Dirty housemates

Nicola20

This might seem trivial but I really need some advice on how to deal with housemates who don't keep the house clean.

I've only lived in my current property two months, but I'm starting to get frustrated by how little my housemates do around the house.

I cleaned for 4 hours on Sunday the first couple of weekends because it was becoming unpleasant to go into the kitchen. I since mentioned to all four other housemates that we should try and share out tasks like Hoovering and cleaning the sink, but none of them have since done anything.

It's unpleasant for me because my room is the only one downstairs. On a few occasions I've had flies come from the kitchen into my room. I'm worried we'll get mice/rats because food is left open.

I get up first in the morning and there are loads of crumbs/pieces of food and last nights dishes left in the sink.

I've mentioned it to the owner/occupier and I think he sympathises but he hasn't done anything about it.

Any help appreciated.

Peregrinus

Move out, I'm afraid. You're not going to change your housemates' standards, habits or behaviours, and as matters stand these don't sound like the kind of housemates that you want to share a house with.

handlemaster

Move.. People wont change for you

B.A._Baracus

I too suggest you move on if you can. As others say you won't change people's habits but more worryingly you cleaning could become the norm. Leaving everything up to you because you do a bit.

Which would really annoy you.

This has been the story in my last houseshares and my current one. I clean the kitchen and give it a sweep once a week or maybe once every two weeks and do a hover every few months of the living room etc but my housemates have never even lifted a finger to do a single bit of cleaning and leave dishes in the sick for weeks at times. I dot feel it's my job to clean after them so I do the minimum to keep the place liveable but some people just don't care. Rubbish would be piling up on the floor beside the bin and they wouldn't change the bag as an example.

handlemaster

This is the kind of thing house sharers put up with just imagine the c***p landlords are faced when such properties are returned and tenants complain about a cleaning fee

handlemaster

handlemaster wrote: »

This is the kind of thing house sharers put up with just imagine the c***p landlords are faced when such properties are returned and tenants complain about a cleaning fee

The bit of cleaning I do keeps the place sort of half reasonable to be fair, not as clean as I'd like it but okish.

I can't imagine the place though if I wasn't living there, the cooker would be absolutely destroyed anyway as its already not great due to one housemate always letting stuff he is cooking boil over and then he would cook something on the hob caked in food again the next day without cleaning it.

Seanachai

Channing Salty Fast-food wrote: »

The bit of cleaning I do keeps the place sort of half reasonable to be fair, not as clean as I'd like it but okish.

I can't imagine the place though if I wasn't living there, the cooker would be absolutely destroyed anyway as its already not great due to one housemate always letting stuff he is cooking boil over and then he would cook something on the hob caked in food again the next day without cleaning it.

I understand your situation, I lived in house-shares in my twenties and I can safely say that I will never voluntarily do so again. I went through the whole gamut from having my food stolen to trying to sleep through mad parties. I would consider just finding your own place, once you adjust you'll never want to go back unless you get into a relationship which is a different thing. I know it's tricky at the moment with the lack of studio flats, I don't know what age you are or what your budget is but if you're over 25 I'd leave the house-share scene behind.

Seanachai

Seanachai wrote: »

I understand your situation, I lived in house-shares in my twenties and I can safely say that I will never voluntarily do so again. I went through the whole gamut from having my food stolen to trying to sleep through mad parties. I would consider just finding your own place, once you adjust you'll never want to go back unless you get into a relationship which is a different thing. I know it's tricky at the moment with the lack of studio flats, I don't know what age you are or what your budget is but if you're over 25 I'd leave the house-share scene behind.

Trust me I do want to leave it behind I'm absolutely sick if it and never liked it to begin with. I could afford to rent alone now (circumstances changed since I started sharing) but I can't justify the cost of it. I'm happier to be saving a good bit of money towards buying at the minute. Moving in with my gf is the best of both really but that's not possible at the moment.

To be fair while there are very annoying things about my houseshare I basically have the common areas to myself most all the time due to housemates being out or in their room which is a massive advantage which somewhat balances with their complete lack of wanting to clean. I think a houseshare where all housemates were around the living room kitchen, wanting to watch tv together etc would be more difficult to be honest even if it was kept better. I have the the living room to myself every evening and all weekend which is rare in a houseshare.

On the ops question there isn't really much he can do, I've said it about keeping the kitchen tidy and it works for a day or two and gets forgotten about some people just don't get it and you can't keep saying it over and over. They aren't even doing it out of badness they just don't understand in my opinion, maybe that's how it was done at home. I know my home place is kept spotless and always was.

newacc2015

My parents are landlord. In my experience females tenants are the worst. You will find literally piles of clothes in their rooms, the bins will be overflowing and there might be 7/8 black bags of rotting food in the kitchen. I find men can be as messy, but men will eventually clean the place when the dirt is too much. Females rarely do this.

