How predictable are your bowel movements ?

Jobs OXO

Not sure how to add a poll but I can set my watch to my daily plonking session. Always 15 minutes after I wake up. It's like clockwork. Once a day 15 mins after I wake for as long as I remember. Doesn't matter what I've eaten or drank. Always the same. Anyone have similar clockwork like bowels?

me_irl

Literal sh*t thread.

Cee-Jay-Cee

within 15 minutes of eating in the morning the ol' urge comes on me and I grab a magazine or book or my phone and head for some quality quiet time on the crapper.

degsie

A 'ghostie' pretty much every morning half an hour after I get up, saves on toilet paper

Kimbot

This thread just made me wanna cr*p, thats about an hour and a half early....... not good OP, not good

hondaguy01

I get a chance to play solitaire during my morning visit to the crapper............2 games and wham am finished for the day

Hande hoche!

Coffee helps.

RocketRaccoon

First thing in the morning (4am) and mid afternoon. Every day for the last 20 years.

Sam Kade

Why do people prolong their dump by reading and all that nonsense, just let it rip and be done.

Cina

Very unpredictable. I have IBS.

Anyone who has predictable bowel movements is a lucky bastard.

I wouldn't wish constipation upon even my worst enemy.

Sam Kade

Cina wrote: »

Very unpredictable. I have IBS.

Anyone who has predictable bowel movements is a lucky bastard.

I wouldn't wish constipation upon even my worst enemy.

Plenty natural supplements to rectify that.

Boom_Bap

I'm nearly 100% certain that in Germany there is laxative in coffee or the water in taps in the morning.
Every time I visit which is a few times a year, I notice that after the morning coffee, there is a scramble for the jacks. I've spoken to all my German friends and family about this and they all crap in the morning after coffee.
Those that don't drink coffee have a sympathetic crap as well.

As for mine, you can nearly time when it happens daily.

Kimbot

Boom_Bap wrote: »

I'm nearly 100% certain that in Germany there is laxative in coffee or the water in taps in the morning.
Every time I visit which is a few times a year, I notice that after the morning coffee, there is a scramble for the jacks. I've spoken to all my German friends and family about this and they all crap in the morning after coffee.
Those that don't drink coffee have a sympathetic crap as well.

As for mine, you can nearly time when it happens daily.

Well actually, its probably the water and the way they treat it. When I'm in work (Half way across the country from where I live) I notice as soon as I sip my first cup of tea I need to cr*p but its not like that at home at all.

Neon_Lights

I have a **** at six of clock everyday when I come in from work, it's so predictable the gf and I have dubbed it the angelus

Boom_Bap

jonnycivic wrote: »

Well actually, its probably the water and the way they treat it. When I'm in work (Half way across the country from where I live) I notice as soon as I sip my first cup of tea I need to cr*p but its not like that at home at all.

Your bowels are just homesick. :pac:

A bigger question is, are people home poopers or will they squat anywhere?

Kimbot

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Your bowels are just homesick. :pac:

A bigger question is, are people home poopers or will they squat anywhere?

My bowels are just sick..... like me :P

Oh I'm a home pooper or a work pooper so I can get paid for having a cr*p

Boom_Bap

jonnycivic wrote: »

My bowels are just sick..... like me :P

Oh I'm a home pooper or a work pooper so I can get paid for having a cr*p

That's some fine multitasking :pac:

Kimbot

Boom_Bap wrote: »

That's some fine multitasking :pac:

Sure I do be on here too so thats some uber multi-tasking

Boom_Bap

You're just showing off now.

Kimbot

Boom_Bap wrote: »

You're just showing off now.

Showing off would be me doing all the above, taking a selfie and posting it in this thread......... I'll be right back :pac:

Boom_Bap

jonnycivic wrote: »

Showing off would be me doing all the above, taking a selfie and posting it in this thread......... I'll be right back :pac:

Sounds like someone just had their first sip of tea in work!

Kimbot

Boom_Bap wrote: »

Sounds like someone just had their first sip of tea in work!

I actually did