Texting your ex back, is this the opportune time??

Pirlo21

Hello everyone ill try and keep this short and sweet and i would appreciate it very much if you kindly give me your opinion.

So as you can see my question related to txting my ex girlfriend.
Bassically its been just over a year now since we broke up(i broke up with her). The reason behind this is that at the time i was living in Germany and i had left to come back home to Ireland to start a career in the Army( its a career ive always wanted and they didnt recruit for a long time). A recruitment opportunity came up and i took it.
The few months leading up to when i left i was flying back and forth for the recruitment process. We always talked about how everything would be okay when i left etc. But i knew deep down in my heart it wouldnt have worked. I never stopped loving her and felt it was the right thing to do.

I just wanted her to be happy.
The breakup was nasty but i did it for her own good. I left her thinking about her.

So lets get to the point. By the way shes German
A few weeks ago it was her Birthday so naturally enough i sent her a simple Happy Birthday message on FB. That was fine all and good.
Recently it was my Birthday and i had hoped maybe she would do the same.
To my surprise i actually did receive Birthday msg but unlike mine she sent me a personal message.
Now usually she would write to me in German but again to my surprise it was in English.

I thanked her for the birthday wish plain and simple not acting overly joyed or anything but it did put a smile on my face. I really want to get in contact with her again.
As it turns out im actually flying to Germany in little over a week and would like to see her, only thing is im actually afraid to write to her. I thought about her every day in recruit training 17 weeks finishing next week.

So i guess is this the opportune time to try and restablish contact? Especially how she wrote a personal message. Is she trying to send me a sign?

Please help
Killian

Tell me how

Pirlo21 wrote:

So i guess is this the opportune time to try and restablish contact? Especially how she wrote a personal message. Is she trying to send me a sign?

Absolutely impossible for anyone to say exactly what's happening here.

This is "an" opportune time not necessarily "the" opportune time.

Text and let her know you're going to be around if she'd fancy meeting up. If she says no, you have your answer, if she says yes then meet as friends and see how it goes.

retro:electro

Hmmm not a great idea to be honest. Look at it from her perspective, you broke up with her and now you want to get back in touch for what exactly? To see her for a few days and then take off and leave her to get over you all over again? What are you hoping to get from seeing her? Will it be beneficial to her too? Or just open up old wounds?

Ann84

Why do you want to get in touch OP? What is opportune exactly...?

I don't see in your post that anything has changed since you broke up with her in relation to the reasons you give for breaking up aside from now you miss her!
Unless you have a plan as to 'what happens next', I'd leave her alone, you broke her heart (I'm assuming!) so don't do it again...

Mr. Incognito

Unless you want to get back together leave her alone

ivytwine

Are you just looking for something casual? If so, tell her that... But don't expect her to be cool with it.

Relationship wise, if you're in the army now, is it not likely you'll be deployed abroad? That would test even the strongest relationship... You guys don't have one anymore and plus she's not even in Ireland... If she was she might be able to meet up with women in similar situation through PDFORRA or whatever (not 100% on this stuff so forgive me for any mistakes) but she'll be in a very lonely position in Germany.

I don't really see any consideration for her in your post. If she's got feelings for you still then the decent thing to do is leave her alone rather than building her hopes up. I know you miss her but at the moment practicalities are standing in the way.

Merkin

So why exactly do you want to get back in touch? What are your objectives?

Exclamation Marc

I'm assuming you're looking to re-establish a relationship.

Unless you're planning to move to Germany and live there full time with her, you'll come off as bit of a hypocrite in that you broke up with her because of it being long-distance yet now you want to get back together even though it would be a long-distance relationship again because of you either not living in Germany or being in the army.

If you're just looking to meet up as friends, then there's no harm in suggesting it.

Dellnum

No harm in sending her a msg telling her you will be in Germany if she would like to meet up with you. I am sure she is over you by now so meeting you wouldn't cost her a thought. Then you can see from her reaction whether you should take it any further or not. Don't be afraid to write to let her know you would like to meet her next week. I think it is a nice idea.