Moving house in third trimester/newborn

Gatica

We've currently a situation that our neighbours got new pets. It was always loud enough cos of the rubbish boom-years construction and sound isolation, but now we've also a dog to listen to. We're finding it hard to sleep and decided we'd just bite the bullet and move.

We didn't take into account the shortage of appropriate rental houses and the huge rental increase. We'd given our landlord notice, which he accepted without any issues. Now we've realised that we'll be paying >50% in rent and it's hard to find anything anyway. ....so we've decided to just buy something. We've only 15 weeks left til baby arrives. Are we crazy?

It seemed sensible when we first came up with the idea but now with maternity leave looming and extra cost of rental, it doesn't seem as appealing. We've also gotta pick a place within a short time-frame, which is tougher than I thought it would be. We've made an offer on a house but I don't know if/when they'll consider/accept it. Since it could take months to process a purchase, I think we'll just need to suck it up and ask landlord to let us stay longer. I'm just bricking it now, as otherwise we'd end up moving to in-laws before baby and possibly be there during labour and for weeks thereafter. Anyone doing the gentlebirth program would know how important it is to feel safe and comfortable during those labouring hours for a successful drug-free birth.

missvicky

Hi Gatica, I moved while my first baby was only 8 weeks old and never thought I'd be in a more stressful position however went through a similar situation while expecting my second baby and we also decided to take the pluge and buy. We were lucky enough to find a house we both loved fairly quickly however it took months to get everything sorted. We had given notice to LL and then moved in with my parents and I must say it was extremely stressfull getting everything moved out of the rented house and finding storage for the larger items. We finally got the keys to our house with only a matter of weeks to go. I found myself exhausted for weeks afterwards which is normal but I think with the added pressure of all the moving it delayed my recovery. I would recommend really weighing up your options before making a decision. Best of luck with everything

dori_dormer

I've done exactly what you are describing, including the gentle birth! We moved homes From abroad, with then intention of moving In with my mum for a few weeks and finding a rental. Choice was poor, and we saw a house we loved so decided to buy. We had 18 weeks til due date and they said we could close in 8. But we hit delay after delay. We have a toddler too and my mother can be quite difficult ( treating me like a maid) . I did have a meltdown at one stage and told my husband we are renting and moving out because I couldn't cope any more and refused to have the baby in her house. Somehow with teh tracks I got over it! Made my peace. Baby is 3 weeks old and my mum has been amazing. Her and my toddler have really bonded and she's been a great baby sitter when needed for hospital appointments etc even tho she works. We really couldn't have done it without her!
My gentle birth still happened perfectly! We hope to get the keys to the new place next week!
Now I don't know if I could have coped with living with my dad, or my in laws. But I can't say the whole thing didn't have its stressful times, but we got through IT and think we are all pretty close now. I just had to give up on perfection and make peace with how things were turning out

Gatica

Thanks for the input. I guess there's no way to avoid stress when talking about moving with the added complications of expecting a baby.
We're going to go ahead and move house to a rental while continuing to look to buy. I get on great with the in-laws, they're wonderful people and I know will be really supportive and do everything to help. I guess from reading the gentlebirth and other birth stories it seemed like a few found it very stressful and off-putting (think tightening up fight-or-flight reflex when stressed) when relatives began panicking around them when they started into labour or waters broke. While one would want the relaxed "romantic" atmosphere with soothing music, warm bath and comfort to grunt or wail if needs be :rolleyes:, if you know what I mean... not something you'd be comfortable doing with others around.

lazygal

It will be ten times easier to move before the baby comes than afterwards. The real work starts once they arrive-I look back at a time before I had children and I wonder how I ever thought I didn't have time to do stuff.

dori_dormer

Gatica wrote: »

Thanks for the input. I guess there's no way to avoid stress when talking about moving with the added complications of expecting a baby.
We're going to go ahead and move house to a rental while continuing to look to buy. I get on great with the in-laws, they're wonderful people and I know will be really supportive and do everything to help. I guess from reading the gentlebirth and other birth stories it seemed like a few found it very stressful and off-putting (think tightening up fight-or-flight reflex when stressed) when relatives began panicking around them when they started into labour or waters broke. While one would want the relaxed "romantic" atmosphere with soothing music, warm bath and comfort to grunt or wail if needs be :rolleyes:, if you know what I mean... not something you'd be comfortable doing with others around.

