Not enjoying college

LegacyUser

I'm a soon to be second year college student and I'm dreading the return to college in September. I pushed myself to get the CAO points required (500 +) but my first year in college was just meh. I expected things to change in life but they didn't. I failed an exam and have a repeat soon. This was mainly due to working in a local shop when I should have been in lectures. I'm not really in a position where my parents can fund college they've enough on their plate and I'm not eligible for grants. I've seen all these people who've came to study here and are living in student apartments and are really enjoying the social aspect of college. They aren't working and can attend lectures and social events (mostly on grants or funded by parents, unfair life sure...)
I'm not enjoying college or the social life. I'm either working nights or at home with my parents cause I wouldn't have transport home after nights out . I feel like I've missed an opportunity of not going to college in Dublin. To get away from the country, I live too near my current college to get a grant. Do I go into second year or do I drop put? I think I'm too late to reapply for this year. I don't want to cause more stress for my parents. They think I'm really enjoying my course.

Pelvis

What would you do if you dropped out? Doesn't sound like you could afford to go to college in Dublin, I assume any grant would only cover a portion of expenses, and you'd still need to work to support yourself.

Sometimes we do things, not because we enjoy them, but because they need to be done. By all means, if you have a realistic plan b, then go ahead and drop out. But if you don't then dropping out achieves nothing.

miss nesbit

It doesnt seem to me that you want to drop out becuase you dislike the course itself.
It seems you have a lot of balls in the air and are stuggling to manage it all.
This may be why you have a repeat. You will pass it and move into 2nd year with a clean slate.

You need to look at the other factors and how you can manage them better. Can you get a better paid job?
Are you working full-time during the summer to take the pressure off during the semester?
You can manage it all you just need to figure out how.

Dont be disheartened it sounds like you are doing a good job and it wont always be like this.

Koptain Liverpool

Do you have a plan B if you do decide to drop out?

If not then it might be a good idea to decide to finish the course anyway.

Unless you really hate it that is.

What are you studying and how many years is it?

A lot of people I knew who struggled through college like you ended up studying harder than others who just partied for 3-4 years and ended up getting much better degrees and actually learning a lot more.

They then went on to get great jobs straight out of college and really started to enjoy life.

While many of those who partied through college got crap degrees, didn't really learn much at all, and ended up stuck in crappy jobs for years or even unemployed.

My point is that even if it seems tough now, as long as you have some sort of interest in your topic of study, if you work hard for a couple of years (which will pass quickly!!), then you will be in a great position to start earning well and enjoying life a lot more in no time at all.

LegacyUser

If you drop out now you're going to have to pay back full fees for the first year off your next degree (7,000+ course dependent). Have you seen the price of rent in Dublin also before you look through rose tinted glasses?

Airyfairy12

I think most students if given the choice would prefer to study in Dublin, Galway or Cork but unfortunately for some of us its not financially possible, there are people working full time well paid jobs that cant afford to live in a city so commute 3+ hours every single day. I specifically chose a college in the cheapest place I could find because my only income was my grant which worked out at 320 a month, at the height of the recession there were no jobs, it meant not eating from one day to the next but I stuck it out because I had no other choice. I take it you're about 18/19 you'll be finished your course by age 21, thats so young, youve only got 2 years left, stick it out. You'll be delighted when you get that degree and as someone else said, save up over the summer to ease some financial pressure throughout the year. Can you find weekend work waitressing or something so youre not missing lectures?

Permabear

This post has been deleted.

freshpopcorn

If you like your course I'd recommend you stay! I think you do but you feel like your social life and college life is in trouble because of your financial situation.
I know when I was at college their was a place you could get some finical aid. It was organised either by the college or the student union. I know a few people who got it. Is their anything like this at your college?
Have you talked to employer about your college hours and would they be willing to help you with this?
Would you look at another job which would involve more evening work?
Have you talked to parents about how you are feeling? If your parents/family don't know your struggling they can't help you

dev100

Life is extremely unfair : " the Haves and the have Not s " phrase comes to mind believe me you will experience this thru out life . I was similar I was told at 16 " you get good grades to commute to Dublin and the train/bus fair would always be paid " but college and social aspects would have to be funded by myself and the option of grant wasn't a possibility either . It shatters any illusions a 16yr would have thinking money grows on trees I ended doing an apprenticeship and haven't looked back. I was lucky somewhat.

Basically your parents can't fund you the carefree lifestyle that every young student wants when heading to college and the state won't support you either . There's nowt you can do about it it's just a fact of life.

