No Frills

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We didn't want to do the typical wedding, but felt after over a decade together, it was time we got married. Neither of us buy in to the traditional side of it, but for legal and taxation purposes, it seems the pragmatic move. So after a fifteen-minute chat in the Registry Office on Tuesday we have our registration ready to sign.

We're having just the two witnesses (and solmeniser) at the signing and we'll have a party at a later stage when we're financially able and have the time to organise having all our friends and family over. You need to do the signing in a HSE-registered venue and we wanted to do it on a Sunday so I phoned around to find the cheapest option for our purposes. By far the most amazing offer was FREE use of a room at one particular hotel. I phoned around other places and I was quoted E350 just for half an hour in the library of one Cork establishment!

I just thought I'd mention. The ceremony is going to cost E650: E200 fee for the registry office and E450 for a Humanist solmeniser. If anyone else has an interest in tying the knot in a very low-key manner, I'd be more than happy to share my experiences. As for those who fundamentally disagree with our frugality; I've heard every reason I'm doing it wrong, it's happening, it's outside of your control.

ChampagnePop

What did you have to book with the hotel to get a free room for the ceremony?

What kind of party are you having for your guests?

Addle

Why have a party at all?

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Addle wrote:

Why have a party at all?

So that we can tell our friends and family that we've gotten married, because that's generally a thing people like to know about a person they're close to.

ChampagnePop wrote:

What did you have to book with the hotel to get a free room for the ceremony?

I just told the organiser what we were planning (only the two guests, no reception), she was very open to the idea and then she said that seeing as they wouldn't have to set anything up, it wouldn't incur a charge. Such a fantastic gesture. We'll be getting food at the hotel restaurant afterwards.

ChampagnePop wrote:

What kind of party are you having for your guests?

We're just going to have around 50 of our closest friends and family over for a celebratory announcement. I reckon people will find it refreshing to just be able to enjoy the day without realising in advance it's a wedding. We don't want gifts or tuxedos or any of that pomp. There won't be a signing or a religious experience or any of the bureaucratic aspect of marriage because it'll all have been done already.

Our best friend, who is a fabulous chef, has created a unique menu for the occasion. I'm a musician myself and a lot of my friends play music so I might try and organise for them to be able to jump up and play a song during the evening.

Basically I hope it'll just be a house full of great food, nice music and lots and lots of terrific booze for everyone so that we can announce that we're contractually oblige to stay together forever, hip hooray for us!

morgana

We are getting married after a few decades together - as we finally can . Also will be a small affair (around 30 or so), ceremony in the registry office with a rest of the day (& night) party afterwards at the house. Everybody seems to be thrilled to have an informal party rather than the usual formal hotel reception.

Still, even though its an informal affair, some things popped up we didn't even think about, lol. We went like, oh rings, totally forgot about that when we discussed the ceremony with the lovely registrar. :P

The wedding is our day to celebrate our relationship, so we do what we want to do!

lazygal

You don't need rings! We didn't have any at our legal ceremony.

05eaftqbrs9jlh

Yeah, I read somewhere you're supposed to spend four months' salary on a ring!!! Presumably so that after you're divorced, they can live for four months without you supporting them? :P

Anyway - that seems like crazy money to be spending. We're going on a holiday driving around the lakes of Italy which will probably come to about a month's salary between us so instead of cherishing a piece of metal with a stone in it, we'll cherish the memory of that for a lot less money!

lazygal

Well I wouldn't be that cynical-I got a lovely engagement ring and wedding band for our humanist ceremony, he got a cheap one I bought online but equally I know people who had much more expensive jewellery and aren't divorced yet.

We got engaged in Italy-I love the memories and my beautiful sapphire engagement ring!

ChampagnePop

Good luck OP, your celebration party sounds lovely! I wanted to do that myself but there's two of us getting married, and he wanted something more formal, so we're doing something in the middle!
You're very lucky to have such talented friends to help with the catering and entertainment - that must help with the budget!

LirW

We are doing it in a quite informal way too. With roughly 40 guests, half of them flying in (my relatives). We'll have a humanist ceremony in a farm-like venue in the middle of nowhere (although it costs us a bit) but we are making a chill weekend out of it because we have around 20 people travelling.
No dresscode at all. I did find my dress online, it's so plain and simple for roughly 33$ since I don't like the bling and princess robes etc. A lot is going to be DIY because we both enjoy doing it.
I don't have an engagement ring (he proposed with a token ring, I'm cool with that) and we don't know if there will be any rings or so involved yet.

Your plan speaks to me a lot and I wish you the very best!

dar100

Just myself, herself, two kids and two witnesses. No party or rings!! Will be getting a tattoo on my ring finger!!