Unemployed and turning down interviews. Am I being foolish?

LegacyUser

Feeling a bit guilty and confused at the moment. I'm 25 and unemployed. I have a 2.1 honours degree from UCD in what is considered quite a prestigious field. I have been officially unemployed for about a month since I returned home from Canada where I was holidaying with a friend for about 8 months. I've set up 2 job interviews related to my degree set up since I got back and cancelled the both of them.

The truth is I just don't really want to work in that area. I am quite an introspective person and i'm always searching for the answer to what will make me happy in life. And what I know now is that the corporate environment is not something I want to be involved in for the rest of my life. I worked for a year in it and it was soul destroying. The mundanity of the 9-5 slog was just getting me down. I'm also quite socially anxious and introverted and sometimes the energy required to interact with people all day was too much for me. The money was fantastic, but money only really goes so far. I know a lot of other people work in this environment, but I don't want to just settle for something that doesn't fulfill me or even make me remotely happy.

My ultimate ambition is to live a location independent lifestyle because travelling is my main passion. Two career options that stand out when considering this are web development and freelance writing. Getting good enough at web development to find work in it would involve quite a steep learning curve, and I don't know if my writing is to an acceptable standard. I would be interested in both though because they are careers which would suit me better.

To be honest I am just quite torn on what I should be doing. There are expectations from my family to be out there finding a job related to my degree. Also, sitting around the house all week thinking about things isn't good for my mental health or self-esteem. And then there is also the fact I studied for 4 years for my degree to take into account. But I really don't want to work in this field. I'm torn between following my ambition and getting a job in my field because I need to be working and I need money. I am just looking for advice. I feel lost, like most other people my age have all this sh*t sorted out.

prettyrestless

Honestly, I think it was very foolish to cancel the interviews when you have nothing else lined up. It's great to have a dream job to work towards but you have to pay the bills in the meantime. Surely you can do a job you dislike in the short term while you develop your web development and writing skills on the side, so that in a year or two you can have the job you've always wanted.

artanevilla

Even if you don't want the job, doing the interview is good practice for when you find a job you do want. Do the interview, if they offer you the job, and you really don't want it turn it down, nothing lost, interview experience gained.

Bored_lad

If you have a dream job that you want to work towards then by all means do that but if you have no way to support youself during this time wtihout relying on social welfare then you need a job. Yes it was foolish to cancel the interviews and unless you have anything set up I think it's time you went looking for jobs. It is possible to travel while working a normal job.

strandroad

How much freelance writing have you done? Do you get published on a regular basis? Get a day job and keep writing until you do. For now it's all very pie in the sky. Who's paying your bills now?

Heart Break Kid

Work that corporate slog of 9-5, learn all you can,make some evil money and then if you still dont like it leave with a dozen or so pay cheques in your back pocket. Set up your own business, do what you want.

LegacyUser

prettyrestless wrote: »

Honestly, I think it was very foolish to cancel the interviews when you have nothing else lined up. It's great to have a dream job to work towards but you have to pay the bills in the meantime. Surely you can do a job you dislike in the short term while you develop your web development and writing skills on the side, so that in a year or two you can have the job you've always wanted.

Honestly, it'd be either one or the other. If I got a job in this field, it is extremely difficult work which tends to leave me completely mentally drained at the end of every day (disliking it doesn't help). This would leave very little scope to learn web development. Maybe i'd be better off doing some part-time work in a supermarket to get me by.

Another thing I dislike a lot is the structure of modern interviews. I feel like every time I do one, I need to give a complete misrepresentation of myself. I'm not being honest. I'm doing my best to answer questions in a way I think the employer will like them. I need to pretend I'm really interested in this career (which i'm not). I need to answer a load of competency based questions, the answers to which are mostly made-up waffle on my part. I guess i'm just disillusioned with the whole idea of corporate work.

Shelga

You are being foolish IMO. Don't you need money, a reason to get out of bed in the morning?

Taking a job right now doesn't mean you're stuck in the rat race for the next 40 years. It does mean you won't be dependent on others for handouts, presuming you're not independently wealthy.