Have you considered a cleaning roster OP? One thing I have noticed from my parents. They will tell the tenants to clean the house before moving out. The tenants will often think washing the floor and emptying the bins is a deep clean. You literally need to give them a checklist of what to do eg clean oven, wash shower door, put cif on the sink. Your house might not be as dirty, if your room mates actually knew what they have to clean. It sounds stupid, but I guarantee your housemates probably dont know how to clean more so than they are too lazy to clean.

MAJJ

Maybe get a cleaner in once a week for two hours. Cost will about 25 so split with the house share. Hard to change others habits and if you don't want to move may be the only option other than diy

Seanachai

Channing Salty Fast-food wrote: »

Trust me I do want to leave it behind I'm absolutely sick if it and never liked it to begin with. I could afford to rent alone now (circumstances changed since I started sharing) but I can't justify the cost of it. I'm happier to be saving a good bit of money towards buying at the minute. Moving in with my gf is the best of both really but that's not possible at the moment.

To be fair while there are very annoying things about my houseshare I basically have the common areas to myself most all the time due to housemates being out or in their room which is a massive advantage which somewhat balances with their complete lack of wanting to clean. I think a houseshare where all housemates were around the living room kitchen, wanting to watch tv together etc would be more difficult to be honest even if it was kept better. I have the the living room to myself every evening and all weekend which is rare in a houseshare.

Having the place to yourself on the weekend is a major bonus and if they're not in your space generally then the messiness issue is tolerable. If you have a long term plan then I suppose it makes it more bearable as there's light at the end of the tunnel. I have a brother in Australia who had to move to the other side of town as there were heavy Estonian characters coming into the house for parties and then started drug dealing. The Estonian housemate they were linked to kept hounding him trying to get another house together so he had to cut the ties with him. In comparison you're probably okay where you are for the time being

athtrasna

If the owner occupier doesn't care enough about their property to address the issue then OP you've no option other than to move out or put up with it. Really shocked that there's a resident landlord in this case. I'm guessing the property may have been inherited rather than worked for if this is the case

Jonti

wrote:

Move out and leave them to wallow in their own ****!!

NoCrackHaving

Some people genuinely don't see dirtiness or messiness as an issue and there's nothing you can do to change this.

Nicola20

Thanks for all the replies. I think I'm going to mention it again to the owner tonight, in fairness I have only mentioned it to him once. The strange thing is I know he did work for and buy the house, and also the house is freshly painted with a new kitchen and he is the DIY sort who is always doing things around the house. I have a feeling it might just be that he wants a quiet life rather than telling people what to do. Also, he is the only person who so much as took out the bins before I arrived...

I am in a situation where I have just moved a long way from home for a new job so looking for somewhere alone isn't something I want to do right now. I've asked one of my housemates (who doesn't work while the rest of us are out all day working) if he would wash the floor while we're gone today, fingers crossed he has done it.

Have started looking at other places to live, had thought about a cleaner but they definitely wouldn't come up with the cash!

athtrasna

athtrasna wrote: »

If the owner occupier doesn't care enough about their property to address the issue then OP you've no option other than to move out or put up with it. Really shocked that there's a resident landlord in this case. I'm guessing the property may have been inherited rather than worked for if this is the case

Funnily enough I have a friend renting a room from another non-mutual friend of his who just bought the house they are living in and my friend was saying she is a right slob.

MrMorooka

Yeah, crap like this is why I chose to live on my own. It is financially a bit more difficult, but not having to worry about what other people do to your living space is worth it. Can keep the place nice and clean the way I like it.

So really OP, the others are right, you should just look to move. Unfortunately it's very difficult to find affordable decent studios(I was lucky). I can guarantee you by the way, that that lad won't have washed the floors when you come back from work tonight.

damn,

saw the title and thought it was a tawdry tale of busty midnight pillow fights and coitus interuptus.... durty...........:D

Tarzana2

newacc2015 wrote: »

My parents are landlord. In my experience females tenants are the worst. You will find literally piles of clothes in their rooms, the bins will be overflowing and there might be 7/8 black bags of rotting food in the kitchen. I find men can be as messy, but men will eventually clean the place when the dirt is too much. Females rarely do this.

The bolded bit is hardly too bad. It's untidy but that's it really. I'd be more concerned at why a landlord would be in a tenant's bedroom to find piles of clothes in the first place! :eek:

Having lived in a fair few houseshares, I've found lads to be messier by a country mile in my own experience. Like, it would never occur to them to clean a microwave or the fridge.

ShaShaBear

Tarzana2 wrote: »

The bolded bit is hardly too bad. It's untidy but that's it really. I'd be more concerned at why a landlord would be in a tenant's bedroom to find piles of clothes in the first place! :eek:

Having lived in a fair few houseshares, I've found lads to be messier by a country mile in my own experience. Like, it would never occur to them to clean a microwave or the fridge.

