Ex won't stop calling

LegacyUser

My ex won't stop calling me on a private number. We ended it a month ago, and they call daily. Sometimes they call 8 times , and I've to turn my phone off, which is harmful to my business.

I don't want to get the guards involved, or lead them on by answering but anyone had a similar experience and found a way to end it.

Mr. Incognito

Ring your provider and get their number blocked.

I would certainly report it to the guards. They can have a word but it wont go anywhere if you are unwilling to press charges.

bmwguy

Mr. Incognito wrote: »

Ring your provider and get their number blocked.

I would certainly report it to the guards. They can have a word but it wont go anywhere if you are unwilling to press charges.

Would that work with private number?

GuessWhoEh

bmwguy wrote: »

Would that work with private number?

Keep track of the private number. Write down the times they've called, the date etc etc. Bring it too the Guards. If it seems easier, send your ex a quick and firm text. Keep the message to prove you've asked them to stop contacting you. If they reply, do not respond back. You've made it clear to leave you alone.

You could always switch numbers if that seems like a fair idea?

homerjay2005

NavalDaniel wrote: »

My ex won't stop calling me on a private number. We ended it a month ago, and they call daily. Sometimes they call 8 times , and I've to turn my phone off, which is harmful to my business.

I don't want to get the guards involved, or lead them on by answering but anyone had a similar experience and found a way to end it.

are you sure its them? have you answered and ask them to stop?

njs030

How do you know it's your ex and have you asked them to stop?
The guards can't do anything unless you've asked the person to stop and they've ignored you.

LegacyUser

notjustsweet wrote: »

The guards can't do anything unless you've asked the person to stop and they've ignored you.

This is just not true.

OP, I'd encourage you to report it to the Gards. The fact that a number is blocked only means the recipient can't see it, all the data is still there for the phone company, accessible for investigation, potential prosecution and blocking if necessary.

If you're on a windows or android phone, you can block all withheld numbers. That may not suit your business needs though. Similarly, changing your number may not be an option for business reasons. If neither works, then I would again suggest you report it before it escalates.

zoobizoo

IF it's coming up private number, there is a possibility it's an automated call from a customer service or market research company. The calls are made automatically, you pick up but they might not have the staff on hand to speak with you... that's one scenario.

Alternatively it is a 'crank' stalking call, you could go to the Gardai. I've had to do this before. They contact your provider and find out who is calling you. Mine happened to be a pay as you go so they weren't able to find out who it was.

leggo

Guessed wrote: »

This is just not true.

OP, I'd encourage you to report it to the Gards. The fact that a number is blocked only means the recipient can't see it, all the data is still there for the phone company, accessible for investigation, potential prosecution and blocking if necessary.

If you're on a windows or android phone, you can block all withheld numbers. That may not suit your business needs though. Similarly, changing your number may not be an option for business reasons. If neither works, then I would again suggest you report it before it escalates.

Wrong, at least about the Gardai. Harassment laws over here are painfully bad, to the point you nearly need to be in physical danger before the Gardai will intervene. You can get protection orders etc but these are civil matters, are a lot of hassle and will require money if you want to start digging up phone records etc. All the Gardai can really do is make note of it - for if the situation escalates in future - and offer you some words of advice/support (and even then they likely won't do very much there either).

I'd directly and firmly ask that he stop with a threat of legal action if he doesn't (he doesn't need to know the law isn't great). Then, if it continues, start thinking about what you'll need to do logistically with your business to change numbers, e.g. can you text all regular clients to let them know, change advertisements with a new number, not publish your number publicly etc.

LegacyUser

leggo wrote: »

Wrong, at least about the Gardai. Harassment laws over here are painfully bad, to the point you nearly need to be in physical danger before the Gardai will intervene. You can get protection orders etc but these are civil matters, are a lot of hassle and will require money if you want to start digging up phone records etc. All the Gardai can really do is make note of it - for if the situation escalates in future - and offer you some words of advice/support (and even then they likely won't do very much there either).
.

Yeah.... see, I'm not wrong and there probably isn't a person in the country who knows more about this than I do, it's my job to know and to make sure other people do theirs too. Your assessment is total nonsense and very misleading to the OP. Protection (and similar) orders aren't civil matters, aren't hassle and it costs victims nothing at all to access phone records in the context of a complaint of criminal behaviour, not one penny. You don't need to be in imminent physical danger for intervention and harassment laws are actually quite useful in this country, we're far better than many countries in that respect.