Figure it while you have a job. I think you should suck it up for now.

Permabear

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LegacyUser

Permabear wrote: »

This post had been deleted.

I dunno, my feeling on the whole thing is that I am dying with every breath I take, why should I take a job in a field that I get zero enjoyment out of. I made some silly mistakes when I picked my college course, I was overly concerned with money. Coming from a working class background, I didn't wanna grow up and have feck all cash, so I picked a career with high monetary rewards.

You're right that I need a job though, I don't dispute that. I don't like sponging off the social welfare. My main concern was being torn over whether I should get one in my field of study or am I better off trying for something in a supermarket part-time. Everyone around me expects me to get a job in this field.

Ursus Horribilis

You're not the first person who has posted here about this sort of problem. All I can say is that should you decide to pursue your "location independent lifestyle" you're going to be competing with lots of other disillusioned people of your age who also want to write and blog and take photos as they travel the globe on a never-ending holiday.

Most of us who hold down these horrible corporate 9-5 rat-race jobs could think of better things to be doing with our days. As it happens, I don't mind my job but I view my wages as a way to enjoy life outside of the office. When you had this job that you hated, did you do anything in the evenings other than sit at home making yourself more miserable? Why do you feel the need to get all the happiness and satisfaction in your life out of your job?

Sometimes people realise that they've studied the wrong course in college and now are in a job that doesn't suit them. When this happens they're faced with two choices. Either suck it up or come up with a Plan B. Plan B usually involves looking into upskilling or retraining. This either means part-time courses/distance learning or the person going back to college full time. Why is your Plan B sitting on your backside at home living on the dole and making excuses for yourself?

LegacyUser

Odus fell down wrote: »

Sometimes people realise that they've studied the wrong course in college and now are in a job that doesn't suit them. When this happens they're faced with two choices. Either suck it up or come up with a Plan B. Plan B usually involves looking into upskilling or retraining. This either means part-time courses/distance learning or the person going back to college full time. Why is your Plan B sitting on your backside at home living on the dole and making excuses for yourself?

Very cynical attitude to what was a genuine question. My plan B is not to sit on my arse, in fact I hate doing that and am sick of it after 4 weeks. But I also don't want to take a job that I know I will hate. I want to learn web development and possibly take up a part-time job to fund every day expenses. But there are expectations on me. My family see me as the intelligent one, I'm expected to be working full-time in a job related to my degree. I also have expectations on myself, I don't want to become the type that relies on the dole to live my life without putting effort in to change things. What i'm saying is that I don't really want a job that I have no passion for, but maybe I should be doing it.

Web Development is very hard to get into and even harder to make money from it as a freelancer, because there's hundreds of people like you. Same as any freelancer - the reason anyone can make good money at it is because they've worked hard at it over a period of years, have built up a vast network in their chosen industry, and have become known as someone who is good at what they do.

If you do want to get into the content production side now, most have moved into Content Management Systems, so what they require is people with either qualifications in writing or experience in it. Do you have either?

Lau2976

Being totally honest it sounds like your only interested in those jobs as a way to travel and, as someone who is a freelance artist, IMO that isn't enough to keep you going in a freelance job.

Freelancing is hard. And takes nearly every hour if every day and when you aren't working, your thinking about working. You do everything yourself, which is great when you love what your doing, but if you don't? I can almost gaurentee that it will be worse then a 9-5. At least you can shut off from that at 5.

Speaking from the pov of an artist, building a solid portfolio and customer base takes years an you have to be prepared to not earn anything at all, something I would imagine is similar to any freelancer.

IMO, take the interviews, If you get them, take the job. It will let you build up the money to travel of that's what you still really want. If you do, the love if traveling will be enoughtogetbyou through most days.

Shelga

whereamigoing1 wrote: »

I am quite an introspective person and i'm always searching for the answer to what will make me happy in life. And what I know now is that the corporate environment is not something I want to be involved in for the rest of my life.

Thinking about this more OP, I think so many young people feel this way when they graduate, because we all have this idea ingrained in us by society that we should be pursuing our dreams and taking chances, working at or creating something we are madly passionate about, blah blah.

