No friends to name as godparent for baptism

LegacyUser

I'm a father of three. My son is starting school in September this year and hopefully his two sisters will as well.
Here is the problem, the school is a Catholic school and only my eldest (starting in September) is baptised.
His sisters are not because I've no friends apart from my wife.

My brother was the godfather for my son's baptism, but that's it, I'm out of godfathers.
I am quite introverted in character, hence the anon post, I am married and love my wife to bits and am very happy with my life as it is. But what am I going to do about my daughters getting in to the same school?

I have no friends apart from my wife, to be honest I don't want or need any more than that truth be told, but if that's going to hold back my daughters I really don't know what to do.

Will the Catholic church baptise kids without a godparent?, can a school in modern Ireland enrol based on baptism or not these days?
I'm not a bad person, just a very shy one, I love my family to bits and really don't want my shyness to hold them back.
Can i baptise my daughters without a godfather somehow without feeling like a shameful father?

Neyite

I'm pretty sure that you can baptise without godparents. And anyone can be a godparent - I know people who were godparent to their grandchildren, or children with only godmothers or only godfathers.

Best talk to your priest.

LegacyUser

My grandparents were also my godparents so that's something to keep in mind. These are the downsides of being an introvert, I am one too so I get it! But don't think of yourself as shameful or anything like that, you have your own little unit that you are happy with and with a bit of thought you'll find a solution to the baptism too. The official wording is that you should have godparents insofar as possible, so it's not totally cut and dry. I would check it out with your priest if I was you. What about your wife family and friends, does she have people she could ask? Have ye spoken about your worries? Oh and another thing is that a lot of schools also prioritise on the basis of having a sibling enrolled, so thats another thing to consider.

pc7

With the sibling policy would they not get in regardless? my grandad is my godfather could you do that? Has your wife any friends or family she can ask.

RhubarbCrumble

Your brother can be godfather to the other children too. My partner is godfather to 3 of his brother's 4 kids, as like yourself his brother is a quiet introverted man. Is your/your wife's father in the picture, or does your wife have any brothers? Maybe you could ask one of them too?

triona1

You and your wife can be godparents,I'd my son give me away on my wedding day he's 20 now but was just 11 at the time,wasn't a dry eye in the church him walking me down the aisle.he apologises now for giving me away.😂but I'm also godparent to 3 of my sister's kids.

Toots

You could always ask your brother to stand again. Myself and one of my sisters have the same godfather - my dad's brother.

Detached Retina

Ditto..I'm an antisocial hermit if I can get away with it. Now I'm looking at getting my 2 and 4 yr old baptised,literally to get them into the school me, my siblings and cousins all went to! My daughter didn't get a place this sept (tbh it's ok, her speech isn't great and needs 2nd round of therapy-extra year will be good for her). None of her friends got in either based on months. A head Teacher said despite the "1. catholics in the parish, 2.catholics outside parish 3.Everyone else, on their school website, they really just go by age for volume of applications fairness. She missed by a month..My siblings like me are agnostic/athiest and my estranged husband and his family are muslims (though he's non practising and just said ok if its for school,baptise and just get them to visit a madrass when theyr'e older for balance and see what they think. What do you do for god parents like op said? Work colleagues I was thinking, you're usually friendly with them?

Noo

My cousin is godmother to her little brother, im not saying to make your son godfather to his sisters (im not sure if theres an age limit but my guessing he'd have to be aware of what he is signing up for). She was 14 at the time, my brother also became at godfather at 12. Basically saying is looking younger an option?....do you or your wife have nephews, cousins, family friends with teenagers or preteens?

triona1

I'm nearly positive that a child to act as a God parent has to have made their communion.

CaraMay

I think it's awful that people are baptising their kids falsely. Op you seem to want yo genuinely baptise your kids do why not use people on your wife's side

Keane2baMused

triona1 wrote: »

I'm nearly positive that a child to act as a God parent has to have made their communion.

