Online Recognition..

Piggystardust

Hi Guys,

Quick one here, I stumbled upon a guy I recognise on OK Cupid (Cringe), turns out he's a friend of an old friend. We were introduced years ago and I thought he was absolutely gorgeous but at that time we were both in relationships. I also thought he was way out of my league, this guy is a knock out.

We've randomly met over the years at sessions but only briefly and all through our mutual friend. I feel ridiculous writing this as we're both in our 30's but he makes me feel like a giggling schoolgirl. I don't know him but judging by his profile and things I know about him, we'd get along like a house on fire.

Would it be weird to write to him? I saw him online and was thinking of just writing him a friendly message?!

I'm a goodloking girl, hope that doesn't sound vain because I'm not but this guy is seriously hot and I'm worried he won't respond or will think it's weird or awkward on account of our mutual friend.

Am I over thinking this...should I forget it or should I just do it?!!

Thanks dudes

Killergreene

Go for it. Nothing to lose only the regret you'll have if you don't!

Piggystardust

Ahhh you reckon?? If he doesn't repsond I'll hold you personally responsible;)

If I don't do it this evening with a bit of vino courage then I never will.. should I keep it friendly, what do I say?!

Wompa1

Why not get in touch through your friend?

nhunter100

Most guys would be thrilled if a woman made the first move. Go for it, what's the worst that could happen.

njs030

nhunter100 wrote: »

Most guys would be thrilled if a woman made the first move. Go for it, what's the worst that could happen.

If they found the woman attractive....if not I don't think it makes a difference.

Op if you've seen him he's probably seen you, added to that if you've known him a long time and he's never shown interest it probably is an answer in itself.

By all means say hello but keep it friendly and see what happens, don't rush in.

Piggystardust

notjustsweet wrote: »

If they found the woman attractive....if not I don't think it makes a difference.

Op if you've seen him he's probably seen you, added to that if you've known him a long time and he's never shown interest it probably is an answer in itself.

By all means say hello but keep it friendly and see what happens, don't rush in.

I haven't known him a long time, I don't know him at all actually! We've met over the years about 3 times at sessions but I was always with my now ex-boyfriend and he was always with his girlfriend. We've been introduced but don't know each other at all.

I sent him a friendly message. I don't expect anything to happen really but I believe in taking risks when it comes to love. Life is too short to play it safe all the time. Fingers crossed he replies but if not I won't be losing any sleep over it!

njs030

Piggystardust wrote: »

I haven't known him a long time, I don't know him at all actually! We've met over the years about 3 times at sessions but I was always with my now ex-boyfriend and he was always with his girlfriend. We've been introduced but don't know each other at all.

I sent him a friendly message. I don't expect anything to happen really but I believe in taking risks when it comes to love. Life is too short to play it safe all the time. Fingers crossed he replies but if not I won't be losing any sleep over it!

Oh sorry I misunderstood your op. Good luck!!

Piggystardust

I do agree with you though about men only being happy the girl made the first move if they found her attractive, otherwise who cares really. It's like a guy I don't find attractive asking me out, flattering but that's about it. Whereas if a guy I fancied asked me out I'd be doing cartwheels with elation!!

Now that I don't have a few glasses of wine on board, I wish I hadn't actually messaged him. I don't know if he's replied yet cos I'm too scared to check! Why can't dating just be easy!!!

njs030

Piggystardust wrote: »

I do agree with you though about men only being happy the girl made the first move if they found her attractive, otherwise who cares really. It's like a guy I don't find attractive asking me out, flattering but that's about it. Whereas if a guy I fancied asked me out I'd be doing cartwheels with elation!!

Now that I don't have a few glasses of wine on board, I wish I hadn't actually messaged him. I don't know if he's replied yet cos I'm too scared to check! Why can't dating just be easy!!!

The trick is to not get too invested.
Treat everyone like a new friend and always keep your options open and talk to multiple people until you have the "exclusive" chat.
Go and message a few more people so you aren't waiting for him.

Dial Hard

Piggystardust wrote:

Now that I don't have a few glasses of wine on board, I wish I hadn't actually messaged him. I don't know if he's replied yet cos I'm too scared to check! Why can't dating just be easy!!!

Seriously, OP, you are way overthinking this. If he's on OK Cupid then he's (presumably) looking to meet someone so I don't know why you're freaking out so much about whether or not it was appropriate to message him.

You've sent him a message. He either replies or he doesn't. If he does, happy days. If he doesn't, you're absolutely no worse off than before you sent it. So chill the beans. It's just a message.

Piggystardust

Dial Hard wrote: »

Seriously, OP, you are way overthinking this. If he's on OK Cupid then he's (presumably) looking to meet someone so I don't know why you're freaking out so much about whether or not it was appropriate to message him.

You've sent him a message. He either replies or he doesn't. If he does, happy days. If he doesn't, you're absolutely no worse off than before you sent it. So chill the beans. It's just a message.

You're right. I'm a total over-thinker. Thanks for the advice guys:)