Younger brothers doing my head in

Hollister11

My two younger brothers aged 15 and 16 are doing my head in recently. I'm 20 btw

They don't respect me or listen to me at all. They use my stuff such as deodorant, toothpaste etc without even asking. I buy all my own toiletries, by choice my parents still buy there's. When I say but your own to them they say "nah I don't want to waste my money" but it's ok to use mine.

They also never clean up. The three of us share a bathroom' and they always leave there clothes I'm there. It could build up for days. They also leave all there dishes outside three bedrooms. If I'm cleaning the kitchen and they bring stuff down, whenever I ask them to put there stuff I'm the dishwasher say say no I don't want too. They never offer to help around the house and spend all there free time watching to shows.

When ever I freak at them they call me a bitch or a woman. Am I a bitch because I want a clean house and the two of use are dirty ****ers. I even invite them to 5 a side with my mates on Fridays and they still treat me like ****, unless they need help with there computers.

Amy advice on what to do.

Ursus Horribilis

Where are your parents in all of this? They sound like a nightmare but it's up to your parents to pull them up on their behaviour. They way you're describing this, it almost comes across like you and your brothers living in an autonomous flat in your parent's house. All I can suggest to you is to lock your toiletries away in a drawer somewhere so they can't get to them. The other problems re. them leaving the bathroom like a tip and them bringing their dishes to their rooms -those are issues your parents should be dealing with. Why aren't they, by the way? Have you spoken to them?

There's no point in you freaking out to them. There are two of them and only two of you. You're outnumbered and they're going to mock you. As for the 5 a side etc., stop inviting them. They don't respect you so it's time to pull back a bit and try not to get so emotionally involved.

You're 20 years of age so I assume you're either working or going to college. In a year or two you could find yourself moving out of home and away from them anyway. In the meantime, talk to your parents. It's their duty to do the parenting, not you.

Dee01

Hi op,

I'm sorry you're so frustrated. I know what siblings are like!!

They sound like typical teenagers and siblings to me.... There's not a lot of advice to give here really. As you are 20, maybe it's time to move out? You might enjoy your own space.

If that's not an option, keep your stuff hidden and remember they are your brothers and they look up to you. In a couple of years this will all br in the past and you will hopefully be great friends.

celligraphy

Oh God if this was me I would be really angry and do such immature stuff , such as put toothpaste down toilet , change WiFi code , or hide their clothes that they leave on the ground ... Replace toothpaste with chilli paste ... But that's just me maybe few rotten tricks might help change their attitude but otherwise tell your parents

Ursus Horribilis

celligraphy wrote: »

Oh God if this was me I would be really angry and do such immature stuff , such as put toothpaste down toilet, change WiFi code , or hide their clothes that they leave on the ground ... Replace toothpaste with chilli paste ... But that's just me maybe few rotten tricks might help change their attitude but otherwise tell your parents

I can understand the temptation but from the sounds of things, it'd just up the ante and lead to worse things happen to him. Our OP has a pair of bratty teenage brothers on his hand. Really, you would be better off not letting them see that their behaviour is getting to you. Try to adopt a persona of "I don't give a sh*t". Keep your own room tidy and don't get involved in what they're up to. As I said before, that's your parent's job.
Leave their clothes pile up in the bathoom. Let their plates gather in their rooms. Don't bother cleaning up after them around the house. If it's squalor they want to live in, then let them live in squalor.

I meant to add that if they come looking for help with their computers, take your time before you get to them. This might be the only aspect of your life where they're on the back foot. It's an opportunity to screw them in a minor way. Tell them you'll get to look at their computers when you're ready. Don't inconvenience them if you want to look at their computers. Finish what you're doing first, then go look. A "can't be arsed" persona can work wonders in a situation like this.

The biggest problem here is that you're 20 and a young adult. They're still immature teenage lads who are closer in age. Really, there's a gulf between you. Hopefully when they get older, the obnoxiousness will go and they'll turn into pleasant human beings.

freshpopcorn

OP, I remember seeing your name on here over various issues with your family and friends over the years.
My best advice for you now is for you to get a toiletries bag and put your stuff in it and don't help them out.
I think you still living at home so I think you should try and find a student house share but be careful where you choose because young guys are can be very messy and you mightn't be happy either. (Sorry if that last bit sounds mean, but you could end up in a house share with a bunch of lads who'd be even messier than your brothers and you'd be outnumbered) you working/getting a grant?

Rubberchikken

that age are a pain! could you talk to your parents. i'm guessing you have enough to do and don't need to be teaching your younger siblings to behave.
they';re at an age when chancing their arm is a guarantee.
i know it's hard but try not to react to too much they do. if you can ignore the little things it might help.

they do come to you when they need help i.e. computer bacause they know you will help. all the other stuff is immaturity and they will, in time, grow out oif it. take care

Rubberchikken

that age are a pain! could you talk to your parents. i'm guessing you have enough to do and don't need to be teaching your younger siblings to behave.
they';re at an age when chancing their arm is a guarantee.
i know it's hard but try not to react to too much they do. if you can ignore the little things it might help.

they do come to you when they need help i.e. computer bacause they know you will help. all the other stuff is immaturity and they will, in time, grow out oif it. take care

Ryan Mac Sweeney

Hi
I am sorry to hear what youre going through. Yes I know they can be a bit of a pain at that age. I have two teenage siblings btw so I know exactly what you mean. You should talk to your parents about them an explain to them how you feel. Explain to them that they need to start doing things themselves. They are 15 & 16 for gods sake not 10. In relation to them using your tolietries you should buy your own toliet bag. Discount stores such as Dealz have really good ones for €1.49. Then lock them away and if they ask to use them say no and tell them to go and buy their own. Tell them to bring down their own dishes and to tidy their rooms themselves and that you are not their servant and they should be doing things themselves. You should not have to do everything at all for them and if they dont listen to you tell your parents to have a talk with them.