Bullying in Public Service/TCO

Carlowgirl

Hi all.
Just a quick question in relation to two issues. I am currently working as a tco for the last 2 years or more. I changed departments six months ago and this involved changing buildings and everyone is so friendly and nice. Bar one. There is always one. This woman is making my life hell and she sits in front of me. I am so disappointed as apart from her it couldn't be better.
I have been humiliated, undermined and now persistently ignored. I tried to talk to a co worker but she is friends with her so now she is ignoring me too. Apart from this everyone is lovely but now I am feeling isolated and ignored. I am on a waiting list for the permanent co panel which may or may not come to fruition. If I leave this job will it look bad when / if I am called for a permanent position. I am actually turned off the public service by the way I am been treated at the moment but the ignoring is unbearable for me .
Should I leave ? Will it affect me been called for a permanent role / the permanent role will not be in this sector most likely.
How do people deal with these issues when they are temporary?

Carlowgirl

Anyone out there please help ..

Dr Sunshine

Hi. Sorry to hear youre having a tough time. There's one like that in most offices. It's likely that some of the others have also been on the receiving end of this woman. My advice to you would be to keep a record of anything she does/says that you feel undermines you.

Also bullies often back down if you stand up to them, you could tell her you won't be spoken to that way and if she continues you will report it to HR. If you're only on a temporary contract you might be best not to go down the whole Bullying and Harassment route. With a bit of luck you'll get something permanent soon.

Slydice

I agree. Keep a record of what events happen.

Contact the Civil Service Employee Assistance Service. It's 100% confidential once you don't plan on taking the law into your own hands
http://cseas.per.gov.ie/eao-contact-details/

Bullying doesn't affect anyones chances at getting a permanent position. It all generally competency based recruitment these days.

Carlowgirl

I have been keeping a record of the major things. I don't want to go down that road. I suppose I need to know is it bad if I quit. I feel the ignoring is unbearable now it is self depreciating / embarrassing if that makes sense. I feel my dignity is slowly slipping away and I am flustered and anxious outside of work. I have even talked to a counsellor and it happened helped any bit. Should I leave or will it affect me getting the permanent position i.e they will ask why I left?

Slydice

The first thing I should say to you is that I'm no expert. Really I'm not.

The Civil Service Employee Assistance Service are the people to contact (email and phone numbers here: http://cseas.per.gov.ie/eao-contact-details/).

They would be the people I straight up thought would be the people to contact. They always say they are confidential. They say they even refuse to tell details to even friends of the person.

Have you already done the interview for the permanent position?

Getoffmytrain

Ask to be moved away so that she's not sitting near you, most managers will do this when 2 employees aren't getting along.

SJ.

I think the advice to contact the EAS is good. It can help to talk to someone who knows the service, and who is sympathetic.

If you leave, it won't impact your chances on the CO panel, so if you feel that is best for you, you can do so. Do what's best for yourself, but I would hope that your management and personnel structures would be able to help improve things for you.

Mrs OBumble

You are going to meet people like this pretty much everywhere you go in your career - public or private sector.

By all means do what you need to do to stay mentally healthy for now.

And yes, bullying from colleagues is unacceptable. But to fix it, your manager needs to be asked to deal with it.

But you also need to learn to deal with difficult situations without just leaving. Asking for help from your manager is the first step, and maybe it would be better to try that approach first.

ohnonotgmail

Do you actually need to interact with this person in order to do your work? If no then ignore her and forget about it. If you do need to interact with her and her ignoring you is impacting on your work then you need to talk to your manager.

Carlowgirl

Thanks for all the replies. To answer yere questions , yes I have the interview done and passed, I do need to interact with her sometimes and its like walking on egg shells. One poster mentioned I need to learn to deal with people like this and I completely agree. When this started , I said that to myself and made it my mission to deal with it. I even read up / tried practicing mindfulness techniques. It worked for a while but things got worse again. On top of the ignoring , I am purposely given misleading information such as a) we do it this way and then b) no we don't do that. I cant go into detail obviously but it purposely to confuse and undermine me.
My supervisor is a lovely person and has been on sick leave for some time. I really don't want to cause any trouble. I just don't want to be coming home upset every day and thinking about it over the weekend, but that is what is happening now unfortunately.

Ursus Horribilis

I think you should look into ways of coping with this wagon. As Mrs O'Bumble has rightly pointed out, people like her populate workplaces the length and breadth of the country :mad: Now would be a great time to get some help (counselling etc.) and develop strategies to deal with her. Better still, it's free in the short term. Also if you found that mindfulness helped at the start, it might be worth trying again. But if you can, give the EAP people a buzz.

Regarding the misleading information she's giving, is there anyone else in your office you could ask? If you're subtle about it, you could hang her out to dry a bit. Is your supervisor back in work yet? If not, who's supervising you? There has to be someone. You could go to them and ask for clarification about certain matters. You could say "I thought I was supposed to do X, then Y but I'm told that's not the case?"

McSween

Good luck. I worked with several tco's last year and we all agreed there were a small group here and there that wanted nothing to do with us. Horrible people who stuck in their cliques, I urge you to stick at it and win this situation. I really hope you do. It is funny how people like this can be in their 20s and 30s and the old bat lookalikes can be the nicer people.

bobbysands81

Carlowgirl wrote: »

Thanks for all the replies. To answer yere questions , yes I have the interview done and passed, I do need to interact with her sometimes and its like walking on egg shells. One poster mentioned I need to learn to deal with people like this and I completely agree. When this started , I said that to myself and made it my mission to deal with it. I even read up / tried practicing mindfulness techniques. It worked for a while but things got worse again. On top of the ignoring , I am purposely given misleading information such as a) we do it this way and then b) no we don't do that. I cant go into detail obviously but it purposely to confuse and undermine me.
My supervisor is a lovely person and has been on sick leave for some time. I really don't want to cause any trouble. I just don't want to be coming home upset every day and thinking about it over the weekend, but that is what is happening now unfortunately.

As someone else has posted, contact your Employee Assistance Officer for confidential support on how to deal with this issue. www.cseas.per.gov.ie

There's a new anti-bullying and harassment policy in the Civil Service - you can read it here - http://hr.per.gov.ie/files/2015/02/here.pdf

Nobody should have to put up with bullying, take the steps above to end it.

Ursus Horribilis

And you know, if you are the sort of person who has a tendency to be bullied or cowed (I'm not suggesting you are, just throwing it out there), now is a great time to get it sorted. While you're the job you're in, you can get help and assistance without having to pay for it.

nimbus

I had a similar problem in DCP it's not nice and no one does anything about it even the manager,you feel vunerabke because you are on a temporary contract, I am in a different area now so no issues this time.
I did stand up to the person and they tried to turn it on me saying I was rude to her.
Best of luck and take the advice from above