All one way with friends

edmac33

Does anyone every feel like only for them doing all the organising and texting, calling etc for social nights out with their friends that it would never happen?

Again this Christmas and all throughout the year it's all me pushing and trying to get my friends and their wives and partners out together, we all get along as far as I know but when we do go out a few of my friends always say to me well done it's always you making things happen. I'm fed up cause I just wish someone else would do it for a change instead it's always me. thing is too that they go out without asking me as well and I find out after I organise a night out that some of the have been out and never asked me.

Just wondering if anyone else has these little problems. It's always me texting them too to chat or calling to them no one ever seems to call to me unless they need something done etc. but socially they will pass my house and go to other friends or pass my house and go for a drink to the local without asking me.

Mr. FoggPatches

We meet up without you all the time.

DEFTLEFTHAND

Not everybody is a good organiser. Sometimes a group of friends needs somebody like yourself to arrange social meetups. I'm useless at it, I rely on others to make calls or to book a restaurant etc.

Your Face

Maybe they don't like you.

Agricola

Some people are dog lazy about this stuff and will make zero effort no matter how long it's been since a meetup. This is compounded by the fact that they know theres always one industrious soul who will handle all that admin anyway so let them at it!

Ficheall

edmac33 wrote: »

Does anyone every feel like only for them doing all the organising and texting, calling etc for social nights out with their friends that it would never happen?

Again this Christmas and all throughout the year it's all me pushing and trying to get my friends and their wives and partners out together, we all get along as far as I know but when we do go out a few of my friends always say to me well done it's always you making things happen. I'm fed up cause I just wish someone else would do it for a change instead it's always me. thing is too that they go out without asking me as well and I find out after I organise a night out that some of the have been out and never asked me.

Just wondering if anyone else has these little problems. It's always me texting them too to chat or calling to them no one ever seems to call to me unless they need something done etc. but socially they will pass my house and go to other friends or pass my house and go for a drink to the local without asking me.

I empathise, OP. And don't worry - it's not just in your head. It's mathematically proven that your friends have more friends than you do.

QED.
-Dr. Ficheall

pauliebdub

I suspect that they don't really like you. If they are going out by themselves without asking you then it's a surefire sign. If they liked you and enjoyed your company they would invite you. Give the organising a miss for a few months and see what happens.

How close are you to this group of friends?

Trebor176

During my 20s, I probably wasn't the most sociable person. That's not to say that I was anti-social. I wasn't! I just wasn't out every weekend, for example.

Having turned 30, I realised that I needed to do more with my life. I had my 10 year school reunion last year, and I realised that I hadn't seen any of the attendees from my year in those 10 years, despite having them on Facebook since I joined in '09. I know I got on well with everyone in school, even if I was a quiet sort, and, perhaps moody in my teens.

Lately, I have started getting back in touch with some of these, and have been trying to organise some sort of a reunion, even if it's with some that weren't at the reunion. However, it's a one way thing, it would seem. Sure, they say that they're up for it, but it's a case of waiting for so and so to get back. Again, it's not so easy.

I guess it's not just those from school before. I have tried meeting up with others I've met along the way, whether it have been through college, or through previous jobs. Just to catch up with them. But, nothing has happened as yet.

I guess everyone has moved on with their lives, which is totally understandable. I can't expect everyone to drop everything to meet with someone that they haven't seen in so long. It will happen one day, hopefully, but I am going to work on meeting up with as many people as I can in the new year and build back up those friendships I once had!

wakka12

Well I hate to say it but its probably as obvious to you as it is to us that they don't really like you

Stigura

Ed; You're 'Billy No Mates'. Get used to it. Buy a Play Station

Renegade Mechanic

Only for you said they actively thank you for the effort, I'd have just said they obviously don't want to see you, but don't have the spine to tell you where to go.

Shur **** it, take on the responsibility and be proud of it, OP, instead of a being whingey puss.
Most people get off on being that er... "central hub" or whatever. This is your calling in life. You are the human rally point!

_Whimsical_

There's always the chance that they might assume that as you organise things and are proactive about your social life that you're busy or out with other friends when they don't hear from you.
I wouldn't assume they don't like you. If that was the case they'd refuse your overtures and not answer your calls. Some people are just no good at including others. Id say continue as you are but say outright hey I'd like to come next time you're doing that. If they don't pick up on it start concentrating your efforts on new social groups who make you feel included but I wouldn't assume you aren't liked here.