Condom Issue

MDwyer

Not really a big deal but I want to see if other lads have had this and how might I deal with it.

Lately as in last couple years I find if I'm very hard once I even begin to put on the condom its like a instant erection killer and tbh its annoying me as I feel like crap. The are sized fine as well its not a circulation issue and its not too loose or anything either.

I'm single at the moment as well so its not like I can get a gf to go on the pill or summit.

Anyone have any advice, I was too embarrassed to say this but fcuk its getting to me now.

Brego888

This is usually a circular problem that's generally rooted in anxiety in my experience. The more you focus on it the worse it gets. You have to try and relax if it's going to get any better. Unfortunately it's difficult to relax when you are putting so much pressure on yourself to perform.
I'd practice on your own with condoms first before trying it again with a partner.

The_Valeyard

Sounds like anxiety or a head issue dude. See your go just to get your testosterone checked and even some viagra until that phase passes

racso1975

Had this issue before. With one particular woman just could not get to put a condom on it!!! would be rock hard prior to it alright but not a hope when it came to putting it on.

Ended up breaking up with her as it became such an issue for me but never had a problem like it since thank god.

@ The_Valeyard I think suggesting somebody experiment with Viagra some real bad advice

Sleepless and Manic

I'm one of those few people who are allergic to Nonoxynol-9 the spermicide they use a lot.

You can get them without it. Could be worth a try.

MDwyer

thanks guys n gals. yeah i have been thinking about my hormone levels actually cause for my age <30 i dont get morning wood or anything. the only thing i can think off is i am on anti depress meds, but id o still get the desire maybe one or twice a week and again can get an erection without a condom i wonder if maybe the sensation with a condom just isnt doing it anymore for me either.

Lovely Bloke

what kind of condom are you using?

Those Durex ones that supposedly make you "last longer" actually contain a mild anesthetic and I just cannot use them without losing ALL feeling in my todge, let alone maintain an erection for the duration.

Floppybits

I had this problem as well, be rock hard and then the condom comes out and down I go. I had to try the different types till I found ones that I could use.

Keane2baMused

MDwyer wrote: »

thanks guys n gals. yeah i have been thinking about my hormone levels actually cause for my age <30 i dont get morning wood or anything. the only thing i can think off is i am on anti depress meds, but id o still get the desire maybe one or twice a week and again can get an erection without a condom i wonder if maybe the sensation with a condom just isnt doing it anymore for me either.

Anti-depressants can have an effect on holding an erection so maybe look at the side effects.


Alot of the time it's psychological and the more you stress about getting it on and staying erect, the less likely you will. Anxiety can really have an effect.

Try and relax and not over think it and in time it shouldn't be an issue. And trying another condom to rule that out is a good idea as others have said.

MDwyer

hmmm yeah i dont know if im allergic as its nearly going down by the time i even put it towards the tip, i cant figure how it would have affected my mind like this.

The only comdoms ive used are the bog standard durex one thing i would say is maybe i found no really pleasure in the feeling and maybe thats whats started the assoication with the condoms and a downer so to speak ha.

maybe there are types that give the real feeling but arent they usually thin and i would worry about it breaking.

but yes i would say the nerves come into it big time now when the thought of a jonny being used and feel the pressure hitting me

Ursus Horribilis

Excuse the crude After-Hours type suggestion here. Maybe you should get a few different packs of condoms, fap to some porn or whatever and practice putting them on and coming in them. It sounds like it's psychological but maybe you've not found ones that fit you.

MDwyer

no trouble odus you might have a point tbh like it might help break the mental block maybe

not being smart but can people rec the names of what brands might help?

Toots

Durex do one called Real Feel which is non-latex and feels quite nice. Durex also have a variety box called Surprise Me which has 40 condoms in, so it'd be like a selection box for your wang :pac: Check out some of those sites like lovehoney or the like, that sell sex toys and condoms etc, they often have condoms in 3 packs like what you'd get in the machines out of the bathroom, so if you got a few different ones of those, it'd work out much cheaper than buying a load of the 9 or 12 packs.

Anti depressants can really mess with your head when it comes to sex related stuff! I was on them for a couple of years, and a side effect listed was 'abnormal orgasms' which for me manifested it as if on a sex scale 0 was not aroused and 10 was orgasm, I couldn't get past 9.5. Hugely frustrating (I'm female) so it could be worth mentioning to your doc if you have no luck with trying different types of condoms.

kylith

It does sound like you're equating condoms with less sensation and your little head is thinking 'why bother'. I've known guys to use the extra safe condoms and then complain that they can't feel anything. The thinner ones are still tested and if used correctly should be no more likely to break.

LegacyUser

Odus fell down wrote: »

Excuse the crude After-Hours type suggestion here. Maybe you should get a few different packs of condoms, fap to some porn or whatever and practice putting them on and coming in them. It sounds like it's psychological but maybe you've not found ones that fit you.

Sorry but this will be counter productive. Continued porn/masturbation will desensitise the OP further than he already is, and the sensation of it is very different from having sex. He will not only be less aroused during real sex but will not have the constant intense stimulation and increased pressure that he is in control of with porn and masturbation,which he will need to maintain his erection. The OP should be increasing his sensitivity, by abstaining from masturbation for a while and using thin feel condoms during sex.

Skoop

marko101 wrote: »

Sorry but this will be counter productive. Continued porn/masturbation will desensitise the OP further than he already is, and the sensation of it is very different from having sex. He will not only be less aroused during real sex but will not have the constant intense stimulation and increased pressure that he is in control of with porn and masturbation,which he will need to maintain his erection. The OP should be increasing his sensitivity, by abstaining from masturbation for a while and using thin feel condoms during sex.

It's happening to him when he's only going to put on the condom, abstaining from masturbation or using different condoms is nothing to do with anything and isn't going to do anything.

You've just psyched yourself out OP. It's a mental thing. What you need to do is not think about it. You've to keep your mind on the road and not be focusing on the gears when you're trying to change them, if you get me. Your mind should be totally focused on your one, her body and the awesome sex things that are going to be happening and just let your hands do thier own separate thing and pop it on.

blue note

I find talking about condoms in an honest way with your partner difficult. Because the truth is that they are brilliant in the protection way, but also a bit crap in terms of enjoyment. Putting then on its a hassle, but it's not too bad. But they majorly numb the sensation and when I'm going for round two it's I sometimes go a little soft with one on. But you don't want to say that they're the problem because it then seems like you're trying to get out of wearing them or guilt the girl into letting you not wear one.

I think the condoms could be the problem op. Maybe try not masturbating for a couple of days before sex that way through excitement you night stay hard more easily. If your girlfriend wants you to wear them you have to, simple as that. Maybe later into the relationship you can explore other methods of contraception.