How do I actually go about getting married?

hazelZzz

My OH and I want to get married, we just want a non-religious civil ceremony type thing, I find the information online incredibly confusing.

So from what I can gather, it says I need to apply for a meeting to get approval to marry and that I have to wait three months from that point to actually get married, is this correct?

The other thing that is confusing me is when I try and book that meeting online it is telling me that there are no dates available? Like anywhere it seems?

Can anyone enlighten me on the process?Is there another way to do it? Like can I contact somebody myself or does it have to be booked online?

Thanks!

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hazelZzz

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Thanks for the reply! Do you know is it Births, deaths and marriages that I must ring? Thanks!

baby and crumble

Yes, you have to leave at least 3 months from the date you register your intention to marry and your ceremony.

If the booking system in your area isn't working (sometimes it goes wonky I believe) then just ring them up (find your local area on this page) and get an appointment. Make sure and bring all your documentation with you on the day. It doesn't take long at all.

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Wheety

Where are you based?

hazelZzz

Wheety wrote: »

Where are you based?

Clonmel!

Wheety

Sorry, i got married recently in Dublin. Thought I may be able to give you exact details.

Have you had a read of this?

http://www.hse.ie/eng/services/list/1/bdm/crsappointment/

There's a link on the left for booking an appointment.

scarepanda

I rang the office and got an appointment the following week. So figure out what births deaths and marriages office suits you the best and ring them. You don't have to go to your local one or the one in the region you want to get married in btw.

You will need to have figured out who will marry you and where you are getting married because you need their details for the form that you need to fill up. Your options for a non religious wedding is HSE solmeniser or humanist. The spiritualist union of Ireland are technically a religion, but will do non religious ceremonies.

GingerLily

This topic, no frills/just legal wedding should probably be a sticky at this stage, so many people asking lately!

Probably best to stick to a registry office OP if you just want to do the legal thing and not the ceremony

StarBright01

Humanist ceremony could be an option too. Ceremony pretty much the same as civil but a lot less restrictions You can get married any day you wish and less "red tape" about giving notice etc.

baby and crumble

StarBright01 wrote: »

Humanist ceremony could be an option too. Ceremony pretty much the same as civil but a lot less restrictions You can get married any day you wish and less "red tape" about giving notice etc.

The legal aspect (3 months notice) is standard and part of legislation. There's no way around it (unless you make a special petition as to why you can't wait 3 months- usually means one of the couple is dying tbh).

If you want to get married asap then humanist will be tricky, they book up REALLY fast, although if you're happy to go midweek then mightn't be a problem.

ILikeBoats

You still have to give 3 months notice for a humanist ceremony

hazelZzz

scarepanda wrote: »

I rang the office and got an appointment the following week. So figure out what births deaths and marriages office suits you the best and ring them. You don't have to go to your local one or the one in the region you want to get married in btw.

You will need to have figured out who will marry you and where you are getting married because you need their details for the form that you need to fill up. Your options for a non religious wedding is HSE solmeniser or humanist. The spiritualist union of Ireland are technically a religion, but will do non religious ceremonies.

Ok cool! That puts things into better perspective! So I am looking at the register of solemnisers here and I see a couple in my area, do I contact one of them first before I make the appointment and then add them onto the form?

Thanks

hazelZzz

baby and crumble wrote: »

The legal aspect (3 months notice) is standard and part of legislation. There's no way around it (unless you make a special petition as to why you can't wait 3 months- usually means one of the couple is dying tbh).

If you want to get married asap then humanist will be tricky, they book up REALLY fast, although if you're happy to go midweek then mightn't be a problem.

We don't mind waiting 3 months anyway, we just want to get the ball rolling and set a date more than anything

cml387

hazelZzz wrote: »

We don't mind waiting 3 months anyway, we just want to get the ball rolling and set a date more than anything

If you haven't already found out, the office in Clonmel is in the HSE clinic at the entrance to St. Joseph's hospital.

SarahS2013

You should probably decide where and when and how you're going to actually get married first.
We have our wedding booked for next August in City Hall and we're going in to give our "intention to marry" this August. We made the appt online with no issues.
You have to give the names of your witnesses etc at the "intention" appointment. Not sure if they also ask you to state where you're getting married.
Regarding getting a humanist celebrant, you'll do well to find one to marry you in 3 months. We struggled to get one in Dublin for our wedding which is 13 months out.

Psychologeeee

I've been told it works differently in some places i.e. you set a date and then they give you the date of the notification appointment 3 months before OR you get a notification appointment and set a date at this!

Not sure if that's correct though!

ILikeBoats

When you have your intention-to-get-married meeting with the HSE, you need to provide your wedding ceremony type, your solemniser's name, your venue and your witnesses. These are all printed on the licence you receive back.
There is sections on the licence to change all of the above. Say if you had to change solemniser, venue etc in the 3 months. So if you can get something tentatively, there's no issues in changing it.

scarepanda

hazelZzz wrote:

Ok cool! That puts things into better perspective! So I am looking at the register of solemnisers here and I see a couple in my area, do I contact one of them first before I make the appointment and then add them onto the form?

The only caveat to my last post is that I'm not sure if you need to give your notice in the same office if you plan on a HSE solmeniser to marry you. Either way you need to have at least provisionally booked who will marry you and also know the venue.

In my experience you need to contact humanists directly, although if you want to get married sooner rather than later the only ones you will get are the newly qualified celebrants. The spiritualist union of Ireland work from a central base. So you can ring them up and enquire if someone in your area is free and if so they will send you on the relevant contact info. If you don't have anyone in particular in mind they will see if there is someone in the locality that's available on your date. The only thing I will say about this is that I would advise getting recommendations from people about certain celebrants. While spiritualists will do a non religious ceremony some are more religious and more 'strict' about what they will do. I ended up ringing our venue for a recommendation and they recommended one of two Spiritualists as they knew we wanted a non religious ceremony. The other spiritualist that covers the venue would be a bit more out there.

And finally, is your venue approved for marriage ceremonies? This is something you need to find out when booking. If it's not you can get it certified, but I don't know what process is involved.

StarBright01

ILikeBoats wrote: »

You still have to give 3 months notice for a humanist ceremony

Never realised that sorry!