New job anxiety

LegacyUser

I started a new job this week. I left the one I had before it after four months. It was a programming/software dev job and even though I enjoyed it most of the time, this job was based nearer home and I decided to apply for it. There were a number of reasons for leaving the other one for this one. First I was paying rent and with the new one I could move home to live with my parents and be there for them as well as saving a bit of money.
Even though I am 42 I didn't mind moving home because my parents are both in their 80's and there is just my sister and me and she is married and moved out long ago. She has a fairly distant relationship with my parents anyway. Two of my mother's brothers died in the last couple of years and she gets a bit depressed. My father is retired and suffers from depression a fair bit. Anyway the upshot of it all is I hate my new job already. I am at home and that is a comfort to me because I hated living in the city in the last one (I won't say which city but it's not Dublin). We live on a farm at home, it is a two storey house and there is lots of room outside with a garden etc.
The main cause of my anxiety in the new job is that my boss has announced he is leaving in three weeks and I will have to do his job when he leaves. The IT manager said he didn't know that when I did my interview. My job was supposed to be supporting him but now I am really stressed about having that responsibility. I don't like having a lot of responsibility and that was part of the reason for me leaving the last job too. I am kind of in shock to tell the truth and I haven't slept too well since I was told.
The day I left the last job my manager gave me the option of working from home but I had already verbally accepted the new job so I turned them down. I thought this was going to be a support role anyway and it would be easier. I wasn't very good at the job anyway, it took me ages to get some things working, I had to work on stuff in the evenings and weekends, I was always getting stuck on coding issues. I worked on my own which meant there was no help when I had a problem. A few times I had to pay someone on freelancer.com to do my work for me. I got depressed living in the city too. I kind of regret not taking the work from home option now but I didn't want to break my word.
I get very stressed and anxious when I am under pressure or if I am in a situation not familiar to me. I can't take a lot of pressure or stress and I get all flustered and worked up.
I kind of left the last job to get away from stress and now here I am in a new job being told I have to take over from my boss in three weeks. I feel like quitting because the terms of my contract have changed (or will change in three weeks).However I don't want to be a wimp either. I don't have another job to go to.
Maybe I will be re-interviewed for my managers's job but I doubt it. In typical Irish style I will be thrown in, "yerra he'll be grand".
But I won't be grand because I don't think I will be able to learn everything in three weeks and I will be under unreal pressure when he goes. My salary might be raised but I don't care about that, I just don't want to do the job.I am not lazy, far from it, I just don't have the mentality or personality to do a job like that.
I had a job teaching IT for a year and I loved it but it was only a contract position and I couldn't get another one like it near home. If I had my choice that would be what I would do for a living because the stress levels are low and I was good at it.
I just know I will get rattled when I have to take over from my manager. There is a mountain of stuff to do and I know I won't be able to handle it. Even my manager has admitted to me that he won't be able to cover everything in three weeks. What should I do? I don't want to go back to being unemployed again.

shesty

Stick where you are and keep shouting that you are new and you don't know how to do xyz.
I have a similar situation in that a week before I took up a new role, the existing manager announced his imminent departure.It's been tough but I've stuck it out.
I've been asking questions all around me.I keep reminding people I don't know the role yet.I have pestered the guy above the manager who has left (so two levels above me) if I have any problems or issues that need dealing with.It's all I can do.In a way it's good that you're new, because you can really plead total ignorance (and people will help!) Moreso than if you knew the role well, you'd be expected to pick up the reins quickly!!

If you really don't want that role, I would keep asking when they will be doing interviews or replacing the guy.And then....if it hasn't sorted itself out after a while, think of leaving.Bit give it a chance first.

kylith

Of course you'll be able to handle it! Don't mentally set yourself up to fail. When your manager is explaining things write down every srep so you can refer back when you need to. Dont' be afraid to tell people that you're new at the job and ask them to be patient with you.

LegacyUser

I haven't slept too well since I was told. I just hope that it doesn't get on top of me me and I have a meltdown and walk out or something. I haven't been sleeping too well and I keep thinking about it. The guy I am replacing is supposed to be showing me the ropes but he has done very little of that because now that people have got wind he is going they have been throwing work at him to do before he goes. He is too busy to train me.