Younger man

lelo100

Hi I'm 33 and I've met a nice guy but he's only 26. I'm a single mother with a small child. I don't want to waste my time. Do you think there is any chance something serious could come of this or should I just keep looking for someone my own age? I'd really like to meet someone to settle down with.

blue note

lelo100 wrote: »

Hi I'm 33 and I've met a nice guy but he's only 26. I'm a single mother with a small child. I don't want to waste my time. Do you think there is any chance something serious could come of this or should I just keep looking for someone my own age? I'd really like to meet someone to settle down with.

There's every chance, a guy of 26 might very well be thinking about settling down anyway. The sister of a friend of mine has just had a baby with her fiance, she's 35 and he's 27. They're together 4 years.

However, you're right to wonder about it. 26 is around the age where guys start to think about settling down. Some will younger, but some won't for another few years. Without freaking him out I'd try to figure out what he thinks about settling down.

Ursus Horribilis

Nobody can say for sure of course but my thoughts are that the odds are stacked against you. There's a significant age gap for starters. You're getting to an age where you might be thinking about having another child. He might not be thinking that way yet. Are you even at the same stages of your lives? Are you sure he's not just out for the ride and fancies trying an older lady for size. Sorry for being so vulgar but it happens.

I'd also wonder does he really know what taking on the role of stepfather entails? It does depend on what sort of person he is though. He might be more mature than most 26 year old. Only you can answer that.

magneticimpulse

It's hard for anyone on here to say someone is good or not for you simply based on their age. If you give it a couple of weeks or 6 months you should find out more.

Have you asked where he is in his life? Does he have the same goals as you and is he on the same page?

From my own experience I've wasted time with 27 to 30 year olds. It wasn't that they were not looking for a relationship but they wanted to go after 21 to 24 year olds and boost about having a hot young girlfriend. Obviously not all guys are like that but that was my experience.

lelo100

Thanks guys. It's so hard to know what to do. Weather to give him a chance or not. 🙈🙉

CaraMay

Definitely do. 3 of my friends are married to guys more than 6 years younger (6 years, 9 years and 10 years) than them. They had similar concerns but it's down to the individual. Take it slow like you would any other relationship but definitely go for it.

Ursus Horribilis

Well sure look, give it a go anyway. What have you got to lose?

lelo100

Odus fell down wrote: »

Well sure look, give it a go anyway. What have you got to lose?

Time lol

lelo100

Odus fell down wrote: »

Well sure look, give it a go anyway. What have you got to lose?

Time lol

kylith

My brother married a woman 8 years older than him who had children. You may as well give it a shot.

CaraMay

lelo100 wrote: »

Time lol

We maybe your gut is telling you something if that is the way you feel

StanleyOllie

The maturity of the guy would be the main concern. You have a child... that must have been a consideration for him when you met. But it hasnt put him off. So there's a bonus point for him. Give it a little time and see where he is at with life and how he continues to react with the responsibilities you have in your life. Its worth giving him a few weeks. He could have fallen for you and be ready for serious relationship. Just make sure he isnt a player.

acon2119

I wouldn't dismiss him that quick because of his age, if your just not feeling it for him then yeah don't waste time with him but give him a chance to see if its going anywhere. You don't have to wait around for years on him, I'm sure you'd have a good idea if there's any potential in this relationship after a few months.

Lux23

lelo100 wrote: »

Hi I'm 33 and I've met a nice guy but he's only 26. I'm a single mother with a small child. I don't want to waste my time. Do you think there is any chance something serious could come of this or should I just keep looking for someone my own age? I'd really like to meet someone to settle down with.

Well do you like him? I don't think you will ever be wasting time if you like the guy!

lelo100

Thanks guys. I went on the date. He was nice. He was very full on in the car on the way home lol. So I'm not into that. But he was grand about it when u told him that. He asked to meet again. But I think I'm gonna say no. I really really want to meet 'the one' and I don't think he's him if ya get me

PsychoSue

So you're not even in a relationship with him. This was all about whether you should go on a FIRST date or not.
Have you ever heard of the expression of kissing a lot of frogs before finding your Prince?!?!
Well if you don't even give guys a chance and are looking for faults/problems before the first date you'll get no where.
Be more open-minded and FORGET age, think simple - Do you like them? If the answer is yes give them a chance, if the date doesn't go the way you'd like then cut your losses but at least give them a chance first, age really means nothing for some guys.
My brother is 22 and may as well be 12 whereas some of his friends act like they're settled 42 year old men. It's purely maturity and you won't see that unless you at least try to get to know them....

lelo100

PsychoSue wrote: »

So you're not even in a relationship with him. This was all about whether you should go on a FIRST date or not.
Have you ever heard of the expression of kissing a lot of frogs before finding your Prince?!?!
Well if you don't even give guys a chance and are looking for faults/problems before the first date you'll get no where.
Be more open-minded and FORGET age, think simple - Do you like them? If the answer is yes give them a chance, if the date doesn't go the way you'd like then cut your losses but at least give them a chance first, age really means nothing for some guys.
My brother is 22 and may as well be 12 whereas some of his friends act like they're settled 42 year old men. It's purely maturity and you won't see that unless you at least try to get to know them....

Ya you are so right. Thank you for that. I'm just new back to the dating scene and I'm finding it so difficult. But your advice is spot on thank u. I guess I'm putting he cart before the horse so to speak lol

PsychoSue

lelo100 wrote: »

Ya you are so right. Thank you for that. I'm just new back to the dating scene and I'm finding it so difficult. But your advice is spot on thank u. I guess I'm putting he cart before the horse so to speak lol

Yes you are a bit but it's understandable if it's all new to you again AND you've a lil one to think about so you've more reason to be nervous/cautious but give it time, he's out there....