POV @ 8 months pregnant

laraido

My wife has been obviously pregnant for 4 months now and uses the train every day. No one offers up seats. Passengers either shut their eyes mid Netflix episode OR just ignore the 'pregnant lady'.

Does anyone else think this is :eek:?

Hilly Bill

The image showed the priority seats occupied, they should be given up if needed by those that need them most or asks. Unless you ask then some will just blank you thinking you don't want to sit and some are just selfish anyway. They may have been standing all the other time and on the one commute they finally get a seat, there is no way they will give it up.
If someone is 8 months pregnant or 4 months and decides to commute at peak times then just bear in mind that the train may be busy and you may be standing the whole way.

mojesius

I agree with you OP, it's horrible and ignorant. I often see old people having to stand while seated passengers are either glued to their devices or see them but ignore them. Me feiner society and it seems to be getting worse than 10+ years ago. I'm in early pregnancy myself and not looking forward to packed train fun towards the end of the year but will probably try to leave either 630am or after 9 at that stage to avoid the worst of it.

tracey turnblad

I stood and held a child on the bus while very obviously pregnant and no one has given up there seats. On the flip side when I was pregnant on each of mine I had very bad morning sickness and although I didn't look pregnant I couldn't have given up my seat for anyone so could have come across as a wagon

Red Alert

I would always give up a seat to someone obviously elderly or pregnant. Just one thing to think about though - for about six months I suffered from extreme exhausting fatigue because of a medical condition. I didn't look any different, but just remember before giving out to or about anyone that they mightn't be in their whole health.

beans

A kindly request for the seat will always get you a seat, if that person isn't incapacitated themselves. It's a shame that some people don't tend to be proactive in offering, but mostly these things can be worked out with some polite dialogue.

To the OP's point, yeah it's :eek: but all we can do is lead by example, offer our own seats up to people who need them, and not get so hung-up on the cnuts, because I believe there are more decent folks than cnuts out there.

Does Ireland have anything like the London underground pregnant lady badges that passengers can wear to make their needs explicit?

Xterminator

Hi OP

Does you wife ask people? I would personally like to think people would not have to be asked but in the real world if she wants to sit it would work better than standing there eyeballing people hoping someone will be shamed into moving.

I was on the luas the other day (red line) and a really old frail lady with a walking stick got on, and the only (or first) person to offer her a seat was a hijab wearing teenager. Lots of people not making eye contact.

magicbastarder

my sister in law, when (visibly) pregnant for the first time, worked in the city centre and got the train home to coolmine. she used to have to get a *southbound* train out to landsdowne road, and swap for a northbound train, as a way of getting a seat, as they hadn't filled at that point. she was (IIRC) offered a seat on 5 occasions.

irelandrover

I give up my seat when i notice someone pregnant. Howver, on 90% of journies I really just space out watching reading or watching something and really dont notice whats going on around me.

I do have another point of view. Did you give up your seat before your wife was pregnant? Its only when you've known someone who was pregnant how much they actually require the seat.

ED E

Sometimes the fat vs pregnant line can be a very fuzzy one (though it probably isnt at 8mo).

Diemos

I'm usually one of the people tuned out, watching something on my phone. It's my daily commute and I use it to switch off and tune out.
But personally, I have been chewed out too many times by people after I have offered them my seat.
So now I will stand for anyone who asks. But I'm done offering, 1 public bollocking too many.

Did your wife ask anyone for a seat?
Why should the onus be on the person seated to observe if a person is in need?
As stated above, many people in need may look fine, whether through a medical condition or a pregnancy that is not immediately obvious.

wordofwarning

OP I can see where you are coming from. But there is nothing worse than sitting on the downstairs of the bus and seeing someone offer a 'pregnant lady' a sit to torn into shreds by someone who 'just called her fat'. I have seen it several times. Instead of politely declining, some fat person with a bone to grind will just lose it with someone. At times it is hard to tell if someone is fat or pregnant

I seen have seen people getting it lifted out of it from old people for wrongly guessing their age.

The worst I seen last week was an OAP who was not in the slightest bit bother giving up the wheelchair seat for someone with a pram to sit down despite their being an empty seat.

IMO I think most people would totally fine with your wife asking for a seat. I know it is not ideal, but I don't see most people taking an issue with 'hi, I am 8 months pregnant. Im sorry would you mind me having your seat'. Sometimes on a full bus you have to ask for people to move their bags or move over a seat