Lol my mum was definitly panicking a bit, but I just zoned her out! Just stayed in my room, listening to my tracks for the first while. Then met her in the kitchen the hour before we left. She helped a bit while my hubby was getting everything ready. But then I had a really quick labour only 4 hrs start to finish. Part of the 'training' is ignoring any activity around you. But I'm sure if it was a long labour it wouldn't be fun to have in laws etc staring at you and watching your every move!

Gatica

Well, on the upside we got our offer accepted and have started on all the paperwork for mortgage, solicitor and surveyor. We're away for a couple of weeks so want to get anything that we can signed and posted so as to get the ball rolling. If we're very lucky we'll have the place before the babs.
Decided not to move til we're moving into our house. Our landlord has also conceded us to stay til mid-October, so fingers crossed all the stars line up etc...
I'm still a little nervous but at least there's a lot of excitement about having our own place and the possibility of things maybe going right.

Gatica

So things are moving slowly... We've the mortgage pack, some insurance and mortgage protection quotes, the folio but there are things outstanding that the sellers and their solicitor need to get sorted.

I'm losing hope of moving in before Dday. Thinking of maybe renting somewhere else temporarily. Is that crazy? Or should we just go with the in-laws, and be done with it? They're just further out of town (would require more planning for getting to the hospital) and the bed is quite soft and smaller than ours and I already have problems sleeping in a double with all my pillows and support!

fits

IS there no way you can stay in your current rental until things are sorted? I would be limiting the moving to once if I could.

Gatica

No We changed our notice 3 times already, should've just stayed until we had a contract, but didn't plan it well as initially planned to move and rent. There's now viewings at our place, so wouldn't be right to change it again.

Beanybabog

Gatica wrote: »

So things are moving slowly... We've the mortgage pack, some insurance and mortgage protection quotes, the folio but there are things outstanding that the sellers and their solicitor need to get sorted.

I'm losing hope of moving in before Dday. Thinking of maybe renting somewhere else temporarily. Is that crazy? Or should we just go with the in-laws, and be done with it? They're just further out of town (would require more planning for getting to the hospital) and the bed is quite soft and smaller than ours and I already have problems sleeping in a double with all my pillows and support!

Most of the things are probably fairly small usual pre-contract enquiries. I'm a solicitor and that;'s the case most of the time. When are you due?

Gatica

I've only 6 more weeks to go! and we've to move out mid-October, so we're cutting it close. It was a silly jump in the dark that we didn't think through and things kind of progressed from there.

Yes, they are standard pre-contract enquiries but some of these, which according to our solicitor could/should've been cleared couple of weeks ago, are still outstanding from the sellers, such as old mortgages being cleared on the folio, confirmations of NPPR, rights of way from the council and planning permission on extensions. Supposedly everything being in order and a matter of getting papers to prove it, unless of course we've been misinformed and sellers are waiting for any of these to be done first - in which case who knows how much longer.

Beanybabog

Gatica wrote: »

I've only 6 more weeks to go! and we've to move out mid-October, so we're cutting it close. It was a silly jump in the dark that we didn't think through and things kind of progressed from there.

Yes, they are standard pre-contract enquiries but some of these, which according to our solicitor could/should've been cleared couple of weeks ago, are still outstanding from the sellers, such as old mortgages being cleared on the folio, confirmations of NPPR, rights of way from the council and planning permission on extensions. Supposedly everything being in order and a matter of getting papers to prove it, unless of course we've been misinformed and sellers are waiting for any of these to be done first - in which case who knows how much longer.

That sucks. Just keep pressurizing them. They all sound like quick fixes but I hope they get the finger out for you. That said, it's totally possible to close it in 2 weeks from where you're at. Hope it works out!! I bought a house when I was circa
21 weeks pregnant and never again!! The new house was grand- it was cleaning the old flat That was. A nightmare. Hire someone to do it it's not worth it

Gatica

yeah, we'd been recommended to do that for both houses, plus we've a lot of eager family luckily. I think my problem will be me! I'm a perfectionist