I have to agree. In all the college houseshares I have been a part of (and I did college twice), I have never, ever, EVER come across a female tenant that leaves 7-8 bags of rubbish/rotten food lying about. Never.

Males? Always! In fact, I have yet to live with a male who wasn't dirty with regards to housework etc - and that includes my current partner.

Balmed Out

ShaShaBear wrote: »

I have to agree. In all the college houseshares I have been a part of (and I did college twice), I have never, ever, EVER come across a female tenant that leaves 7-8 bags of rubbish/rotten food lying about. Never.

Males? Always! In fact, I have yet to live with a male who wasn't dirty with regards to housework etc - and that includes my current partner.

I imagine theres good and bad of both. I havent ever lived with anybody as bad as to leave several bags of rubbish about but anecdotally most girls ive lived with have kept their own rooms very untidy - not unhygienic but very messy.

_Kaiser_

As someone posted above, this is why I rent alone - even though it involves a bit of a commute to be viable (on the upside I have a 2 bed to myself so more living space for about half what'd it cost in Dublin)

I lived in a house share when I was in my 20s and for the main it was ok (also because one of the lads owned the place) but there was still generally a untidy/grubbiness a lot of the time which I nver particularly liked (but which thewre was no point trying to do something about either), but now that I'm a bit older I just couldn't be dealing with that, or even other people (unless I was in a relationship) after a long day in work!

mapaca

You could all chip in together for a cleaner - would be worth the extra few quid for some peace of mind!

Even if it was just once a week?

NoCrackHaving

mapaca wrote: »

You could all chip in together for a cleaner - would be worth the extra few quid for some peace of mind!

Even if it was just once a week?

There's not a hope these people will chip in towards a cleaner.

NoCrackHaving

NoCrackHaving wrote: »

There's not a hope these people will chip in towards a cleaner.

I like to get a cleaner myself too, in fact I'd intend on having a cleaner when I do have my own place and even though I'd be willing to pay for it then I would not pay for the full cost of a cleaner now on principal (paying to clean other peoples mess) and no way the others would want one I would imagine.

Nicola20

No hope they will chip in for a cleaner.

I think I'm fighting a losing battle because I heard the owner/occupier mention to another housemate about a cleaning rota, and the other housemate basically painted me as some type of a 'hysterical female' who doesn't have a clue when it comes to how clean the house is compared to other places. Sorry, but I don't think flies in the kitchen are an acceptable standard of clean.

Was told by another housemate last night that the housemate who is the main culprit and leaves dishes and food out etc. is an alcoholic. It explains a lot. But he will never pick up the slack, I don't think.

mapaca

Sorry, I posted before reading your comment that they won't chip in for a cleaner. That's crap, it's not pleasant having to put up with other people's mess!

You say you spend a lot of time at home, could you change your routine a bit so you're not there so much? It might not bug you so much if you're out and about more. Other than that, you may have to look for accommodation elsewhere...

ScottStorm

Nicola20 wrote: »

No hope they will chip in for a cleaner.

I think I'm fighting a losing battle because I heard the owner/occupier mention to another housemate about a cleaning rota, and the other housemate basically painted me as some type of a 'hysterical female' who doesn't have a clue when it comes to how clean the house is compared to other places. Sorry, but I don't think flies in the kitchen are an acceptable standard of clean.

Was told by another housemate last night that the housemate who is the main culprit and leaves dishes and food out etc. is an alcoholic. It explains a lot. But he will never pick up the slack, I don't think.

It's not going to get any better and your landlord is a weak idiot. Leave the first chance you get.

SMJSF

Move!!
I had to share with someone back 2013/2014, and only lasted 5 months due to them not understanding the point and cleaning, respect for me and the neighbours and among more serious issues.
Never again and I'm only 21!

Peregrinus

Nicola20 wrote: »

No hope they will chip in for a cleaner.

I think I'm fighting a losing battle because I heard the owner/occupier mention to another housemate about a cleaning rota, and the other housemate basically painted me as some type of a 'hysterical female' . . .

Well, what a surprise.

You have three choices here:

1. Become "that girl who does all the cleaning (so we don't have to)".

2. Become "that harpy who's always bitching and nagging everybody".

3. Leave.

4Marie

Or you could add to the mess, ehem be clever. And give them no choice but to clean up after themselves . Be creative!! Don't get worked up about them ☺ï¸Â

If there dirty dishes are stacked up . Adjust them so that it might fall.

Use every piece of cutlery so there nothing left to use . Forcing them to do something.

Try get one of them on side by bringing up something other than cleaning up

Organise an inspection from the landlord

M

MarkAnthony

I'm an owner occupier slob with a reasonably clean tenant. We were honest when he moved in. We're not too bad but the kitchen does sometimes get left. Just one of those things living with people.