For the vast majority of people, it's not an either/or scenario- ie, either I set up my own business and become a millionaire, working my own hours in an exotic location, or I toil away in a mundane drab office for over half my life. The reality is not nearly so black and white, it is very much grey. From my own personal experience, when I stopped expecting my career to make me happy, I became so much happier.

That is not to say I dislike my job at all, I have been working for 4 years now since graduation. However, I was lacking in confidence and my own ability for the first 1-2 years of it, and daydreamed about alternative careers and locations as a quick fix. I felt if I didn't jump out of bed running into work with this crazy enthusiasm, then surely it wasn't the job for me. Could this be something that you're experiencing too? In hindsight, I was unprepared for how long it took me to feel comfortable in the 'grown-up' workplace. Just because you think you won't like it, it definitely doesn't mean you'll always feel this way, and I think you should at least try.

When you realise you're becoming really capable in your role, it's also a huge self-esteem boost. Opportunities began falling into my lap once I stopped agonising over my choice of career and just took it week-to-week, putting in the effort that was required to become a valued member of the team. I'm shortly moving to Asia for a year with work, in a very lucrative move- so sometimes, you can combine both.

I'm not advocating that you resign yourself to doing something you genuinely do not enjoy, but it sounds like you're not giving it a chance.

And yes, bit of entitlement too IMO. Take any-half decent job that comes your way, demonstrate that you don't expect anything easily, and re-assess/take up further study as you go along. But you need to be working.

R.D. aka MR.D

I've been traveling quite extensively for the past 4 years.

Have you considered the option of work-save-travel-work-save-travel. It's what I've done and many others that i know.

Saying that I'm returning to Ireland for the long haul next year because I'm tired of the lifestyle. It'll be a struggle to work my way up but I don't regret it all. I did what I wanted to do, took those risks etc. I'll not be looking back thinking 'what if'.

What you need is a solid plan. How are you going to achieve what you want? Laying around earning nothing won't bring you any closer to it.

Jack B. Badd

Out of curiosity, what kind of a part-time job do you think will pay enough to cover rent, bills, study fees, etc? If you haven't got a savings pot to cover these things (which a part-time job could supplement), you might be well off working full-time for a few years to allow you to save.

Also, most degrees allow some sort of transfer to ongoing study or work in other areas so it's worth investigating this so you're not throwing away your original degree. I didn't notice what area you're qualified in but if it's got high monetary returns I'm going to guess something STEM-related which are very transferrable.

sozbox

Go for it, leave tomorrow, this guy can do it, so can you

http://www.thejournal.ie/irish-travel-world-millionaire-2271635-Aug2015/

kylith

whereamigoing1 wrote: »

Very cynical attitude to what was a genuine question. My plan B is not to sit on my arse, in fact I hate doing that and am sick of it after 4 weeks. But I also don't want to take a job that I know I will hate. I want to learn web development and possibly take up a part-time job to fund every day expenses. But there are expectations on me. My family see me as the intelligent one, I'm expected to be working full-time in a job related to my degree. I also have expectations on myself, I don't want to become the type that relies on the dole to live my life without putting effort in to change things. What i'm saying is that I don't really want a job that I have no passion for, but maybe I should be doing it.

If a job in your field of study leaves you too mentally drained to study then go for a job in Tesco or somewhere while you study.

I have to say though; most people I know who work freelance are living pretty much hand-to-mouth. They might be able to save enough to travel but they live in relatively crappy apartments while they do it.

Dolbert

Sounds like whatever happens, you want to travel for a bit longer, would that be correct? Easiest thing would be to do a TEFL course and teach English in Asia for a year, then reevaluate.

coolbeans

Dolbert wrote: »

Sounds like whatever happens, you want to travel for a bit longer, would that be correct? Easiest thing would be to do a TEFL course and teach English in Asia for a year, then reevaluate.

