Query re anxiety

Lambanna

Hi all, just wanted to link in with people to see if they have experienced similar experience to me over last 6 months and how they dug themselves out of the situation.

To cut a long story short have always had an element of health anxiety in my life but luckily have very rarely been ill so never had much of an impact on my life to date until this year. At end of Feb this year I was gripped by this feeling of constant tension, OCD thoughts on health and anxiety. At that time I had been working long hours in work, was looking forward to our first born child due to arrive in august which has safely thankfully but outside of that had a very happy life.

Tried to struggle through for a monthly and a half before making an appointment to see a psychiatrist who recommended cbt and anti d medication. I stayed away from anti-d tablets at time and did cbt, exercised a massive amount (dropped 2 stone) and tried to learn meditation etc. now my thought process did become more rational but still my body to this date feels as though someone has their foot on adrenaline pump. My general health is good, blood pressure is a little high but this is due to anxiety as my blood pressure up until few this year was always good, have had full health check up down and everything is fine. I guess it's my subconscious still triggering something underneath that is causing the tension. I didn't think I was depressed but had hugely lost confidence in myself (felt real annoyance with myself for allowing this to happen), even social situations I started becoming uncomfortable within which was very strange for me. As a result I made the decision to try anti d's 3 weeks ago, I know they take time to build up and at the moment I am okish, still ansty but mostly perplexed as to how this came to pass.

Didn't take time off work and struggled through but maybe an element of depression has crept in a little as I am starting to think will this ever pass.

Has anyone else experienced this before and what did you find helped, am still exercising and doing therapy, just want the old me back for myself my wife and my new born.

Mayboy

Hi,

I suffered from anxiety and panic quite badly. Constantly felt between total exhaustion and mental fatigue. I gave meditation a go - I used Jon Kabat Zinns book and I did it every day. I also got a CD with a daily body scan meditation on it which I did early each morning and late before bed. Iwent for CBT and got a good psychotherapist. Between all of that I recovered I'm glad to say and meditation is a big part of my life now.

If you can 'get' meditation without pushing yourself to 'learn it' if that makes sense then I found it becomes a really good thing to have n your life.

Good luck!

Lambanna

Thanks Mayboy, I'll check that book out - trying to get into meditation but need to be more disciplined re practise which I'm working on - sometimes I struggle with racing thoughts during practise. Signed up for a mindfulness course as well, really threw me for a loop - my gp thinks it was almost a mini breakdown as he felt stress pushed me over as I then found making even small decisions stressful since end of February. I do have a tendency to over analyse as well which doesn't help!!!! Gp and pyschiatrist felt meds will help calm my body/mind so all the stuff I am doing can sink in better, never realised power of mind until this year, something I always took for granted but no longer.

Fakediamond

Hi Lambanna, could there be unresolved stuff from your childhood that's impacting on you, especially as you're having a child of your own now. I don't have personal experience of this, but it's often a factor. Of course it could just be an overload of life stresses, work, baby, mortgage, only you will know and can take steps to reduce the stressors.

Sounds like you're taking action to resolve it so that's the most positive thing you can do for now. Keep working on finding the right combination of therapies for you.

StanleyOllie

Hi... I dont think there are many people who get away without having anxiety at some point in their life. Many dont mention it but its very common with changes and stresses in our lives.
You are very aware of your anxiety and are willing to do something to help yourself. Well done.
Having a child is a huge change and a huge pressure. A welcome addition to the family but all of a sudden you have a new life to bring up and be responsible for so this may have contributed to your anxiety.
I recommend to try the meds. You can be worse for the first few weeks on them but hopefully they kick in about 6 weeks. That will give you a chance to recover and build your confidence again. Keep doing all the other stuff and dont come off meds till your doctor recommends. You will be fine. You will find yourself again and it makes you stronger and more empathetic to others around you. You never know whats going on in other peoples lives.
Congrats on the baby and hope you begin to enjoy your life again very soon.

Lambanna

Thanks fakediamond and Stanleyollie, I know from discussing with a therapist that I have loss issues from my childhood (3 very close family members passed away within a year) when I was 6 so reckon it must be fear of sudden loss that drives my fears but learning to accept this is proving tough. I also tend to be a people pleaser so can't say no which can make situations tougher or more pressured than they should be, have to learn to curb this!!!! Meds haven't kicked in yet but as you point out they will help build my confidence back as that has been crushed since this started, lost belief in my ability to act normally etc. Also became very self focused and selfish which was unusual for me as I would have been seen as empathatic and generous to others before this. I am lucky in that I have an incredibly supportive wife and family behind me, appreciate your kind words gives me more hope I can put this behind me and move on.