Another Engagement ring thread (down to final two jewellers)

Eoiniom1

Hey

So I have decided to take the big step and drop the knee, will be in the new year so I won't be rushing into this.
I have narrowed it down to either Voltaire or bespoke diamonds. All reviews for both seem to be great so I am finding it hard to choose between the two.
Has anyone here any advice to offer on this? Any personal experiences? dos or don'ts?
Any input appreciated

baby and crumble

Would you not just pick the place that has the ring you want?

Eoiniom1

Both have a really nice selection.

I have a style in mind not one particular ring.

GingerLily

Eoiniom1 wrote: »

Both have a really nice selection.

I have a style in mind not one particular ring.

How would you choose the ring if you had one shop to choose from?
I would suggest doing that, then repeating in the second shop, and comparing the two final rings.

SarahMollie

Would you consider proposing wtih a token ring and then letting your fiance choose?

Eoiniom1

I'm not really a fan of the token ring idea. I feel she would be a little let down knowing I didn't go out and put the effort in to pick one for her. So I will be going down the real ring route.

Both places offer an appointment only service. They both claim that this method keeps their overheads to a minimum and then they can provide best value on their stock.

I will use the usual method of the 4 C's as well as within budget to choose the ring but I was hoping to hear what peoples experience were with these two jewelers, be it good or bad.

I guess I am just looking for advice or guidance from peoples past experiences before I make this big decision.

SarahMollie

Have you seen something you like on either website? I think either of them could get something made also if you're not in a huge rush but know what you want.


Also - do you know her ring size? If you want to go for somewhere with the lowest overheads, have you thought of Blue Nile?

.......

This post has been deleted.

Eoiniom1

I wouldn't really consider the Blue Nile option because I want to be able to view a selection of rings in person and then also the after sale support is close by, although hopefully not required.

The token ring makes a lot of sense but don't the jewelers allow you to change the ring if she doesn't like it? I will need to confirm this but I have seen reviews online that mention this. If they do, then essentially if she doesn't like it it will become a token ring. If they don't, I will be giving your suggestion some serious thought.

SarahMollie

....... wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

I have to say (hopefully without raining on your parade OP) that I struggle to disagree with the above.

My OH proposed earlier this year with a token and I was so happy he did. I'm a bit particular so I don't think he'd want the stress of choosing something on my behalf. I never for one moment thought less of him for not picking something in advance - I just thought he knew me well enough to let me chose myself. Also, he took me somewhere that had sentimental value in itself, so him putting thought into that meant more than him having the real ring.

In any situations where the man had the real ring for the actual proposal, the girlfriend had already hinted at what she wanted so they somewhat knew what they were looking for.

Does she prefer white gold/yellow gold/platinum? Does she want something modern/vintage style? Would she like a coloured stone?

If you really want to chose yourself, maybe get some guidance from one of her friends (one who can keep a secret obviously) as to her taste in jewelry.

Wisesmurf

I used Voltaire a few years ago.

On the subject of token ring, my wife practically told me the ring she wanted so it wasn't needed.:D

I met with Voltaire, was the only customer in the office. The girl had about 50 rings in the style my wife wanted and I was there about an hour going over the different rings.

I liked some of one ring and some of another so they basically made a custom ring and found me a stone.

My wife was delighted and the ring is excellent. I went to loads of shops and didn't feel like they had the same attention and didn't want to buy a ring without seeing it (blue nile).

Voltaire will be getting my business when I next propose. :D

Voltaire Diamonds: Seamus

Hi Eoiniom1, we would be delighted to meet with you again. If you have any further questions before you make your decision please do not hesitate to contact me.
Many thanks for the mention Wisesmurf.
Many thanks
Séamus

SarahMollie

Wisesmurf wrote: »

I used Voltaire a few years ago.

On the subject of token ring, my wife practically told me the ring she wanted so it wasn't needed.:D

I met with Voltaire, was the only customer in the office. The girl had about 50 rings in the style my wife wanted and I was there about an hour going over the different rings.

I liked some of one ring and some of another so they basically made a custom ring and found me a stone.

My wife was delighted and the ring is excellent. I went to loads of shops and didn't feel like they had the same attention and didn't want to buy a ring without seeing it (blue nile).

