Need Perspective

LegacyUser

Going unreg on this,

I have a few issues....small in comparison to some things discussed here, but bothering me all the same.

I have a good job, pays well and for the most part I'm content in it. Recently applied for the "dream job", got knocked back. Before I received the news I was quite philosophical about things...looked very much to the healthy balance that I currently am lucky to enjoy with work and life, realised that I'm fortunate to have the salary I'm on etc. etc. Here's the crux of my problem, I know others have claimed credit for my work and are now getting ahead on the back of my work and ideas. So now it's really getting to me and keeps bringing up thoughts of end of career for me and others will take the credit. Do I let go of this and accept it or do something else? I am tempted now to just do the bare minimum and the ideas that I had for the future in my current role, well I will just bury them.

The other problem I have is well I feel that I've given too much of myself to work. If I'm not working I'm looking after my daughter. That's correct and proper that I should spend time looking after her and lots of it!...I'm not disputing that and again I refer to my earlier paragraph where I talk about feeling lucky to have a very healthy work/life balance. The crux here is that I now have no hobbies or pastimes and this is really limiting my social interaction with others. How do you think I should solve this? I enjoy time alone also as I'm not a hermit but am somewhat introverted.

Final question....are both of these issues linked? Do I need to solve them both or the second one first? Sorry if this is clinical, but I'm a black and white type of person....

fizzypish

Learn the lesson about others taking your credit and don't let it happen in future (sorry thats such an obvious statement). Take a step back from work. Do less (not less than you should but just what you need to) and make sure you stamp your name all over whats yours. If you get **** for doing less then simply say promote me if you want me to do more. I'm doing what I need to. I may be talking BS as I don't know your situation.

The whole I work and look after my family thing is tough. Your not the number 1 priority in your own life and that sucks. I'm not in that situation (don't have kids) so I can't give you much input.

JackTaylorFan

Just reading it, one possible link between your job and you lack of social life seems to be your obvious poor relations with your current colleagues. You obviously mistrust a lot of them - perhaps with good reason. What else is going on, I wonder. You say you are relatively happy in your job, but at the same time you want out - otherwise why would you be applying for another one at all - the "dream job" as you called it.

Lots of questions went through my mind reading this post- one being: is it a case in your workplace that you are not part of the clique and therefore feel left out of some social interactions?

I must admit: I didn't read your post in the voice of somebody who was content in their job at all; you sounded rather unhappy in that environment. In truth, you almost sounded defeated and resigned to it all - seemingly you have adopted a "but the pay is good" kinda attitude to it.

Sorry, maybe I have got this completely wrong and far be it for me to offer career guidance to anyone - but you did ask for a different perspective...

As for your lack of hobbies and pastimes - well, surely you have some interest in something, no? That would be concerning in and of itself.

And I may as well say it before somebody beats me to it: Check out meetup.com - maybe you'll find a group that shares some interest of yours.

Finally, you mentioned a daughter but no partner or wife - is there something missing in your life from a romantic aspect? Again, I am doing a lot of presuming here - I apologise if it's way off the mark.