Sounds like a good idea. Op it's fine to feel the way you do but you shouldn't be on the dole while you remain undecided. Do something, anything but don't do nothing. With respect the dole is not for propping you up when you don't know what to do with yourself. It's for basic subsistence while job searching. You can pursue your dreams while working in a crappy job you know. Most work is honourable and gives you a very basic level of self respect and confidence that you'll never have on the scratcher.

Lux23

Welcome to the real world OP, you spend eight hours + a day working with people you don't like just to pay the bills. Very few people have a dream job. I would suggest getting a full time job and then studying at night to upskill in web development. Maybe you will be one of the lucky ones.

3DataModem

whereamigoing1 wrote: »

i'm always searching for the answer to what will make me happy in life.

The answer to this question is rarely to turn down things, even job interviews.

No job or career or partner or travel will "make" you happy.

Dr Turk Turkelton

Hi op, just my opinion here. I reckon you should follow your dream of lying in bed all day thinking of the nice foreign places you could be instead of Ireland as long as you can support yourself with no help from social welfare.
If you need social welfare to survive then get a job and stop bumming off all the people who go to work everyday to subsidise social welfare and college fees.

zoobizoo

Hey OP,

Do the interviews even if you don't want the jobs because they are good training for when you interview for a job you like.

I would advise doing the job for two or three years and save and see how that goes.

You could then afford to do a Masters part time in an area you want to work in. You can also save for further travel.

Many of us have had the dream to work for oneself and do a dream job - I did it for many years. Now I'm working for someone else and I still enjoy it. Friends started in jobs they disliked and have moved into other fields. An engineer friend did a Masters in Psychology and is now in HR and training of the engineering firm he worked in.

I have been where you are, having returned from travelling at a similar age and with a similar attitude as yours. I had worked in a particular field after leaving college for a few years so there wasn't the pressure that you are under to work in the area in which you studied.

In the meantime, get a bar job or a part time role to earn and get off the dole etc

lyinghere

whereamigoing1 wrote: »

I dunno, my feeling on the whole thing is that I am dying with every breath I take, why should I take a job in a field that I get zero enjoyment out of. I made some silly mistakes when I picked my college course, I was overly concerned with money. Coming from a working class background, I didn't wanna grow up and have feck all cash, so I picked a career with high monetary rewards.

You're right that I need a job though, I don't dispute that. I don't like sponging off the social welfare. My main concern was being torn over whether I should get one in my field of study or am I better off trying for something in a supermarket part-time. Everyone around me expects me to get a job in this field.

I'd try get a job in your field. If it pays so well start saving for another course that you actually want to do . Realise you've made a mistake and there's no quick fix but if you really want you can turn things around. In the meantime prob best to suck it up and make as much money as you can for something you want to do.

LegacyUser

Dr Turk Turkelton wrote: »

Hi op, just my opinion here. I reckon you should follow your dream of lying in bed all day thinking of the nice foreign places you could be instead of Ireland as long as you can support yourself with no help from social welfare.
If you need social welfare to survive then get a job and stop bumming off all the people who go to work everyday to subsidise social welfare and college fees.

This is very harsh. There are some people that have lived their entire life on the dole with no want to better themselves but hey,let's all turn on the young guy who has a dream and is just confused on how to do it? This is the attitude that makes me hate ireland and wouldn't blame anyone for wanting to travel.

OP, do what you want to do,you only live once but you do need some sort of plan on how you are going to save and work a part time job. I wish you luck

miamee

OP it sounds to me like you are afraid to take on the professional job you have qualified for and instead would rather do a part-time supermarket job - probably the same type of job you had while in college and that you know you can a) cope with and b) do well at with no real pressure. Does that ring true at all? It is strange that an educated man of 25 thinks he can fund a travelling lifestyle and/or a return to college with a part-time wage stacking shelves so I'm assuming that you are a bit stuck with the fear of what comes next in life rather than thinking clearly. I'm not saying it would be impossible with the supermarket job - that's where I worked in college and I loved it - but given the option, if your only goal is to earn as much money as possible for your next move, I think the choice is pretty obvious.

It is foolish in my opinion to turn down any job interview; while the economy is recovering a bit jobs are not exactly ten a penny in most industries either. If it's a small industry, you don't want a reputation as a flake before you've even worked in it! Applying for jobs and then turning down the job interviews comes across as flakey.

