Should i say something?

LegacyUser

Im a guy in my late 30s, was happily married with 3 young kids up until earlier this year. My wife cheated on me and now our marriage is completely over. I was devastated for months - on the verge of depression at times I think looking back now. She was my entire life and I just felt so low when I found out my 'best friend' in my life was lying to me for months...

She never wanted to fix the relationship, i tried everything, suggested counselling, offering space, time but she had no interest. After months of questions i eventually found out there was another guy. He was, and still is, in a long term relationship. I don't know him but I know his girlfriend.

My ex is still in contact with this guy (scumbag) daily who is still with his girlfriend of 7 years - while he continues to cheat on her with my ex...

All i cant think about now is this other woman - i know she is a good person - totally oblivious to what is going on.... I feel like i should tell her that she's being lied to and cheated on... she doesn't deserve to be lied to and cheated on any longer.

I know he won't ever say anything - he's not going to end the relationship.
Should i just keep my head out of it. Id just love to let her know thats she's been lied to for months now... such a horrible thing to go through, the worst feeling in the world - i really feel like i can't bear knowing this and not doing anything about it any longer....

Should i say something?

athtrasna

You'll get a lot of replies here on both sides.

I'll say no because it really is none of your business and will in no way help you to get over the devastation of your marriage ending. You need to look after yourself, you might think you'll feel better after telling the girlfriend but the truth is you won't.

Sorry that you are going through this horrible split but look to the future, your future.

ColeTrain

If you already know the girl then you should let her know IMO. She might find out down the line and ask 'did you know it was going on'.

I'd definitely tell her.

heretochat

I would generally counsel against getting yourself involved in such a scenario as there is always the shot messanger to consider.

In your case I would see the following scenario - you would be coloured as a bitter guy who is out to get the world because his marriage has ended. The other guy will use this angle against you and will probably convince his OH to believe him.

Is it really going to achieve anything you telling her, other than making yourself feel better?

I would stay out of it as he will trip himself up eventually

ManOfMystery

I'd ordinarily advise against getting involved, but in this case you're already involved in a way - you're one quarter of the parties involved here, and this girl - who you know - is in exactly the same situation that you've been in recently. She deserves to know IMO.