Surprise wedding- Y or N?

Legofriend

Myself and oh are together a long time(more than 10 years). We want to get married but don't want a weddingy wedding iykwim. I have a milestone birthday next year and have started toying with the idea of inviting everyone to my party and in the middle of it , having a surprise ceremony.
One downside is possibly not having much of oh friends/family there, given that it would be " my" party.
Looking for suggestions on how we might get around that one?
Also, do you think it would be a good idea in the first place?

unclebill98

I had one.

Invited people to a engagement party and when they arrived I handed them a mass booklet and told them to head to a church down the road. Was great fun. We invited who we wanted and they all turned up.

unclebill98

I had one.

Invited people to a engagement party and when they arrived I handed them a mass booklet and told them to head to a church down the road. Was great fun. We invited who we wanted and they all turned up.

Addle

I think it's a brilliant idea.

After 10 years together, it wouldn't be so strange for your husband to invite his friends a family to a party he's organising?

Legofriend

Thanks for the replies folks.
The thing is, he wouldn't be organising the party. ..I would. His workmates/club mates wouldn't necessarily be on "my" guestlist. I'd know most of them but they would be a bit odd for them to go to m birthday party.

I like the idea of guests not having the pressure of dressing up for a wedding and presents. Just a normal Saturday night dolled up for a catch up and bit of dancing.

Addle

As a solution, why can't he just pretend he's organising it?
Unless it's going to be a surprise for him too?! ��

Addle

As a solution, why can't he just pretend he's organising it?
Unless it's going to be a surprise for him too?! 😉

Addle

Or you could just have close friends and family as guests.

sillysmiles

When were you thinking of doing it? Is there any reason why you can't just arrange everything and then invite people close to the date?
Personally I have family abroad and I wouldn't invite or expect them to attend a birthday (even a big birthday) but I know they would be gutted to miss a wedding. For me, I don't place much weight on something like a birthday party (birthdays aren't a big deal to me) and I think that people may miss out on it.

A wedding is as weddingy as you make it.

sillysmiles

When were you thinking of doing it? Is there any reason why you can't just arrange everything and then invite people close to the date?
Personally I have family abroad and I wouldn't invite or expect them to attend a birthday (even a big birthday) but I know they would be gutted to miss a wedding. For me, I don't place much weight on something like a birthday party (birthdays aren't a big deal to me) and I think that people may miss out on it.

A wedding is as weddingy as you make it.

SecretBride

We have just done exactly that! Had a secret quick wedding in a registry office a few weeks ago and in the meantime invited everyone to a surprise engagement party that my sister and friend said they were organizing for us....when everyone showed up, we got there 15 mins later, they all shouted surprise and we played along for a few mins.....then we turned the tables on them and announced that they were actually at our wedding and to give us half hour to get changed and sorted and we had a humanist wedding there. We loved it, it was stress free and the buzz about the place was electric! Every single person thought it was the best wedding ever! Go for it!!!

Milly33

I would be all up for a surprise wedding... Great idea so it is, even to have just to have it the way ye want to have it.. I know people mean the best with helping etc but sometimes lines get overstepped and things ye want get lost..

Would his family as such not be invited to your party then or are ye not close that way..
There are so many ways to do it, suppose it comes down to ye..

Like if you were thinking of using your birthday as the key, then you depending what ye would like to do, ye could just invite everyone including his friends and say that ye wanted to do something for your birthday but also said that ye would like to have a big get together with everyone..

It all depends really are ye planning on going to the reg office that day or having it all in the one venue. If ye pick what ye would like and then work from there it might be easier to plan..

I know one lady who said she was having a christenting and invited all and ended up well after the christening they got married too and surprised everyone.. endless ways to go about it

Milly33

I would be all up for a surprise wedding... Great idea so it is, even to have just to have it the way ye want to have it.. I know people mean the best with helping etc but sometimes lines get overstepped and things ye want get lost..

Would his family as such not be invited to your party then or are ye not close that way..
There are so many ways to do it, suppose it comes down to ye..

Like if you were thinking of using your birthday as the key, then you depending what ye would like to do, ye could just invite everyone including his friends and say that ye wanted to do something for your birthday but also said that ye would like to have a big get together with everyone..

It all depends really are ye planning on going to the reg office that day or having it all in the one venue. If ye pick what ye would like and then work from there it might be easier to plan..

I know one lady who said she was having a christenting and invited all and ended up well after the christening they got married too and surprised everyone.. endless ways to go about it