It's the confirmation they need to have made

Keane2baMused

CaraMay wrote: »

I think it's awful that people are baptising their kids falsely. Op you seem to want yo genuinely baptise your kids do why not use people on your wife's side

Unfortunately it's that or they can't get their children into a school. Educate together schools are few and far between.

jaykay74

CaraMay wrote:

I think it's awful that people are baptising their kids falsely. Op you seem to want yo genuinely baptise your kids do why not use people on your wife's side

Probably more shameful that people have to in order to have educational choices. Best option is family members I guess even if it's some repetition involved.

The Raptor

Keane2baMused wrote: »

It's the confirmation they need to have made

I don't think this is right. My older brother stood for my younger brother. The older brother didn't have his confirmation at the time. Unless the rules changed in the past 20 years.

Katgurl

Ah no shame in not having friends, it sounds like you have a loverly happy home. You could ask your brother again or your dad if he's alive or a cousin. Does your wife have a brother or close male cousin?

looksee

I think it is up to the priest. My eldest's godmother is her protestant aunt. My youngest I would like to have had her brother stand for her, but at 15 he was declared too young - that was nearly 30 years ago.

retro:electro

CaraMay wrote: »

I think it's awful that people are baptising their kids falsely. Op you seem to want yo genuinely baptise your kids do why not use people on your wife's side

Ya it's awful that people feel the only option they have is baptise their child in order to get them into a STATE funded school. This is what the system has created, and it's a win win for them. Either way children are getting baptised, why would they change it.

Anyway op you could stand for you child or ask your brother again.

Keane2baMused

The Raptor wrote: »

I don't think this is right. My older brother stood for my younger brother. The older brother didn't have his confirmation at the time. Unless the rules changed in the past 20 years.

I stood for my younger sibling and the priest said we had to have made our confirmation at the time. That was nearly 18 years ago

Cunning Stunt

Sorry for jumping in here but would I have to get my two kids baprised as catholics in order to secure a school place for them? They were both christened here in denmark, which is not a catholic church , but we are moving back home to ireland. Seems mad that religion still dictates in ireland with regards to schools! I thought that was done away with!

meeeeh

It depends where are you moving to. As far as I know problem is in oversubscribed schools mostly in Dublin.

My brother's and mine godparents are our grandparents.

MamaBee92

Dad_no_friends wrote: »

I'm a father of three. My son is starting school in September this year and hopefully his two sisters will as well.
Here is the problem, the school is a Catholic school and only my eldest (starting in September) is baptised.
His sisters are not because I've no friends apart from my wife.

My brother was the godfather for my son's baptism, but that's it, I'm out of godfathers.
I am quite introverted in character, hence the anon post, I am married and love my wife to bits and am very happy with my life as it is. But what am I going to do about my daughters getting in to the same school?

I have no friends apart from my wife, to be honest I don't want or need any more than that truth be told, but if that's going to hold back my daughters I really don't know what to do.

Will the Catholic church baptise kids without a godparent?, can a school in modern Ireland enrol based on baptism or not these days?
I'm not a bad person, just a very shy one, I love my family to bits and really don't want my shyness to hold them back.
Can i baptise my daughters without a godfather somehow without feeling like a shameful father?

My daughter was accepted into a Catholic school without being baptised, they can't refuse you based on religion. They may give preference to Catholics but they will find it difficult to give a valid reason not to accept your daughter's especially since they have an older brother in the school. However, if you really want to get your children baptised it is becoming very common to have 2 godmothers or 2 godfathers instead of the traditional godmother and godfather.

MamaBee92

Cunning Stunt wrote: »

Sorry for jumping in here but would I have to get my two kids baprised as catholics in order to secure a school place for them? They were both christened here in denmark, which is not a catholic church , but we are moving back home to ireland. Seems mad that religion still dictates in ireland with regards to schools! I thought that was done away with!

It is absolutely not allowed to refuse education based on religion regardless of the school's denomination.

Keane2baMused

MamaBee92 wrote: »

It is absolutely not allowed to refuse education based on religion regardless of the school's denomination.

As it stands they can give priority to those who are Roman Catholic, thereby inderectly refusing those of no faith or other.