unemployed can be stressful and depressing for different reasons.
Many times it's a sense of not meeting expectations that causes depression. I'd advise your friend to join up to one of those courses that keeps him busy and gives him a sense of community or achievement. In addition, he needs to seek professional help. His GP is a good first contact as his state of mind is affecting his day-to-day life (he may need medication). He should also take counselling to address the mindset that is making him unhappy.

All in time. Hes a proud lad so maybe wouldnt admit how bad his mind is or go to Dr but me and the housemates are being kind and patient too him. Yes stigma can be horrible. He doesnt really have a family as such for complicated reasons so relies on us and friends. All can do is offer to give him lifts, give him time and a dig out when he needs it.