Second chance?

The Young Wan

A guy u was seeing from college and I recently got back in touch. He told me about a new job coming up he thought if be good for, and we have been speaking from there since. As nothing really came from two weeks of "seeing each other", I wouldn't rush to call him an ex.

I do though have the 'what if' train of thought now. We'll both be living in Dublin soon, and when we did end it was on quite good terms (despite my removing him from social media for a while - though he did say he had still been keeping track via his work account).

Is it worth asking him to meet for maybe dinner or a few drinks, or should I just let bygones be bygones?

Yellow pack crisps

The Young Wan wrote: »

A guy u was seeing from college and I recently got back in touch. He told me about a new job coming up he thought if be good for, and we have been speaking from there since. As nothing really came from two weeks of "seeing each other", I wouldn't rush to call him an ex.

I do though have the 'what if' train of thought now. We'll both be living in Dublin soon, and when we did end it was on quite good terms (despite my removing him from social media for a while - though he did say he had still been keeping track via his work account).

Is it worth asking him to meet for maybe dinner or a few drinks, or should I just let bygones be bygones?

What have you got to lose? Nothing and don't go by some philosophy that it doesn't work out second time as much as it fails it also can equally succeed and if it doesn't? so what and move on.

The Young Wan

Yeah, that's a good point. I just wish I knew how to broach the subject without sonding clingy/needy

Ursus Horribilis

How about waiting until you're both back in Dublin first. Then ask him if he fancies meeting up for a cup of coffee/a few drinks. See how it goes from there.

Yellow pack crisps

Ask him on a date! If he thinks that's clingy or needy he isn't worth your time!

The Young Wan

He's a Kilkenny man, I'm from Waterford. For the match at the weekend I wagered pints on the loser

"If you want pints you can just ask me"

But I don't know in what way he'd see it - going as a friend, or as a date. DAMN MENS.

njs030

The Young Wan wrote: »

He's a Kilkenny man, I'm from Waterford. For the match at the weekend I wagered pints on the loser

"If you want pints you can just ask me"

But I don't know in what way he'd see it - going as a friend, or as a date. DAMN MENS.

Go for the pints see what the vibe is!!

The Young Wan

I'm thinking to text him tomorrow and ask if he wants to meet at the weekend. But my heart is in my mouth doing so.

I don't take to rejection well (does anyone,really) and I know if I do get a no, or he makes any reference to it not being a date, my self confidence will take a huge knock.

Does anyone have any tips?

njs030

Just do it. Worst case it's not a date and then you know. He's still a friend!!!
You move on and meet someone else without wondering about him...

Big Bag of Chips

You get on well. You're friends. He's done you a favour. Why not just meet up with no pressure on yourself to call it "a date"? First meeting up after a while of not seeing each other can simply be a catch up. I'd say one way or another he's unlikely to be over thinking it as much as you are. The longer you build it up the more susceptible you are to feeling hurt if it doesn't pan out the way you've built it up in your head.

Don't build it up in your head!

Meet up, have a laugh, and see what naturally happens.

ETA: You owe him a few pints anyway after the match!

Rikand

The Young Wan wrote: »

Yeah, that's a good point. I just wish I knew how to broach the subject without sonding clingy/needy

He's the one who been following you on social media for a while.... He's already the needy one. You have nothing to worry about.

Besides it's been a month since your original post. You both still haven't met up. He's gonna think he's friendzoned as it is at this stage so why not meet up and see how the vibe is

ManOfMystery

The Young Wan wrote: »

A guy u was seeing from college and I recently got back in touch. He told me about a new job coming up he thought if be good for, and we have been speaking from there since. As nothing really came from two weeks of "seeing each other", I wouldn't rush to call him an ex.

I do though have the 'what if' train of thought now. We'll both be living in Dublin soon, and when we did end it was on quite good terms (despite my removing him from social media for a while - though he did say he had still been keeping track via his work account).

Is it worth asking him to meet for maybe dinner or a few drinks, or should I just let bygones be bygones?

You have nothing to lose by trying it, but I'd wonder why nothing really came of it first time round - did neither of you make the effort or was it circumstances like location etc?

The Young Wan

ManOfMystery wrote: »

You have nothing to lose by trying it, but I'd wonder why nothing really came of it first time round - did neither of you make the effort or was it circumstances like location etc?

It was timing. He wasn't looking for something back then, we were both in final year of college and I guess we just didn't have the energy to commit to it.

njs030

Thinking about it a bit op if he was interested I think he would have said something himself by now it's been a few weeks. You've already mentioned it, he had a chance to run with it and didn't. I don't think you're going to get the answer you're looking for.
Maybe settle for friendly and see what, if anything develops?

The Young Wan

Perhaps, notjustsweet.

I'd press the point further but I've been put on a ban by the category mods.

Taltos

Mod Note
This and the other 3 recent threads have all now been closed due to breaching our charter.

OP you have not been banned from PI/RI, and are free to contribute to other threads. Starting another thread though in the next few months will though result in moderator action. This is a strictly moderated forum and all rule breaches are viewed dimly.