Should I ask him for no strings?

LegacyUser

Hi all I'm 30 and met a guy out a few weeks ago. We have been doing a bit of texting back and forth but no mention of meeting up yet. I'm not really in the zone for a relationship at the minute as they've all ended in disaster but it has been a while since I've been with a guy intimately due to this.
I was thinking of asking him if he wants to meet up for some fun as while I think he is very good looking I don't think there is much between us personality wise. There is about two hours of a distance between us so maybe it's a bit far to be going. I've never contemplated doing this before so am unsure how to go about it or even if I should, considering he hasn't asked me to meet up. How do I suggest it to him? Would a guy think it's strange for a girl to suggest a friends with benefits situation on the basis of only meeting once in a bar?

heretochat

I would proceed with caution here if I was you. there are many guys who would love the option of the arrangement you are thinking of. But be careful that you are not used and are 100% sure that this is what you want.

The fact that he hasn't made any contact with you seems to suggest he is not interested in anything at all in my opinion

njs030

heretochat wrote: »

I would proceed with caution here if I was you. there are many guys who would love the option of the arrangement you are thinking of. But be careful that you are not used and are 100% sure that this is what you want.

The fact that he hasn't made any contact with you seems to suggest he is not interested in anything at all in my opinion

Did you read the same post I did? They have been in contact. It is what she wants....why would she be used rather than 2 people having fun!

Op rather than blurting it out why don't you feel out if he's interested a bit more first? Next time you're talking make the conversation more flirtatious and see if he responds.

2 hours is quite a distance though it would take organising and sleepovers rather than spontaneity. It would make it all a lot more datey especially if you don't get on that well!

Xterminator

heretochat wrote: »

But be careful that you are not used

you what now? did you read the same post as me?

OP - i agree with the poster above, test the waters, & flirt away. if its reciprocated , go for it.

i wouldn't bother with a big chat until you have hooked up - a couple of times. they you can tell him what you are looking for from the relationship and vice versa.

Mr. Incognito

As a guy if I got that messaged I'd be flattered-

I say go for it

Dr Crayfish

You've nothing to lose by putting your agenda out there in a subtle way. Just because he's a bloke he's not definitely going to bite though, you didn't say much of your meeting but he may not fancy you, believe it or not some of us men need to actually fancy a girl to have sex with them, so be prepared for a dismissive response. Nothing to lose though.

forgodssake

Go for it !

stop animal cruelty

Go for it, I had a chance to do the same a while ago but didn't have the balls...u only live once 😇

LegacyUser

Hi OP: I am a woman. Be sure that it's what you want, and if it is, then ask. I propositioned a guy to the same having ended up with him a few times after a night out. I couldn't believe how much courage it took me, and although he declined, at least I had an answer !
Best of luck xx

Witchie

As most say, go for it.

I used to do this a few years back when I was a hotter young thing coz my kids were my priority and I couldn't give time to a relationship. The benefits of having a friend with benefits far away is that you can organise to meet in a hotel half way and it is more fun and at least you know you won't have the embarrassment of bumping into him in the local shop when your hair is a mess and you are wearing your baggy trackie bottoms.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to go this route as you have needs and they are best met with someone you like, feel comfortable with and can trust than with just some randomer.

Best of luck .