Unfortunately in life nothing worth having will just drop into your lap - you have to plan and work towards it just like the rest of us. When you get to where you want to be, you will be proud of the hard work you have put in even in a job you don't like (or maybe especially because of that).

LegacyUser

miamee wrote: »

OP it sounds to me like you are afraid to take on the professional job you have qualified for and instead would rather do a part-time supermarket job - probably the same type of job you had while in college and that you know you can a) cope with and b) do well at with no real pressure. Does that ring true at all? It is strange that an educated man of 25 thinks he can fund a travelling lifestyle and/or a return to college with a part-time wage stacking shelves so I'm assuming that you are a bit stuck with the fear of what comes next in life rather than thinking clearly. I'm not saying it would be impossible with the supermarket job - that's where I worked in college and I loved it - but given the option, if your only goal is to earn as much money as possible for your next move, I think the choice is pretty obvious.

It is foolish in my opinion to turn down any job interview; while the economy is recovering a bit jobs are not exactly ten a penny in most industries either. If it's a small industry, you don't want a reputation as a flake before you've even worked in it! Applying for jobs and then turning down the job interviews comes across as flakey.

Unfortunately in life nothing worth having will just drop into your lap - you have to plan and work towards it just like the rest of us. When you get to where you want to be, you will be proud of the hard work you have put in even in a job you don't like (or maybe especially because of that).

Thanks for your post - at least it wasn't condescending in nature like some of the other replies. With regards to your reply, I wouldn't say I'm afraid to take on a job related to my degree. I actually had one for one year with a reputable company from early 2014 until the end of January this year. I absolutely hated it. Not just the job, but the whole 9-5 slog. Feeling too mentally drained at the end of the day to do anything, it was a horrible lifestyle. The only perk was the money was brilliant, I got loads of overtime and that enabled me to go travelling.

I don't think I can fund my lifestyle stacking shelves, trust me. I'm quite afraid right now. The point you made about coming across as flakey is probably valid. It is quite a small industry and i'm probably getting a name for myself. But sitting at home, studying for interviews and feeling a deep sense of "I don't even want this job". It's a hard-hitting realization to come to.

I'm lucky enough to be in a position where I am debt-free, but I also don't have much money in my bank. I was accepted as a writer on a content mill website recently that pays €11 per article. Hardly an amazing salary considering I can only write a maximum of two articles per day, but that at least gives me a boost in terms of possibly being able to make it as a freelancer. My train of thought is that it might be better to work hard now at doing something I like, albeit with very little money coming in, but getting good at it and then having the lifestyle I want down the line. If I work in a job related to my degree for a year or 2 I will just find myself in this position again. Yes, I will almost certainly have a decent amount of money in my bank, but I won't be any closer to doing what I want to do.

HiGlo

whereamigoing1 wrote: »

My main concern was being torn over whether I should get one in my field of study or am I better off trying for something in a supermarket part-time. Everyone around me expects me to get a job in this field.

Have you investigated fully the options for courses in either web development or writing? How expensive will they be? How much content in involved? Are they heavy going? Manageable content? It's all well and good asking the internet if you should take a part time mc job or enter full time into the area you're trained for - surely it all comes down to the practicalities of it.
Is it feasible for you to work part time and fund yourself and the course? If it is, then sure, go for it. If it's not, why not put in a few years in the 9-5 lark and fund yourself for what you really want to do.

I'm currently working on getting myself out of a job I no longer want to be in. I clock in and out of my challenging, busy office job but I study part time in an academically heavy area and am 4 years along an 8-10 year path to change career. It is very possible to work full time and study part time. Esp at your young age and when you don't have kids to manage too....

LegacyUser

I lost a lengthy post. Basically it comes down to how I think you're being v unrealistic about the web Dev & freelance writing: both require a solid rep of years of high achievement when physically present in the building, before someone will pay you to travel the world and occasionally submit pieces.

I really think you are living in dreamland if you think web Dev and/or freelance writing will support you.