To be frank, you shouldn't be posting stuff like you have, you're perpetuating myths and misleading victims of crime.

OP, I stand over what I said in my first post and I would encourage you to make a complaint at this stage.

Miaireland

Are you sure it is your ex calling from a Private number or it other businesses/clients. If you know it is your ex you could ask that a Garda has a quiet word with them and tell them stop. Otherwise you can ask your Solicitor to send them a cease and desist letter telling them to stop ringing you. (I am not sure how much this costs).

leggo

Guessed wrote: »

Yeah.... see, I'm not wrong and there probably isn't a person in the country who knows more about this than I do, it's my job to know and to make sure other people do theirs too. Your assessment is total nonsense and very misleading to the OP. Protection (and similar) orders aren't civil matters, aren't hassle and it costs victims nothing at all to access phone records in the context of a complaint of criminal behaviour, not one penny. You don't need to be in imminent physical danger for intervention and harassment laws are actually quite useful in this country, we're far better than many countries in that respect.

To be frank, you shouldn't be posting stuff like you have, you're perpetuating myths and misleading victims of crime.

OP, I stand over what I said in my first post and I would encourage you to make a complaint at this stage.

So you work with the Ombudsman then is what you're saying, since you're bringing qualifications into it? May I suggest, then, that you're perhaps too close to the situation to give the authoratative advice you seek. I speak having both been close to people who've suffered harassment of this nature and been let down by the system (not the individual Gardai involved, I hasten to add) and some of the people closest to me being involved with enforcing it and honestly assessing the restrictions put upon them. So while the theory may be there, the practical reality isn't necessarily following up to that. If you work with the Ombudsman as you're implying, you probably do know more about the procedural process than I do. But what I know is that not once in any of the cases I've seen or been involved in has the situation ended with one simple phone call to the Gardai, not once. That's what the OP is looking for. They all ended, most by Garda intervention, once when an ex treated a protection order by his former partner essentially as "not touching, can't get mad" and eventually got bored, but all of that was eventually.

I'm not suggesting the OP doesn't contact the Gardai, I'm merely saying that doing that as a sole approach to fix all will likely end up in a prolonged process that won't offer immediate help and that she'd be best served doing it as part of a multi-step plan against this. It's affecting her business, she wants results now, not down the line. The Gardai can help, but not necessarily immediately.

LegacyUser

I received 5 calls yesterday, so I text them to say stop. There parents rang me and told me that my ex wasn't ringing me. It could be a business call, very annoying if so because i rang my provider and the call centre girl said they can't release information on who's ringing.

njs030

NavalDaniel wrote: »

I received 5 calls yesterday, so I text them to say stop. There parents rang me and told me that my ex wasn't ringing me. It could be a business call, very annoying if so because i rang my provider and the call centre girl said they can't release information on who's ringing.

Answer it and find out maybe?

LegacyUser

leggo wrote: »

<Mod Snip> Please do not quote entire posts. It just clogs up the thread with duplicate text and makes it difficult for touch site users.

No, you haven't go it right about the source of my knowledge and even if you were, that would in no way make me "too close" to the situation, that you would offer such assumptions and such an illogical conclusion shows how little knowledge you're basing your posts on. You're still not right about your assessment of the processes to be applied and you gave legal advice that had absolutely no grounding in reality, none whtsoever. You seriously need to stop offering the kind of misinformation you're propagating, you are doing a total disservice to the OP and any other victim of harassment that reads this thread.

LincolnHawk

It's probably a recruiter

Ursus Horribilis

NavalDaniel wrote: »

I received 5 calls yesterday, so I text them to say stop. Their parents rang me and told me that my ex wasn't ringing me. It could be a business call, very annoying if so because I rang my provider and the call centre girl said they can't release information on who's ringing.

What's not clear is how you know for definite it's your ex who's making these calls? Do you answer the phone? If so, what happens next? Does your ex speak? Is there silence? What?

Perhaps next time they ring, tell them you're logging the call times and you will be going to the guards. That might be enough to stop the crank caller.

As for the parents ringing you, I wouldn't read too much into that. I doubt your ex would want to confess to mum and dad that he/she has been calling you all the time.

OldMrBrennan83

This post has been deleted.

Ursus Horribilis

That'd work if the OP didn't have a business