Skillz

Witchie

Ok so what do you do well?

I have arrived home drunk as fook but I still sm able to make amazing home made chips. My dad ran a chipper when I was a kid and can make the best chips ever and I learned from him. Drunk or sober.....I make amazing chips.

So what can you do that is pretty fly....for a white guy/woman

whiskeyman

Sleep!

That's where I'm a Viking!

maudgonner

I'm excellent at hill starts. No rolling back for me, no siree!

Can't reverse or parallel park worth a damn mind.

Smidge

Make sure the chip pan is off

harry Bailey esq

I can lick my elbow

kowloon

I can make a very high pitched squeaking noise. Can do fcuk all else, but I can mimic an oystercatcher.

maudgonner

harry Bailey esq wrote: »

I can lick my elbow

Long tongue or wonky arm?

'Cause if it's the former....how you doin'? :pac:

riffmongous

I can take harmless comments and make them out to be offensive

MEGA BRO WOLF 5000

Don't burn the house down.

riffmongous

Witchie wrote: »

Ok so what do you do well?

I have arrived home drunk as fook but I still sm able to make amazing home made chips. My dad ran a chipper when I was a kid and can make the best chips ever and I learned from him. Drunk or sober.....I make amazing chips.

So what can you do that is pretty fly....for a white guy/woman

Wow racist and transphobic, stay classy AH :rolleyes:

maudgonner

Witchie wrote: »

I make amazing chips.

BTW, mind would you share the secret to perfect chips with us anyway Witchie!

Smidge

riffmongous wrote: »

Wow racist and transphobic, stay classy AH :rolleyes:

Just in case you were serious....:D

Junkyard Tom

Are they frozen chips from a bag you bought in a shop?

the evasion_kid

I can do the boogaloo..

One eyed Jack

riffmongous wrote: »

Wow racist and transphobic, stay classy AH :rolleyes:

I was going to say I can spot a punch line a mile away, but even I didn't see that coming! :pac:

Ruu

Can do a good few tricks in Skitchin'.

KKkitty

Be a mind full of useless information. I'm great for pub quizzes not so much for life.

Witchie

Junkyard Tom wrote: »

Are they frozen chips from a bag you bought in a shop?

Don't be silly! I peeled the spuds, chopped them perfectly and fried them to golden deliciousment.

Smidge wrote: »

Just in case you were serious....:D

Was singing this while making chips, hence the wording of my op. Give it to me baby ah ah ah.

recylingbin

I have the skills to know that when landing hone baloobas, the toaster is the most dangerous device that I'd use. Anything that has the potential to burn the house to the ground is off limits.

Menas

When drunk I can sniff out a chip shop from 2000 yards. Would not be tackling a chip pan!

Happy hangover Witchie!

TG1

I can decode the instructions on flatpack furniture. I am an Ikea ninja!

jimmii

I can build ikea flat pack without instructions. I am a real ikea ninja.

GLaDOS

I'm incredibly good at staring contests

ToddyDoody

I'm good at posting on message boards.... like this one.

jimmii

ToddyDoody wrote: »

I'm good at posting on message boards.... like this one.

I disagree.

I am good at disagreeing.

nullzero

Witchie wrote: »

Ok so what do you do well?

I have arrived home drunk as fook but I still sm able to make amazing home made chips. My dad ran a chipper when I was a kid and can make the best chips ever and I learned from him. Drunk or sober.....I make amazing chips.

So what can you do that is pretty fly....for a white guy/woman

Home from the pub drunk making chips.
Sounds like the set up for those 90's UTV "Chip pon fire" ads.

osarusan

I have an incredible ability to make people angry with me.

harry Bailey esq

maudgonner wrote: »

Long tongue or wonky arm?

'Cause if it's the former....how you doin'? :pac:

My arms are pretty standard as arms go......

harry Bailey esq

jimmii wrote: »

I disagree.

I am good at disagreeing.

No your not!

Witchie

Can someone bring me a gallon of 7up please.

harry Bailey esq

Witchie wrote: »

Can someone bring me a gallon of 7up please.

We use the metric system here

jimmii

harry Bailey esq wrote: »

No your not!

I disagree with your your.

harry Bailey esq

jimmii wrote: »

I disagree with your your.

I concur

Witchie

harry Bailey esq wrote: »

We use the metric system here

Ok then bring me metrics instead.

Witchie

maudgonner wrote: »

BTW, mind would you share the secret to perfect chips with us anyway Witchie!

The key is to rinse them well after chopping, dry in a salad spinner or a clean tea towel. Have oil at it's hottest then cook until they are almost cooked. Take them out, let the oil heat up again to maximumtemp again and put chips back in til golden brown.

They will be crispy on outside and fluffy heaven inside.

frozenfrozen

Witchie wrote: »

The key is to rinse them well after chopping, dry in a salad spinner or a clean tea towel. Have oil at it's hottest then cook until they are almost cooked. Take them out, let the oil heat up again to maximumtemp again and put chips back in til golden brown.

They will be crispy on outside and fluffy heaven inside.

you can't forget the drying at the end. if you leave them sit for two seconds without shaking the oil off you're done. put them into a mountain of kitchen paper and then salt them. we should go into business. because your dad owned a chipper we can call you chip off the old block and get you a michelin star

AndyBoBandy

Witchie wrote: »

Ok so what do you do well?

I have arrived home drunk as fook but I still sm able to make amazing home made chips. My dad ran a chipper when I was a kid and can make the best chips ever and I learned from him. Drunk or sober.....I make amazing chips.

So what can you do that is pretty fly....for a white guy/woman

Forget about what I can do, what's the secret to awesome chips?

Edit: I see now!!

I shall be trying your method soon.

So fry til almost done, then leave them (for how long?)

Witchie

frozenfrozen wrote: »

you can't forget the drying at the end. if you leave them sit for two seconds without shaking the oil off you're done. put them into a mountain of kitchen paper and then salt them. we should go into business. because your dad owned a chipper we can call you chip off the old block and get you a michelin star

You are right. Have to put them in a bowl on kitchen roll and toss them gently to remove excess oil. I also forgot that when we do the precook we sprinkle a little salt on them then so the salt kinda cooks into them when you return them to the fryer.

Love the name btw. Am a right chip off him and all. He used to own a chipper called the cut spud.

ptyloch

Witchie wrote: »

Ok so what do you do well?

I have arrived home drunk as fook but I still sm able to make amazing home made chips. My dad ran a chipper when I was a kid and can make the best chips ever and I learned from him. Drunk or sober.....I make amazing chips.

So what can you do that is pretty fly....for a white guy/woman

This reminds me when a mate of mine got drunk on good friday, returned home in the middle of the night and had a craving for chips. He had no deep fat fryer so filled the pan with oil and put it on, decide to go to his bedroom and put on a movie while waiting.

He was woken up by his father, the apartment filled with smoke, fire brigade on the way, whole kitchen destroyed, everything that his mom prepped for Easter was fit for the bin.

Myself and a few fellas spent the Saturday, Easter Sunday and Monday painting the whole place...... Ahh the good old times