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Problem with counsellor

  • 17-07-2017 11:21am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi not sure if anyone can help but hoping someone can.

    I started seeing a counsellor but havnt worked through anything, I get on with her great I knew from day one she was very understanding and that id clicked with her but the problem is she talks 85% percent of the session and I hardly get a word in.
    She'll ask me a question, ill answer then she'll start talking about similar experiences she's had with her family or she'll start telling me about her children and how they live abroad or she'll go off on a tangent about something or ill say something and she'll assume what I mean, be totally wrong, go off on a tangent about what she thinks I mean and I cant get a word in.
    I like that she talks to me about herself, the last counsellor I went to didnt even provide her real first name and wasnt listening to anything I said so would repeat and ask generic questions, so I was delighted to find a counsellor where sessions felt like a friendly chat but I can honestly say I know more about the counsellors life than she knows about mine.
    What do I do? I really like her but its costing me money every week and im not working through anything.


Comments

  • #2
    Another day
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 146 ✭✭Another day


    Find a new one. That is not the way a professional works.


  • #3
    zoobizoo
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,746 ✭✭✭zoobizoo


    Yep, find a new one.

    You're not there for a chat.

    Did you check qualifications?


  • #4
    SATSUMA
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 706 ✭✭✭SATSUMA


    Is she in training? Time to find someone new. But first, tell her how you feel.


  • #5
    nkav86
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 714 ✭✭✭nkav86


    Went to a guy that liked the silent or 'how does that make you feel approach'. It was awful for me, as it wasn't what I needed. I left, found another that was engaged and talkative, made it more of a conversation than a question and answer session.

    Best thing I've ever done, it's not easy to switch, at least it wasn't for me but I had to. But don't do what I did and just never go back, tell her why you feel it's not working they'd rather get feedback (at least the good ones do). I say don't, I had awful guilt because of it, that didn't help either.


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