Stay in college and achieve your best . Cut your working hours down to a manageable amount or find a better paid job and less hours and put as much effort as you can into college / don't worry about failing , life isn't simple just get back up and go again and get it done . You'll find yourself realising those 4 years went quick and it's only with hard work and effort on your part that you can achieve good things in life.

seanrambo87

Hi Qwerty, I'd urge you to stay in college, it looks to me like it's the social aspect your missing, I wouldn't quit over that.

I wouldn't quit to take up the same course further away from your support network just so you can get a grant. I can guarantee you if you think life is hard now multiply it by ten trying to feed, clothe and shelter yourself in Dublin. If as you say your parents are already spread thin you will potentially create a further hardship for them. I can't emphasise how important a local support network is when your finding your feet.

I would only quit the course if I Hated it.

That's my 2c on it as someone who never availed of college when it was substantially cheaper and I had the points, not as many as you though.

I went the construction route 4 years before the arse fell out of it and here I am 30 years of age, with no major qualifications and some major decisions to make in the coming months about what I need to do to secure my families future.

LegacyUser

Hi qwerty96,

I can understand how you feel somewhat. You can't get the grant and your in a local college and still living at home.

You need to do the following
Stick with the course you are in and don't think of moving to Dublin as it very hard to get place to live in and it is very expensive for everything.
If your working you need to chat to your employer about your hours. Missing college lectures for a min wage job is not a good idea. See if you can get more hours in the summer and at weekends rather than doing this.
Could you aim to get out one night a month with your college friends - could you share a taxi with a few friends or get your parent to collect you at x time. This will give your some thing to look forward to and I think having some bit of a social life will help you feel better.
I would not consider dropping out of college - what do you do then? - A college degree gives you more options work wise and you can also avail of post grad courses.

I know a guy who repeated his leaving to get into college. A few months later he failed his exams due to a non stop social life. He then got a job in a shop. At the moment he could work 8 to 24 hours a week. He could have 3 hours work today and 4 hours tomorrow. Some weeks he can get a 2 or 3 days dole on top of this. If he works one hour a day he cant get the dole.
Meanwhile most of his friends are in college and long term they will have a higher chance of getting better jobs with proper hours.

Another lad I know got to diploma level in college during the boom. He worked for a year and his mother told him your going back to college to get your degree. He was not to keen on this as it was during the boom.
He went back to college. Meanwhile his friends were doing building work, earning good money, having holidays and driving nice cars when he was on a limited budget and driving an old banger of a car.
After college he got a good job and within a few years his friends were unemployed and or living abroad.

Some times you have to look at things as short term pain for long term gain.

Ursus Horribilis

Do you not have any college friends whose sofas you could sleep on occasionally? Are there any later buses you could catch so you could spend more time around the college/pub in the evenings?

I work with people who've got kids at college in Dublin and the costs would stand your hair on end. Have you costed this plan and worked out how you'd finance it. What good will being in a larger city be to you if you can't afford to go out and socialise anyway? Or if you end up working so many hours you aren't free to go to anyone's party.

In the grand scale of things, your few short years at college are a tiny blip. I can't remember my college years in any great detail now and it's not because I dissolved my brain cells with alcohol. It's just one stage of your life and there will be others.

evolving_doors

Any chance you could start saving a very small amount towards the J1 to the states. I think that was my favourite part of college!!
The job you have you probably want to keep but maybe there might be other types of work you could consider that pays more.

Well done on the 500 points btw. You have the brains to do well. I think you're learning early about how life is unfair whilst looking at your college peers. Keep your eye on your own prize.

Any chance of scholarships / erasmus abroad for a year. I know a few who went to Asia on different scholarships, they got great international experience which has opened their eyes to opportunities and friendships outside Ireland. Sometimes colleges are very bad at advertising what's available in that regard.

The Red m

Nothere2017 wrote: »

If you drop out now you're going to have to pay back full fees for the first year off your next degree (7,000+ course dependent). Have you seen the price of rent in Dublin also before you look through rose tinted glasses?

If you finish the whole 4 years of your course, you will also have to pay full fees on your next course, so that's 7000+ per year. If you drop out now, you will only have to pay the full fees for first year.

I regret finishing the course I did because of this. But that's it in this country, you're meant to know what you want at 17 and you're screwed if you want a second chance.

Ursus Horribilis

The OP doesn't appear to have an issue with the course. Just their lack of a social life.

homerjay2005

OP, if you like the course, then keep at it and forget everything else, for now. try balance your time better and get a job that is nights/weekends based as opposed to clashing with lectures.

your social life will follow once you graduate and have money.