Voltaire will be getting my business when I next propose. :D

Agree - Blue Nile isnt for everyone! I nearly did it but ultimately fell in love elsewhere. I was considering buying a stone from them and getting the ring made myself - to me this was less scary because the stone at least should have an objective value, and they can be returned if you're not happy. Then I'd be able to get the rest of the ring made with someone I could be hands on with. As you say, maybe for my next engagement :pac:

A girl I work with got an amazing ring from them and has had it valued eslewhere and its worth a small fortune.

Jimmy Garlic

The sooner this engagement ring tradition dies out the better. It is less an expression of love and more an expression of vulgar materialism. It is a relatively new tradition in any case, I don't think anyone bought engagement rings before the late 1930s. The thousands spent on an engagement ring would be better spent on something useful.

Greenduck

I got mine in Bespoke this year and I can highly recommend them. Not too pushy, very knowledgeable to the point.

Eoiniom1

Hi Seamus,  I hope to drop in again in the next week or so. Can you confirm if you guys are happy to exchange the ring if she happened not to like it? 

I know of one couple that used Blue Nile and were extremely happy with their decision to buy online. One independent valuation came back 2k over the actual purchase price, madness.

Voltaire Diamonds: Seamus

Hi Eoiniom1, absolutely no problem exchanging if for any reason your partner does not like it.
Look forward to hearing from you.
Many thanks
Seamus

.......

This post has been deleted.

GingerLily

....... wrote: »

Of course they do - but who is going to tell their excited husband to be that she doesnt like the ring he has spent time and care choosing? Most people would just say nothing and silently wish they had been given the opportunity to choose for themselves.

There is also the aspect that different rings suit different fingers. I was sure I wanted a solitare but they looked terrible on my fingers - it wasnt until I went trying rings on that I found what suited me and it was nothing like any ring I had thought Id like.

The whole day out together choosing a ring is a vitally important part of any engagement imo and you would be denying her a lovely romantic process by choosing the ring on her behalf.

I 100% disagree that choosing the ring is a "vitally important part of any engagement", I hated ring shopping, I just wanted to tell everyone, it was the least pleasant thing to me from the whole process.

I love my ring, and I get compliments all the time about it but I still feel uncomfortable about the price of it, in a way I wish he had surprised so I wouldn't have this guilt.

SarahMollie

....... wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

Well, if you're a regular reader of this form, you will see threads along the line of "I don't want to sound like a wagon but...." from women who are delighted to be engaged, but not happy with the ring. They're usually too afraid to say anything to the fiance, but the whole time its bothering them.

There was one not so long ago where the Man picked it with his mother and it was just totally not to his fiances taste. She took a fair amount of abuse from posters, but if you don't like something, then you don't like it, and in the case of an engagement ring, its a fairly unfortunate situation.

.......

This post has been deleted.

GingerLily

....... wrote: »

Id bet my house on it that MOST people would prefer to be offered the opportunity to choose it themselves. If you dont like ring shopping you could always then say "oh its ok, you choose it!" - but better to have the option than be presented with something you dont like and worse, that doesnt suit.

Choosing your own ring and saying ring shopping is an important part of being engaged are completely diffrent things. You said the latter initially.

And to add, the OP plans to exchange the ring if she doesn't like it, winwin in my book!!

.......

This post has been deleted.

SarahMollie

....... wrote: »

This post has been deleted.

See, this is really interesting because I'm also a big advocate for chosing your own ring, but for totally different reasons.

The whole champagne thing leaves me cold, i refused it (said I didnt drink - lies) because I didn't want to be schmoozed. I also had no intention of ever buying from Applebys or any of the fancy Grafton St Jewelers, because of my perception of how much they have to mark stuff up to justify their overheads. I did a lot of my own research, and even went to a few places myself over a few weeks, and then went back with himself once I'd chosen.

I knew pretty much what I wanted and knew it wasnt going to be cheap! And I'd rather pay for the stone than Grafton St overheads. I ended up getting it in a fairly old school suburban jewelers once I was satisfied. GIA certs and all that of course.

Kinda like what GingerLily said.... if I'd not done my due diligence, the guilt of walking around with it knowing I'd (he'd) paid over the odds would irk me.

