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Chat up lines

  • 05-11-2016 2:52am
    #1
    Ferrari3600
    Closed Accounts Posts: 617 ✭✭✭


    "Get your coat, you've scored."

    "I have some good news"

    "What's that?"

    "You're going home with me tonight".

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZPECFQ4NhE

    Lol. I jest, clearly. Just throwin' it out there for debate. :D


Comments

  • #2
    Didas
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 191 ✭✭Didas


    Ferrari3600 wrote: »
    "Get your coat, you've scored."

    "I have some good news"

    "What's that?"

    "You're going home with me tonight"    .

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hZPECFQ4NhE

    Lol. I jest, clearly. Just throwin' it out there for debate. :D

    Rape culture! Rape culture! :D


  • #3
    Dr Jakub
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 314 ✭✭Dr Jakub


    Talking to a woman without her consent? Louise O'Neill would call this an act of rape.


  • #4
    DEFTLEFTHAND
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,500 ✭✭✭✭DEFTLEFTHAND


    I remember making moves on a girl in a pub one night and she said to me "I thought you were queer."

    I've a bit an effeminate demenour on me at times.


  • #5
    Grayson
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 16,472 ✭✭✭✭Grayson


    Dr Jakub wrote: »
    Talking to a woman without her consent? Louise O'Neill would call this an act of rape.

    We get the ppoint, you took a red pill. Now take a chill pill and try not to turn everything into your personal crusade. This should be a funny thread.



    Back on topic... I love tinder nightmares. Mostly horrible lines but there are some great ones. This one would only work if you're using a phone/facebook/etc...

    https://www.instagram.com/p/BEpBMDcEIfs/

    And if you can't be bothered putting in the effort.
    https://www.instagram.com/p/671NMZkIXx/

    And if you're stupid...
    https://www.instagram.com/p/6v2ltOkITn/

    and I don't have words for this.
    https://www.instagram.com/p/4GAvmtEIRP/

    And finally, if you're a bragger.
    https://www.instagram.com/p/50UCjbkIYm/


  • #6
    Ted111
    Closed Accounts Posts: 990 ✭✭✭Ted111


    'let's not turn a rape into a murder..'


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  • #7
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    Ferrari3600 wrote: »
    Lol. I jest, clearly. Just throwin' it out there for debate. :D

    Bloody hell, this debate could be up there with Vidal v Mailer...


  • #8
    gifted
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,964 ✭✭✭gifted


    I used just say Hello..











    And hope she took pity on me lol lol


  • #9
    Felix Jones is God
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,160 ✭✭✭Felix Jones is God


    Just slap her ass , If she doesn't punch you in the face, she's interested


  • #10
    Burial.
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,131 ✭✭✭Burial.


    My dick just died can I bury it in your arse?


  • #11
    whoopsadoodles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,058 ✭✭✭whoopsadoodles


    God be with the days when a chat up line thread made your belly ache with laughter.

    Now it just pains your eyes from rolling them so far back in your head at the misery that is AH.


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  • #12
    s15r330
    Closed Accounts Posts: 944 ✭✭✭s15r330


    See my friend over there, he wants to know will you go home with me?

    How do you like your eggs in the morning, fertilised?

    Remember this moment, it will lead to the best 2 minutes of your life.


  • #13
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    Do you like cheese cause I'm an easi single


  • #14
    corner of hells
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,419 ✭✭✭corner of hells


    I know im ugly but the light doesn't work in my bed room.


  • #15
    mahamageehad
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,673 ✭✭✭mahamageehad


    Random guy- Want to come back to my place for the ride of your life and pizza?

    Me- No, I'm grand thanks.

    Guy- Why? Don't you like pizza? I'm not sure I could be with a girl that didn't like pizza. Sorry, I'm just going to have to turn you down. Have a great evening.

    After my initial confusion I did laugh to be honest, still one of my favourite chat ups.


  • #16
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    Hi, I'm wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn't have to be

    * I've never used this
    ** unlikely to work


  • #17
    qo2cj1dsne8y4k
    Closed Accounts Posts: 23,646 ✭✭✭✭qo2cj1dsne8y4k


    What has 150 teeth and holds the Incredible Hulk? My zip.


  • #18
    lawlolawl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,678 ✭✭✭lawlolawl


    "Hey cunt, want to fuck?"


  • #19
    mackeire
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,280 ✭✭✭mackeire


    D'ya come here often?


  • #20
    whoopsadoodles
    Closed Accounts Posts: 5,058 ✭✭✭whoopsadoodles


    KERSPLAT! wrote: »
    Hi, I'm wasted but this condom in my pocket doesn't have to be

    * I've never used this
    ** unlikely to work

    Not sure if last two sentences are about the condom :/


  • #21
    KERSPLAT!
    Closed Accounts Posts: 31,152 ✭✭✭✭KERSPLAT!


    whoopsadoodles wrote: »
    Not sure if last two sentences are about the condom :/

    >.>


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  • #22
    Cina
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 2,388 ✭✭✭Cina


    Damn girl, your bone structure is giving my bone structure!


  • #23
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    corner of hells wrote: »
    I know im ugly but the light doesn't work in my bed room.

    I'm using this :pac:


  • #24
    andekwarhola
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 4,639 ✭✭✭andekwarhola


    Never got 'chat up lines'. When I was single, I just started chatting to women. Is this out of fashion now?


  • #25
    Tea-a-Maria
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 736 ✭✭✭Tea-a-Maria


    Is your surname Jacobs? Because you're a cracker!


  • #26
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Do you want to come back to my place. I've got drugs.


  • #27
    Surreptitious
    Registered Users, Registered Users 2 Posts: 8,130 ✭✭✭Surreptitious


    Can I walk you home? That's the most oft used one.


  • #28
    lawlolawl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,678 ✭✭✭lawlolawl


    How's yer bollix.


  • #29
    lawlolawl
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,678 ✭✭✭lawlolawl


    Surreptitious wrote: »
    Do you want to come back to my place. I've got drugs.

    Slow it down there, Cosby.


  • #30
    magentis
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,249 ✭✭✭magentis


    Does this smell like Chloroform to you?


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