Went looking for a Gents Massage in town....folk r so judgmental!!

Under_Graduate

It's like this.

I've taken a break from working out over the past while, but over the last week or so, have been getting back into it.

Well, it was a bit of a shock to the body.
Some serious aches and pains - deadlifting, squats and clean and jerks - I was basically aching all over, to the point where I was in pain climbing the stairs.

So - when I was working out regularly before, I used to go for a massage every week.
But that was abroad - not in Ireland.

So, the natural thing to do would be to find a massage parlor and get a good deep tissue massage.

Well, I'm based in a relatively small town in the west, so we mainly have spa massages in hotels which, from what I understand, do not really offer what I would be looking for, and they cost a God Damn arm and a leg.


So, I browsed online.
Saw a place that does "Reiki" massage.
Checked it out. Not suitable; I ask them anyplace that might be...
They direct me to a couple of beauty Salons near by.

Well.....


I go up the stairs and in the door to this "beauty salon".
Had never been to a beauty salon before.
No need I guess.
So I'd absolutely no preconceived ideas of how I might be met, or how they might regard a male, on the premise.

I push the door open.
Nice looking joint. Display cabinets, bright, clean, modern.

I see the receptionist. Fairly young gal. Irish. Late 20's early 30's I would say.
She glances at me, and suddenly this look crosses her face as if she's just been engulfed in an unpleasant odor.

She quickly returns her attention to the computer screen behind the reception desk, like she's trying to ignore the fact that - holy cow - there's a man on the property!

I have to catch her attention again by saying, "hello, good afternoon", at which stage she looks at me like I've just rudely interrupted her.

I make the mistake of jumping right to the point, instead of clarifying that I'm only here as a desperate last resort, and am in genuine physical discomfort.

"Do you offer a gents massage in here?".

Again, she fixes me with this fleeting stare, whilst her upper lip flickers in what appears to be disgust.

"Oh, we do massage, but not for men", she curtly responds, and again returns her attention to her computer monitor, like she's absorbed in coding a new ground breaking computer application for Microsoft.


Two ladies are sat to my right, one getting nails done, the other doing.
As soon as they've overheard my question, they seem to stiffen as if a bolt of electricity has just shot through them, and they both slowly turn to face me, with what appears to be apprehension, mixed with morbid curiosity - like they're bearing witness to a real life pervert, potential sex offender material.

Now I know what you're thinking.

"You're reading too much into this pal. They probably barely noticed you etc etc".

Whether you choose to believe or no, there was this unmistakable air of revolt that permeated the place.

Being met with this curt response, which was followed by a deliberate indifference which basically said, "please get the f%ck off the property immediately", I was kind of, well, I guess, momentarily abashed.

I asked if she could recommend a place that may offer this service.
She mentioned the name of a spa I had researched, which cost more than a full course meal with a bottle of wine, for a half hour massage.

I sheepishly made my way to the door, I suppose you could say, completely taken aback, at how judgmental these supposedly innocent everyday places could be.
In my mind, the "beauty salon", now represents a den of feminism, where men are abhorred, and are looked on as reprehensible sexual predators.


Anyways - to conclude this lengthy narrative, I did eventually find somewhere to cater to my requirement.

Out of painful desperation, I went into a foreign owned tanning salon to inquire.
The gay owner gave me the contact details of a lady friend of his who worked from home, who specialized in deep tissue massages, for a reasonable price.

Made an appointment, had a great session, all above board.
Nothing to be afraid of.

Sheesh!

The Moldy Gowl

How was the ****? Did she use lube?

sonny.knowles

Was the masseuse hot? Did she give you wood?

biko

TLDR: went for massage, was good.

mad muffin

So you got your happy ending…

If you'd asked for a deep tissue massage from the off instead of a 'gent's massage' you might have had a more favourable response.

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

If you'd asked for a deep tissue massage from the off instead of a 'gent's massage' you might have had a more favourable response.

Actually I think I may have thrown that in there.

Or "sports" massage, something like that was the terminology I used.

I didn't matter.
They seemed determined to regard me as sex-offender material.

Under_Graduate

Under_Graduate wrote: »

Actually I think I may have thrown that in there.

Or "sports" massage, something like that was the terminology I used.