I only say this to it fair do's if you want to push back when I say what on earth were you cleaning for 4 hours! I'd get the whole house done in that time, twice, and to a good standard. I wouldn't do it again for 3 months but 4 hours?!

Definitely some chillaxing needed IMO OP.

Mrs OBumble

Jonti wrote: »

Move out and leave them to wallow in their own ****!!

Or to say it another way, find a bunch of neat-freaks, and move in with them instead. Everyone will be a lot happier.

MarkAnthony wrote: »

what on earth were you cleaning for 4 hours! I'd get the whole house done in that time, twice, and to a good standard. I wouldn't do it again for 3 months but 4 hours?!

This. One time I had a leg injury that meant I couldn't do any housework for a month. So I got allocated home-help of of 2 hours/week. The first week was ok 'cos there was a build-up, but after that there was no way I could keep the woman busy for 2 hours. Modern houses just don't get that dirty.

Tarzana2

Balmed Out wrote: »

I imagine theres good and bad of both. I havent ever lived with anybody as bad as to leave several bags of rubbish about but anecdotally most girls ive lived with have kept their own rooms very untidy - not unhygienic but very messy.

Give me messy over unhygienic any day.

Pawwed Rig

You only need to get the owner occupier onside. Get him to increase the rent by €10 each per month and then hire a cleaner. All the advice to move out really ignores how difficult it is to get accommodation.

RacoonQueen

My house is the same, also live with owner occupier. I do 99% of the cleaning, usually the one bringing bins out etc...they'd leave crumbs all over counters, start piling rubbish on the floor, take bag out of bin and leave it in the middle of the floor etc Don't even bother arguing over it. I like things clean (kitchen and bathroom especially) and like things to have their place. They don't. Not going to argue over it. They'll generally do their own dishes (badly) I then just put the badly washed dishes into the dishwasher. If I get really lucky, the owner will empty the dishwasher every once in a while...or if I'm REALLY, REALLY lucky he'll put the recycling bin out.

Just say FFS really loudly when you walk in to the kitchen, take a deep breath and move on. I am at peace by doing this.

Would live on my own in a heartbeat though.

dannyluvsu

Just move.

I'm pretty allergic to mold and had the same trouble with messy housemates. I tried dividing chores, pleading and even going so far as to dump anything I'd find left out or going bad in the fridge (which just makes me sound like a joy to live with, I know).

The only solution was to keep moving until I found housemates who took a little pride in their living-space.

In the end I found people I had more in common with and had a much better time in my home as a result. There's nothing worse than hating the idea of going home.

Tarzana2

RacoonQueen wrote: »

start piling rubbish on the floor

That's so disgusting. Animals.

Nicola20

MarkAnthony wrote: »

I'm an owner occupier slob with a reasonably clean tenant. We were honest when he moved in. We're not too bad but the kitchen does sometimes get left. Just one of those things living with people.

I only say this to it fair do's if you want to push back when I say what on earth were you cleaning for 4 hours! I'd get the whole house done in that time, twice, and to a good standard. I wouldn't do it again for 3 months but 4 hours?!

Definitely some chillaxing needed IMO OP.

I would really have appreciated when I moved in if they were honest about how clean they were happy to keep the kitchen.

The reason it took four hours was because the kitchen had been left so long before that. Fair play for getting the entire house done - do you want to come and clean mine?

The house has gotten better since I brought it up. There is only one person who has a problem, so I have no problem continuing to nag him!

Thanks for all the messages.

Kobe

Exactly my situation now, my roommates are very dirty, I am lucky if they wash their own dishes or wash their own dishes properly, let alone cleaning the kitchen or toilet.

Pawwed Rig

Nicola20 wrote: »

The house has gotten better since I brought it up. There is only one person who has a problem, so I have no problem continuing to nag him!

Thanks for all the messages.

Not your job to nag him considering you live with an owner occupier. Bear in mind if things go sour with the owner then he can have you out of the house very quickly. It is essential that you keep him onside by not going over the top. Continuously nagging someone who you have already indicated has problems does not seem like an especially nice thing to do.

Nicola20

Pawwed Rig wrote: »

Not your job to nag him considering you live with an owner occupier. Bear in mind if things go sour with the owner then he can have you out of the house very quickly. It is essential that you keep him onside by not going over the top. Continuously nagging someone who you have already indicated has problems does not seem like an especially nice thing to do.

Thanks for the advice. Maybe I chose my words poorly but I don't appreciate the character assessment at the end of your message. You don't have any idea the situation I'm in at the moment with this very aggressive housemate.

Thanks for all the messages, have made up my mind now!

athtrasna

Mod note Posters please remember to attack the post not the poster. Thanks