Small bit of advice needed

LegacyUser

Im a male in early 30ties. Ive always been quite and shy, particularly in groups, didn't get off to a very good start from a social perspective, my parents believed education and collecting money was all that was important. fortunately in my case both of these have been easy socializing 100times move different......people even have remarked on it jokingly, I guess I have noticed it myself too, apparently I was doing everything right 15years ago study stdy study, work work work, save money save money save money when I shoudl have been partying and enjoying myself. I look back in shame TBH

Dont have many friends either as you may guess, as Im not funny and overly chatty.

anyway have often gone to the pub with a close friend and a few others and we go on further afield and well Im lost when we get to a late bar/nightclub. Ive had a few drinks yes but never drunk, the drink doesn't oil me up.

All I can do when I get to a late bar/nightclub is sit/stand quitely on my own and try and interject a small bit into other peoples conversations. I often feel in the way and Ive a feeling lots would rather if I wasn't there.

Im no good at talking to strangers I don't have a lot to say.

Long story short I often come away early as I see others laughing and joking and me standing there like an spare wheel.

Coming away early isn't doing me any good, I don't think, I guess Im looking for advice on a copying strategy to deal with the feelings of uselessness that lead to me going away early

any advice

intheclouds

coping wrote: »

Im no good at talking to strangers I don't have a lot to say.

You can learn how to be a better conversationalist but one tip for you that wont take you too far out of your comfort zone is this:

Ask people about themselves. Ask them what they do for a living, what they do for fun, what hobbies they have. As soon as they mention something that sounds remotely interesting, ask them more about it.

Most people like talking about themselves, and you dont even have to do a lot of talking this way, because you can ask stuff then let them chat away.

Ryan Mac Sweeney

Hi there
I have read your post. I am sorry to hear that. Yes I know its terrible for you. My advice to you is that maybe when you go out especially when you go clubbing maybe go over and talk to other people ask them questions such as what do you do for a living? What are your hobbies? What kind of music do you like? and so on. Also maybe start on building your confidence and another way of meeting new people is maybe see if there are any meet ups in your area and join them.
best of luck