I didn't matter.
They seemed determined to regard me as sex-offender material.

Or they just don't offer either 'gent's' or sports massage.

Personally, I think they were probably just surprised you pitched into a beauty salon for a sports massage. Or a 'gents' one, which may suggest something else.

corkgsxr

If gotten full body from several beauty places. Never had a bother myself

The Sidewards Man

Did she show you her fridge?

sonny.knowles

The Sidewards Man wrote: »

Did she show you her fridge?

That's a new one for me. Closest I'm aware of would probably be box.

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

Or they just don't offer either 'gent's' or sports massage.

Personally, I think they were probably just surprised you pitched into a beauty salon for a sports massage. Or a 'gents' one, which may suggest something else.

Umm, I'm not sure their reactions screamed "surprise" at me.

Hell, for all I know, there could be a steady stream of guys walking in their looking for massage with happy ending.

eternal

It must have been the TK Max outfit that you were wearing.

One eyed Jack

Under_Graduate wrote: »

Made an appointment, had a great session, all above board.
Nothing to be afraid of.

Sheesh!

Definition of anti-climax ending right there after reading through all that

Under_Graduate

Under_Graduate wrote: »

Umm, I'm not sure their reactions screamed "surprise" at me.

Hell, for all I know, there could be a steady stream of guys walking in their looking for massage with happy ending.

If you asked for a 'gent's massage' as per the OP, then their reactions probably screamed suspicion.

It does have certain massage parlour connotations.

Sariah

I am female. I recently went for a Thai massage and had to ring my husband when I got out as I wasn't sure if I had been unfaithful....

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

If you asked for a 'gent's massage' as per the OP, then their reactions probably screamed suspicion.

It does have certain massage parlour connotations.

Mmm, perhaps.

Though, I have to say, from the moment the receptionist noticed my presence, she looked thoroughly offended that I had even dared set foot in the place.

Regardless of terminology, I think I would have gotten the same response.

I'm just surprised myself that, yeah, what else can I refer to it as but, feminist attitude (or I could say, bitchiness), was so forthcoming in a modern open facility.

If I'd walked into a ladies clothes store and told them I was experimenting as a cross dresser, well, then I could understand but, this was totally reasonable.
Hell, they might respond better to a request like that.
You never know what goes 'round in the heads of them crazy feminazi's.

Under_Graduate

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Definition of anti-climax ending right there after reading through all that

Well, if it's any kind of addition, the masseuse was pretty hot.

But no.
No funny business went on.

Ruu

Well it would help if you approach the right way. Here is the wrong way.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bO3hEk9a-Vg

Under_Graduate

Sariah wrote: »

I am female. I recently went for a Thai massage and had to ring my husband when I got out as I wasn't sure if I had been unfaithful....

You mean to tell me you're gonna post that little teaser with giving us details???

Under_Graduate

Under_Graduate wrote: »

Mmm, perhaps.

Though, I have to say, from the moment the receptionist noticed my presence, she looked thoroughly offended that I had even dared set foot in the place.

Regardless of terminology, I think I would have gotten the same response.

I'm just surprised myself that, yeah, what else can I refer to it as but, feminist attitude (or I could say, bitchiness), was so forthcoming in a modern open facility.

If I'd walked into a ladies clothes store and told them I was experimenting as a cross dresser, well, then I could understand but, this was totally reasonable.
Hell, they might respond better to a request like that.
You never know what goes 'round in the heads of them crazy feminazi's.

You were treated with suspicion after going into a beauty salon and asking for a 'gent's massage'. Which to be fair, sounds like you're looking for a different kind of massage option.

This makes them crazy feminazis.

Makes perfect sense.

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

You were treated with suspicion after going into a beauty salon and asking for a 'gent's massage'. Which to be fair, sounds like you're looking for a different kind of massage option.

This makes them crazy feminazis.

Makes perfect sense.

hahaha

You just won't let it go, will you?

Medusa22

When I read the title of the thread I was thinking that the OP was looking for a massage with a happy ending and was annoyed when he was told to feck off. I am so disappointed about the reality

Under_Graduate

Under_Graduate wrote: »

hahaha

You just won't let it go, will you?

I would have to be blind, deaf, dumb, and deficient not to get your agenda.