I don't mind spending a fair whack of money, but I want to get the most bang for my buck, and that thrils me more than any glass of Champs ever could!

.......

This post has been deleted.

GingerLily

....... wrote: »

I definitely agree re the cost - I didnt even go for something too expensive but I still look at it and think we could have a couple of very nice holidays for it.

I dont even wear my wedding jewellery - Im not a daytime jewellery wearer and all if the rings need to be resized but I just havent gotten round to it......

But I still wouldnt change the whole choosing experience!

That's great that you loved the buying experience, I just thought it was worth letting the OP know that not all women enjoy it.

I think most people know whether or not their other halves would like to choose a ring, I told my partner that I was very self conscious of my hands and that lots of my friends engagement rings didn't suit me before he proposed so he knew that I needed to be there for the buying, but most of the guys I know surprised their partners with rings and the partners were delighted at what good taste their husbands to be had.

Eoiniom1

Thanks to everyone for their input.
You have really opened my eyes, I never would have thought it so important that my girlfriend be there for the choosing of the ring. 
I have decided to go with the token ring and make a full day out for the real thing.

tobdom

Just my 2cents, you may have already considered them....

We (I) got my now wife's engagement ring from Diamant in Dublin. I have zero affiliation to them other than being a happy customer. We went back to Tom to get our wedding rings also (where I discovered 'red' gold having never thought I'd wear a wedding ring other than white gold/platinum), and he was always a pleasure to deal with. They operate in a similar fashion to Voltaire (to the best of my understanding) and will make whatever you (your gf/fiancee) want based on your taste or examples you have to show them. Certs/valuations etc. provided and you definitely get good value for money compared to going to a 'bricks & mortar' jewelers where you're helping to pay their retail overheads.

Not advocating for Diamant over Voltaire (or anyone else), just sharing our experience. Best of luck with it all and congratulations in advance!! :-)

Thegalwayman

How much of a discount can be expectedoff the list price on say a 5k ring, typically?

mcgiggles

Eoiniom1 wrote:

Thanks to everyone for their input. You have really opened my eyes, I never would have thought it so important that my girlfriend be there for the choosing of the ring. I have decided to go with the token ring and make a full day out for the real thing.

My fiance did the whole token ring thing basically because we were going on hols and his jeweller didn't have any he liked so he got him to order more in for him to look at. I didn't want the whole choosing a ring experience. I had an idea in my head of what I thought I wanted, what I got was completely different and I absolutely adore it! We came back from hols engaged and he went back to his jeweller and got my ring.. I still didn't want to go with him. To me him choosing it was a hugely important part of it. A lady I know said "you're mental you have to wear it for the rest of your life, you're mad letting him choose it" (she's a bit of a wagon on the best of days!) To me him choosing it is more special than me choosing it - here this is the ring I want you to ask me to marry you with.. na.. not for me at all!!
2 sides to every coin :-) you know your girl best OP!

stampydmonkey

Got ours in Bespoke. Very good zero pressure service. Went token engagement ring and worked out a treat too

Choc Chip

Got mine in bespoke but i was also in voltaire. They were both fab and I'd go on the final ring you prefer rather than the place.

Just to provide a counter to some of the previous posts, while i basically told my now-fiance that if he ever proposed i wanted to pick my own ring (I was baffled at the idea someone would pick a ring for me), I know a few girls who were utterly put off by the idea of picking their own ring. They REALLY wanted their other half to make the effort to pick it himself.

Any chance you could get a steer from her? Stick on a film with a big proposal and when it comes on just make a comment about whether she'd be happy having her ring picked for her? That probably depends on how well you can act nonchalant though!

tobdom

Thegalwayman wrote: »

How much of a discount can be expectedoff the list price on say a 5k ring, typically?

You're probably looking at anywhere between a 30 - 50 % saving compared to buying in the traditional 'bricks & mortar' jewelers.

The ring we had made was valued at 35-40% more than what we paid for it.

Voltaire Diamonds: Seamus

Hi Choc Chip, many thanks for the mention. Delighted you found the perfect ring. Hope to see you again in the future.

Congrats again
Séamus