Boring Life/Turning to drink

LegacyUser

I am a man my late 30s and I am living a very lonely and boring existence , so much so that its led me to hit the bottle hard

All I do is work during the week and when I am off I absolutely nothing to do except, surf the net, play video games or watch TV. Drinking wine on my own at home every night has become a comfort for me

All my friends have settled down and have moved on with their life's and I just feel so isolated

Would appreciate some advice

AvyStreet

Does anything in life inspire you ?

You could start off with reading a biography of someone you look up to, how they achieved their success. Take pointers from them and then use their thinking to improve your life.

Buona Fortuna

I think that you have slipped into the obvious trap for someone in your position. I sympathise because I think in similar circumstances I could slip into the same trap.

I think you need to find some activities to do during the week and at weekends. I'm guessing that sport is not your first love - personally I hate it.

So here goes, how about an evening class in: woodwork, wood-turning, pottery, or photography?

How about joining a hill-walking/ walking/ cycling group for the weekend.

Jay Pentatonic

I agree with the above posts, reading and evening courses can be a great way to get out of rut.
What about volunteering? Could also be a way to get out and about and start mixing with new people.

LegacyUser

I actually work shift so I'm not off every weekend, 4 on(2 days 2 nights 12 hrs each day/night) 4 off, I def need to do something

Ryan Mac Sweeney

Hi
I have read your post. I am sorry to hear that. My advice in your situation would be to 1 do an evening course your local secondary school would be a great help in this or maybe do voulnterring e.g meals on wheels would be a great thing as it would give you something to do and you will be able to get out of the house for a few hours and get to meet people. Also with your drinking problem you should go and see your GP about it and discuss it through with him or her and ask for a referral to councilling.

Whitewinged

I agree with the other posters op. You are not getting any joy from surfing the internet or watching tv etc so maybe reducing this and taking part in less passive activities with more value and purpose for you would help. I know its so easy to get stuck in a rut and it's hard but maybe just try to put yourself out there and take up a new hobby, something that you think that you would enjoy and possibly meet some fun or interesting new people. And also maybe talk to your gp, not only about the drinking but also about being bored.

the evasion_kid

dont do it man,when you cross the line from drinking more into dependency into alcoholism its a total different ballgame and a nasty one,usually the 30-35 mark is when it gets most people.knock the drink on the head,cut down on the internet and youll find yourself naturally getting out of the house to do other things

Optimalprimerib

ophere201621:41 wrote: »

I actually work shift so I'm not off every weekend, 4 on(2 days 2 nights 12 hrs each day/night) 4 off, I def need to do something

When I was doing shift work like that, I found it very difficult too. I would look into doing a course of what interests you career wise or not, to meet new people and expand your horizons.

The problem with shift work (esp. night work) is that when you are free, no one else is and working 12 hour shifts mean it's work-eat-sleep X 4.

...__...

Hi op
God I could have sworn I wrote this I'm in the same boat. Midweek is fine but the weekends are where it really gets to me.
Tried reading books no attention span for it. There isn't many classes on a Saturday night to keep you entertained so what I ended up doing was either engrossing in documentaries or there is a website called Allison where you can do online courses. Its free and worthwhile.

Johngoose

I think you can break this cycle and eventually you won't need the drink.Just STOP drinking straight away and you can overcome this.The drink has just been blotting out the real problem.You are unhappy for a reason and you need to address that reason.You need interaction in the evenings off/weekends. Others here have mentioned good social outlets.

kerryjack

Its a 20thcentury problem people don't talk to each other was in an nct centre the other evening 5 people in there all stuck in there smart phones not a word spoken its sad in away if you start talking to someone not they think there is something wrong with you, for yourself you could get a dog it will get you out and about and a nice dog will always get you noticed, get a bike great placees to cycle in this country you could do the ring of kerry its beutiful on a bike don't wast your life and your money on drink I wasted 10 years in my 20s drinking but copped myself on when I hit 30 I didn't have a pot to piss in but since than I have travelled alot got married bought a house and four kids later I look forward to a bit of quite time

Jay Pentatonic

...__... wrote: »

Hi op
God I could have sworn I wrote this I'm in the same boat. Midweek is fine but the weekends are where it really gets to me.
Tried reading books no attention span for it. There isn't many classes on a Saturday night to keep you entertained so what I ended up doing was either engrossing in documentaries or there is a website called Allison where you can do online courses. Its free and worthwhile.

Wow, just had a quick look at that Alison website, looks pretty damn impressive. Might be well worth a look OP

via4

For something different to do to get out of the house for a bit I did a meditation class it goes on for an hour and a half and there was mostly men there. All different ages and walks of life as well so it was nice to mix with older people for a change. Also I know I say this bit of advice all the time on boards but there is nothing like a massage treat yourself you deserve it I was also trying to check out walking groups in my area maybe that could be something as well ipthese things are like trial and error but us lonely creatures we will push on through and find something