Greenmachine

biko wrote: »

TLDR: went for massage, was good.

Finally googled TLDR.

Aint Eazy Being Cheezy

I was getting a massage the other day and I asked the masseuse if it was normal for a man to get an erection during the massage.
He replied that it was.
So I asked him to please get it out of my face.

MEGA BRO WOLF 5000

Hi OP, you used text speak in the title of your thread therefore I didn't read any of your first post.

Honey monster.

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

I would have to be blind, deaf, dumb, and deficient not to get your agenda.

My, agenda??

Pfff - I thought them chicks is the "beauty salon" were judgmental.

Sheesh!

You might as well just stand up, point and yell, "sex offender people! This guy is sex offender material right here!!".

No wonder you got offended at the mention of "feminazi's".
It's obviously a little to close to the bone for your liking.

The Moldy Gowl

The Honey Monster wrote: »

Hi OP, you used text speak in the title of your thread therefore I didn't read any of your first post.

Honey monster.

Probably because you are illiterate.



I lie. I just went for the first comment for the thanks.

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

I would have to be blind, deaf, dumb, and deficient not to get your agenda.

Don't forget "delusional", you forget "delusional".
The five D's.
Add to that little alliterative string you got going on there.

Chicks love throwing that word around.

"Oh my God, that guy. Who does he think he is?? Soooo delusional!!".

osarusan

I'm looking for a gent's massage.

Under_Graduate

Under_Graduate wrote: »

My, agenda??

Pfff - I thought them chicks is the "beauty salon" were judgmental.

Sheesh!

You might as well just stand up, point and yell, "sex offender people! This guy is sex offender material right here!!".

No wonder you got offended at the mention of "feminazi's".
It's obviously a little to close to the bone for your liking.

Under_Graduate wrote: »

Don't forget "delusional", you forget "delusional".
The five D's.
Add to that little alliterative string you got going on there.

Chicks love throwing that word around.

"Oh my God, that guy. Who does he think he is?? Soooo delusional!!".

You seem so nice. I've no idea how those feminazi chicks might have gotten the wrong idea.

It's a mystery.

Under_Graduate

Candie wrote: »

You seem so nice. I've no idea how those feminazi chicks might have gotten the wrong idea.

It's a mystery.

Weak sauce.

One eyed Jack

Under_Graduate wrote: »

Mmm, perhaps.

Though, I have to say, from the moment the receptionist noticed my presence, she looked thoroughly offended that I had even dared set foot in the place.

Regardless of terminology, I think I would have gotten the same response.

I'm just surprised myself that, yeah, what else can I refer to it as but, feminist attitude (or I could say, bitchiness), was so forthcoming in a modern open facility.

If I'd walked into a ladies clothes store and told them I was experimenting as a cross dresser, well, then I could understand but, this was totally reasonable.
Hell, they might respond better to a request like that.
You never know what goes 'round in the heads of them crazy feminazi's.

Wow! :pac:

I can understand now OP why communication may have broken down. They saw your attitude coming a mile away if that post is any indication of what you were thinking at the time. Nobody has to be a mind reader to sense when something just ain't kosher about someone. That's likely why you got the short shrift.

Ps: If you walked into a ladies clothing store with that same attitude written all over your face, you'd likely get short shrift there too.

Under_Graduate

One eyed Jack wrote: »

Wow! :pac:

I can understand now OP why communication may have broken down. They saw your attitude coming a mile away if that post is any indication of what you were thinking at the time. Nobody has to be a mind reader to sense when something just ain't kosher about someone. That's likely why you got the short shrift.

Ps: If you walked into a ladies clothing store with that same attitude written all over your face, you'd likely get short shrift there too.

I thought you were just concerned about getting the gory details of the happy ending.... Jackie.

One eyed Jack

osarusan wrote: »

I'm looking for a gent's massage.

Ahh now, it's not as though the OP went looking for that sort of a massage at all...


Nope, not, at, all...

Peregrine

Under_Graduate wrote: »

I'm just surprised myself that, yeah, what else can I refer to it as but, feminist attitude (or I could say, bitchiness), was so forthcoming in a modern open facility.

You never know what goes 'round in the heads of them crazy feminazi's.

Spot the agenda.

Don't post crap like this again.