Relationships in general

LegacyUser

Okay so I've never told anyone the following and this is the first time I've ever written it out ...

Basically I am in my 30's never been in a relationship or had proper sex with someone as in I've kissed etc

It's not because I didn't want too because I always have, it was due to insecurities and self hate, I really believed for a long time it should just happen and because it didn't I had to incredibly ugly. I always thought they'd be just getting with me as a joke or if it was on a night out that they were drunk and would be mortified to be with me! Back then I also cared what the people I hung around with thought instead of just dating someone I liked.

So I took a few years to concentrate on myself and become happy with who I am. I now have the confidence and actually happy with myself.

The only thing is relationships! How do I tell someone this as won't they find it weird? Am I weird because of this, should I have still have had relationships?
How far into dating do I say any of this to a guy? Sometimes the self doubt comes back and I overthink like people always know I'm single, I never get asked are you seeing someone, is it obvious when people are single? I'm not desperate or anything, if I like a guy I'll chat away, I'd say I wouldn't be very forward but I'd still make the first move!

Sorry for a long post! Thanks to anyone that has read it!!

dellas1979

I'll tell you something for nothing OP.

If a guy is right for you, he wont give a flying banana.

If a guy reacts to whats happened in your life in any negative way, he is not the person for you.

And it really is that simple.

I think its fantastic you are able to put yourself out there. Brave. And you should be proud of yourself. Shows confidence in yourself.

LegacyUser

As a guy here I second the above. If a guy likes you he won't give a flying banana.

Guys don't really mind if a girl hasn't been in a relationship. Yes they may think there might be something hidden that they don't see but guys don't usually dig too deep.

Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

Mr. Incognito

I dont think at any age that what has happened or not happened in your dating life is relevant to any partner.

I think the easiest thing to do to get comfortable with dating is simply dating.

Like anything else it take practice to be comfortable with.

Best of luck with it. Dating is great fun.

Lavinia

Well it is great that you are in a good place to "break the ice".
Perhaps be prepared that first relationships may not be "till death tear us apart" but would/could be a step to possibly one that will be like that - if that is what you are looking for.
Please be aware that being in your 30s is still quite young - from my point of view.
I wish you all the best : )

FizzleSticks

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