Past relationship problems advice

Amimijane

Hi guys ,

I just wanted some outside advice . Myself and my partner are getting married next year . He is my best friend , my life . Honestly I couldn't ask for better and we are genuinely happy together . Only one thing bother me . In the beginning we were both in out last year of college and he cheated with ex-girlfriends . One of them being a distant cousin of mine. We moved past it as this was all in the first few weeks of us dating . To this day I never confronted them over it and I just wanted to know did I make the right decision not to attack these girls for going cheating with my partner . Trust me I attacked him for it . I just gave a break from my partner when this happened and we got back together a little while after I found out . Though we are getting married next year I feel I never got to express my anger to these girls that I know . I just moved on without saying a word to them . Does this make me a coward or did I make the right decision in just moving on with it all ?

Ann84

Hi OP - in short no you absolutely not 'attack' or vent on these girls for several reasons.
1. Your boyfriend was in a relationship - HE was the one cheating - not them.
2. It's several years later and your getting married to this man - bringing this up now would appear as if you have not moved on from these incidents and would likely get tongues wagging about the whole thing again... a year before your wedding.
3. You'all probably come across as a bit mad...
4. One or both of these girls may actually tell you to go jump in a river on account of point 1. and to be honest, they would well be in their rights. Then how angry would you feel?

You decided to forgive your partner for his behaviour, that was your decision, leave other people out of your relationship. If you want to vent, go to a counsellor. This doesn't make you weak and who cares what anyone thinks, you decided to let it go, so that's what you need to do!

LegacyUser

Last year of college; What age were ye all- 22 or 23?
How many years later is this now?
These were ex-girlfriends of his, they were there before you came on the scene, it's not like they purposely targeted *your* boyfriend specifically. & how were they to know your relationship would evolve into a serious, long-term thing? You don't know what they thought or were told at the time.
Enjoy your engagement & wedding.
Look forward, not backwards.

Teyla Emmagan

Attack them? Are you mad? Or a complete gurrier? Your partner is the one that cheated. For all you know those girls thought he was single. Unless you want to live your life like something in a trashy tabloid then move on.