Have you ever been a witness in court?

private89

J got a witness summons to be a witness in a Circuit Court case next month over something that happened last year. Hoped it wouldn't go to trial but it is.

What was it like being a witness? Were you nervous?

Have you ever been a witness in court? Do the Gardai/solicitors go through things with you before the case?

I've been up in court before but only in the District Court and pleaded guilty so not seen a trial before

Donald Trump

Bring lube.

Generally, you will first be taken to a back room and anally probed by the judge, prosecution barristers and then defence barristers. They do it in order to check whether or not you the witness are full of ****

mikeybrennan

Smoke a bit of weed if you're nervous

wotzgoingon

Donald Trump wrote: »

Bring lube.

Generally, you will first be taken to a back room and anally probed by the judge, prosecution barristers and then defence barristers. They do it in order to check whether or not you the witness are full of ****

And this is coming from Donald Trump, I'd say you were anal probed on more than one occasion.

Donald Trump

mikeybrennan wrote: »

Smoke a bit of weed if you're nervous

Amateur. Speed is your only man for such a situation where you are going to be asked questions.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsxYfYCbVC0

Donald Trump

wotzgoingon wrote: »

Donald Trump wrote: »

Bring lube.

Generally, you will first be taken to a back room and anally probed by the judge, prosecution barristers and then defence barristers. They do it in order to check whether or not you the witness are full of ****

And this is coming from Donald Trump, I'd say you were anal probed on more than one occasion.

Melania does it to me every night. So that I can be well prepared.

DontThankMe

I haven't been a witness in court but, I have witnessed a court in session.

Your Face

Donald Trump wrote: »

Bring lube.

Generally, you will first be taken to a back room and anally probed by the judge, prosecution barristers and then defence barristers. They do it in order to check whether or not you the witness are full of ****

Are you sure you were in court?

leggo

It's boring. You have to sit through a bunch of cases before yours gets called where you'll see junkies make excuses for doing terrible things and play the legal system like a fiddle. When you get up, just tell the truth, don't let yourself get coached by any of the involved parties else you end up looking like a fool. It's not like the movies with ingenious cross-examinations and legal eagles shouting the words "and furthermore..." at people, it's just lads doing their jobs who'd rather be out having pints, so don't make it complicated for yourself and best case scenario you'll just have a really boring day.

uck51js9zml2yt

Also, it's "judge" not " your honour" or "mi lord".

Borderfox

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YseUY5r0eEA

BrokenArrows

Its mandatory at some point while being questioned to tell the solicitor that they can't handle the truth.

Greybottle

You just go in and say in your best upper class Old Etonian accent. "He's guilty m'Lud, the boy must hang..... THE BOY WILL HANG!!!!"

Prepare for much screaming and fainting of ladies in the public gallery.

ectoraige

Nina Moldy Rock wrote: »

Also, it's "judge" not " your honour" or "mi lord".

That's only for District Courts. In Circuit Courts it's "Toss" or "Your Tosser".

Also, it's a little known fact but if you don't want to swear on the bible, you will be given a copy of Peig to swear on instead.

razorblunt

Wear a red stripey tie, when under cross examination, whilst the prosecutor's back is turned take it off.
This will make him question the whole thing.



Oh wait , that happens to you as a witness.